Widowed in 2012

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Comment by Brandywine Gal on August 4, 2012 at 1:12pm

Cher,

I lost my husband of 39 years on June 8.  I am not too far from you up fwy 680 in Alamo.  I lost my mom at age 87 Jan 2011 and am often down at her house in Sunnyvale sorting and clearing stuff.  It is located off Hwy 28 near Sunnyvale Saratoga.  Maybe we could meet up some time.

Comment by cher2012 on August 3, 2012 at 8:18pm

I just joined this group a couple of weeks ago, and have not been on much, but I lost my husband to cancer March 23, 2012. We were married 31 years ,and I still have a teenage daughter at home. My mom was diagnosed with colon cancer last month, so now she is having chemo. I am doing OK, but would really like to find some widows in my area to talk in person with, and maybe get together for some fun activities. I live in the San Jose, CA area, so if anyone is in this area and would like to meet, let me know.

Comment by telechick on August 2, 2012 at 10:01pm

I'm going to sell Corey's truck on Craigslist.  I had good luck selling my grandmother's car that way.

If you don't feel comfortable selling it yourself, perhaps one of your husband's friends could help you? Or any friend for that matter.  do you know anyone who's into trucks/cars who might be able to help?

Check the listings on Craigslist and Autotrader.com etc, for your area to see what a decent price would be.

At least if it's sold you won't have to pay insurance/registration/etc. Could one of your kids use it and take over the payments or at least pay for some of it to ease your burden?

Good luck.  As soon as I get the title back from the DMV for C's truck I'm going to have to do the same thing.  I'm not looking forward to it.

Comment by keepinup on August 2, 2012 at 3:43pm

Well, its been 7 months since my husband passed away and I finally decided that I can not afford to keep his 2006 F-150. But oh, how I love the truck because it was his truck and you just feel his spirit all in it.

The problem I am facing is that the truck won't sell for no where near what I owe on it.  It has been in an accident for one and the interest rate was high, so I am so upside down it.

The payments are really hurting my household income. FYI. I do have three children, one going off to college next week.

Any advice on ways to get this truck sold.

Comment by Karen on August 2, 2012 at 1:09pm

I watched our travel trailer be hauled off to the dealer's last week in order to be sold.  We had such a good time in it - went to SC, FL up to NJ to visit our grandchildren, etc.  Now it's gone.  Am thinking of selling the house here and moving back up north to be near son, but I have a feeling that it wouldn't sell in any kind of a hurry.  Wish I could just empty it, go to a new place and leave it empty.  I just cannot believe this has happened.  My life is over as I knew it, and I hate every  minute of it anymore.  Maybe if I had a decent, for-real friend locally it would make a difference, but I have no one.

I am waiting for my mother to call and say what time they will be here tomorrow.  I am fully expecting, however, that she will either NOT call at all and ignore the whole thing, or will call and say they are not coming for this reason or that.  If she does that, I'm afraid it will be the end of our relationship.  They returned a couple of weeks ago from my brother's up in Ohio (from SC) where they were there for a week, but they might be willing to give me two days.  Nice, eh?  How will I continue in this life like this?  I feel like I'm being punished day after day.  Why?

Comment by Diane on August 2, 2012 at 12:20pm

I just watched Don's 2005 silver convertible Mini Cooper S, that he excitedly picked out, option by option back in February of 2005, be trailered to its new home in Michigan this morning.  It took me 5 months to decide to sell it and another month to find a buyer.  It hurts, no way around it, it hurts.

Comment by Meema on August 2, 2012 at 10:56am

I'm in the process of selling the vacation home my husband loved. I even scattered some of his ashes in the pond there, as he requested. But I can't imagine ever going there on my own, my son never much liked the place, and as much as it's a relief to find a buyer--they even want all the furniture, which is a major hassle avoided--it hurts. It's a loss, no way around it.

Comment by Brandywine Gal on August 1, 2012 at 9:36pm

I am so sorry the two of you are faced with selling your dream homes.  Fortunately I have no plans to sell our home that we bought 35 years ago and raised our kids in-so many memories.

However, my mom passed Jan 2011 just about the time I think Steve probably was getting sick.  I attributed his being tired to my mom's death.  Her knew her before he knew me!  Infact she introduced us.  I am back to sorting and trying to "unhoardify" her house-what a bloody nightmare it is.  I hope to get it on the marjet and sold next spring if I can.  I have dumped 150+ trash bins of old magazines, neswpapers, empty plastic containers, junk mail etc. and I still can't walk through the house or garage.  It is so depressing!  I have one bedroom and soon a second cleared out.  I hope to rent out those bedrooms to pay for the taxes, utilities, gardener, etc.  Fortunately the location is prime-5 minutes from Apple and yahoo in Sunyvale, IE Silicon Valley.  House one door over just sold and their were 10 offers.  It sold for $125,000 over asking price

:-)

Comment by telechick on August 1, 2012 at 8:57pm

Thank you all.  We didn't build it (it was built in 1927) but we were in the process of rennovating it so it would be our dream home.  We were going to grow old there together. 

Leanne, good luck to you as well.  I hope we both sell quickly and for a profit.  That's the least good that could happen out of all of this awfulness.

Comment by Leeanne on August 1, 2012 at 5:12pm

Telechik
I too am in the process of selling our dream home, the difference is that we were married in it just after we moved in 6years ago. It breaks my heart to sell it, we put alot of thought, work and lovely personal touches into it when we designed and built it.
I am so sorry that you have to do it, I know how hard it is.
Good luck selling. ((( hugs)))).

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