Its official I just hate hate hate hate this life without my Helen. Cancer snatched Helen from me 30th June and I thought I was doing OK, but every day is getting so more wearisome. I go out, I talk to people, I talk to my 2 sons and I have a laugh and a joke but in those lonesome days and late at night, like now, I just miss her so much. I want her back but know that can't happen, but it dos'nt stop me wanting.
What you expressed helped me today. Thank you. This stinks!
Hi HelensRay, I absolutely am where you are. I lost my Charlie, also to cancer, Feb. 24, and life just keeps getting more difficult and hopeless. I'm tired of doing everything large and small by myself. I miss him like crazy. I too have family and friends and do limited socializing, go to the gym, etc., but all my old ways of coping flat out don't work. I know your pain and wish there were some way I could help us both. I hope you can find some peace, even for a few minutes each day.
Have had a strange experience this evening. Have a had quite a boozy weekend, out last night to a gentleman's evening at the the rugby club, too much to drink and don't really remember getting home. Back to the rugby club this afternoon, again a bit to much to drink but had a good time. Got home, made a sandwich and sat down with a small (!?) whiskey. My mind wandered to Helen and I was transported back to earlier times and it was more like an out of body experience, it was just like Helen and I were there, in Spain, Germany, Portugal - it was really lovely. Then reality broke in, but I did resist it - I was so happy in such a long time. Obviously reality has to kick in, but those 5 to 10 minutes were really nice