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Widowed in 2011

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Members: 506
Latest Activity: Sep 5

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Comment by chef (John) on September 5, 2017 at 9:46am

Glad to hear you had a good time with the sights and the conversations, Barzan. :-)

Comment by Barzan on September 4, 2017 at 7:02am

I just returned from my trip to Mackinac Island.  I had such a great time.  There were quite a few women on this bus tour (wasn't a fan of buses) who were also widowed.  I had the opportunity to chat with them about their spouses, how long ago it happened and how they are dealing with the loss.  We had the support of each other and I think it made such a difference.  And - if you have the opportunity to visit Mackinac Island, I highly recommend it.  What a beautiful place!

Comment by Mark99 on August 30, 2017 at 3:33am

chef (John) So true so true. 

Comment by chef (John) on August 28, 2017 at 6:53am

Most days anymore, I tend to feel "balanced".

Having lived through the worst thing that will ever happen to me (and we ALL get 100 points on the Holmes-Rahe Stress Scale for being widowed), I tend to be somewhat foolhardy/fatalistic at times. Whenever someone says, "What's the worst that could happen?", I tend to respond, "Nothing! The worst thing that can ever happen has already happened to me."

Comment by Princess Warrior Widow on August 26, 2017 at 1:22pm
chef (John) I am working on being even keeled. I like being balanced. There will be good days and some days that aren't great. I have suffered the death of my husband. I can survive anything. Sometimes the really good still catch me off guard. That's ok. I can adjust.
Comment by chef (John) on August 25, 2017 at 10:07am

Do you have times when something good happens, but you may also be concerned about something bad happening too?

This used to happen to me a lot during Years I and II, but the reality is that things just happen randomly. I do my best to keep myself at an even keel, and do my best not get too euphoric whenever something "good" happens, nor too depressed whenever something "bad" happens.

Comment by Princess Warrior Widow on August 25, 2017 at 7:11am

When something good happens do you feel like something bad might happen and wait for the other shoe to drop.  This morning I had breakfast outside on the rooftop at my job.  The weather is pretty amazing for August.  I feel great today.  On the other hand,  I have a little anxiety about something bad happening.  I am working on this and learning to enjoy the moment. I want to fully enjoy the good things in my life.

Do you have times when something good happens, but you may also be concerned about something bad happening too?

Do

Comment by Princess Warrior Widow on August 25, 2017 at 7:07am

LucyGoo it is a blessing to have the friendships and share Sunday Dinner.  Barzan that is awesome that you have your mother-in-law who is 92 and in great shape.  What a blessing.  I strive to be like that.  chef (John) that sounds like an amazing trip. 

Comment by chef (John) on August 24, 2017 at 12:50pm

Princess Warrior: I'm not doing anything much this summer, but I am going to Santiago, Easter Island, and the Atacama Desert in October and November.

Comment by Barzan on August 21, 2017 at 6:52am

Thanks Deb!  I'm looking forward to it.  My 92 year old mother-in-law took care of me after my knee replacement surgery and has asked me to accompany her on this bus trip to Mackinac.  How could I say no.  She's a lovely lady who is very active - plays golf 3-4 times a week, works out and does water aerobics every week.  I think she'll be racing around on the island with me puffing along behind her. 

I will have some fudge for sure.  Hope the weather will be nice since it's the rainy season there now.

 

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