Widowed in 2011

Comment

Comment by Gordy's widow yesterday

man it must be in the air huh! we would have been putting the boat in the water, and been out on the bike like a doz times, which I still can not ride YET I WILL though..... but not hanging on to my baby it is too sad...... 

Comment by Mariposa on Thursday

Gordy's widow - yes, I hear that voice in my own head.  I realize that my grief does weigh me down and it is hard to move forward at times. I feel as if I am in a fog of sadness for the past week, and it affects my thinking.

Comment by Gordy's widow on Thursday

paula, I don't think they do as they are in a place filled with love and light BUT they can be around us and see us, but not the other way around..... I have been told that my gordy is always around me  I believe that..... I just can't see him but I know he  probably can see me so I think they don't miss us as much if that makes sense...   

Comment by Gordy's widow on Thursday

in side my head is a voice SCREAMING "THIS IS NOT THE LIFE I WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE"

Comment by Gordy's widow on Thursday

Dear Juls, you are in my prayers today..... I am there with you, feel exactly how you feel.I am hopimg you get through the day ok  

Comment by Mariposa on Tuesday

Juls and Paula- so sorry for your longing and missing what was lost. I don't know what it is, perhaps the time of year, but I had a hard week last week because I just wanted him to be near, just wanted to be  held in his arms.  Instead, I plod on through another day in this new chapter of life. Adjusting is hard and so many well intended friends and family just don't understand. All I hear is that once I find a job that I will feel better.  A job is not a substitute for the husband I lost or the life we had together.  Thanks for listening. Peace and blessings to all of you.

Comment by Paula on Tuesday

Juls...I am so sorry... I feel the same way, completely 25 months and 13 days and the missing never seems to leave me for long....its like this constant background that is forever mine now. I continue to feel like it was just yesterday > I have such a good memory for smells,( I can still smell his freshly shaven face) for taste, ( I can smell his kiss, and the scent of his lips, for touch i can feel his calloused hand holding mine, for hearing I can hear his laughter , his words. for seeing, I see every inch of his body perfectly... 

I said out loud to him the other day.... yes i want you to be happy where you are, your so lucky you can see me, and you know whats a round the corner, however i am not clearly privy to that, my time will come, but in the meantime  as in the titanic....my heart beats on for you. 

I wonder if he misses me as much as I miss him....

Comment by Juls on Tuesday

My sweetheart husband crossed over 2 years ago tomorrow.  The world cracked, the light went out and I was destroyed.  Each day I put one foot in front of the other and go through the motions.  Yes, the pain is less intense and I meltdown less frequently.  But 24 months is a blink of an eye compared to 23 years of constant friendship and love. I want to hear his voice and his laugh and I ache for him tonight.  Just come back to me for 5 minutes.  Memories are not enough - they never will be. I miss you more than I thought was ever possible.

Comment by Mariposa on May 10, 2013 at 2:32pm

Gordy's widow- my thoughts exactly- DUH!  He changed doctor's but it was still at the same oncology practice as it was a group of them. I just hope it does not happen again. Peace.

Comment by Gordy's widow on May 10, 2013 at 10:36am

I mean DUH don't these people in these oncology offices  make sure they remove the people that have passed on from their mailing lists? IT'S not brain surgery. I worked most of my life in a dentists  office and the staff was very sensitive to  removing patients  that passed on. So they would not get a recall or post card! 

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