Widowed in 2011

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Comment by Joyce on November 18, 2011 at 12:20am

@Tomdar2, I know everyone says one day at a time or on minute at a time, and I do get that most of the time, but tonight I'm just walking around saying Why, What's the point!  I just miss him so much.  I'm sure I'll feel a little better tomorrow, but tonight I'm just sad.  Hugs to you!

Comment by tomdar2 on November 18, 2011 at 12:08am

Amen to that! Six months is harder than I expected. I hit that next Wednesday.

Comment by Stumbling (Susan) on November 17, 2011 at 9:58pm

Oh, Cutie!   I wish I could just hug you. i saved a bottle of Ed's favorite cologne, and once in a while I will just take a small whiff.  It brings comfort, but many tears.  Your memories will get you thought this.  and it is OK to be mad at God.  His shoulders are broad, and he will help you carry the load.  You are braver than you think you are, you are smarter than you think you are, and you are stronger than you think you are!

Comment by Marsha on November 17, 2011 at 9:50pm

(((((Cutie))))) It's ok to be mad at God. He understands. Anger at God is part of this journey of grief. There are no answers as to why our loved ones are gone other than it was their time to go. All we can do is take it a day at a time and a baby step at a time. This journey is a roller coaster ride we all want to get off of. Wish we could. Pray you find some peace and comfort to help you on this journey.

Comment by cutie on November 17, 2011 at 8:43pm

It is so funny that I am reading these posts today because last night standing in our closet I cried as I smelled everything of Matt's and nothing smells like him anymore...I want his smell to last forever...please...please...PLEASE!!! Why can't just one thing smell like him forever...even his body pillow that I cling to every night stopped smelling like him...it really sucks..he has been gone for six months already,can it really be that long??and I say it again, at the same time it feels just like yesterday that he was holding me and telling me how much he loves me and how I was his favorite...I cry every single day still,sometimes more than others but it still hurts as much as it did when i got the phone call...can someone tell me what we did wrong to not get longer together??? We really lived our lives"right" and yet I am here and he is not within reach....I am still so mad at God and I know that is wrong but so is a person like my Matt being gone...God has everything,why did he have to take my heart????

Comment by Jus me Becca Z on November 17, 2011 at 8:16am

White Rain hairspray... that's the smell that reminds me of Jim. That makes me smile.

Comment by Stumbling (Susan) on November 17, 2011 at 5:44am

I have his brush in a zip lock bag.  Once in a while I will open it to smell him, and it's been almost 7 months for me.

Comment by judy on November 16, 2011 at 11:25pm

Didn't realize that if you put the clothes in the bag it would keep the smell.

Have all his shoes too - wonder if the smell stays - I loved everything about my Justin - just everything......  I look at Justin's picture alot during work time...  I would never put them down never!

Comment by carolynne on November 16, 2011 at 9:39pm

Mem....it's so hard to tear yourself away,though, isn't it?? I find myself picking up Rod's pictures all day long at work even though I know it will make me cry...someone actually suggested I maybe should take them down. What???! That's not happening any time soon. Rod's clothes don't smell like him anymore...wish I had thought to put them in a bag.

Comment by mem5711 (Denise) on November 16, 2011 at 8:16pm

It's been three months and I'm again having a bad night. I'll go a few days okay and then it hits me. My daughter made a beautiful dvd set to music of pictures from the last thirty years....I've been watching it (for the millionth time). Maybe I should stop watching....but I love seeing his face so happy. I just can't believe he's gone.... I'm still waiting for him to walk in the door:((( I found myself in his closet just holding his shirts...they still smell like him:( 

Also Tink...my husband is still my next of kin and the first phone call in case of emergency. I suppose I should change them, but I can't do it yet.

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