Widowed in 2011

Comment

Comment by Lisa (lost) Lamb on February 15, 2012 at 4:43pm

Letha, I agree with you. I would need to get some kind of justice for my husband as well. I could never just let any of this go without being able to confront the man that took my husband, and even if it didn't make him feel or take any responsibility I would need him to understand what his actions took from me and my life. Then I could start to put the pieces of my life back together. You do what you need to, for your own piece of mind. I'm sure what ever you decide to do you will honor Micheal, and he will be proud of you for standing up for him.  (((Hugs)))

Comment by t2 on February 15, 2012 at 4:42pm

just various ones throughout the thread. i usually check out the groups once a week or so...so i'm a little behind.

Comment by Krista Westervelt (whoknows) on February 15, 2012 at 4:34pm

t2, whose comment are you responding to?

Comment by t2 on February 15, 2012 at 4:29pm

I guess I am seeing things differently. I am a very big believer in science, and I recognize the very real possibility that death is the end. It would be great if it weren't. But I feel that I have to be real and try not to romanticize about the afterlife...because I don't really feel there is one. The love I have for my wife is still alive but I realize that she isn't. And that may be the reality of things.

Comment by Krista Westervelt (whoknows) on February 15, 2012 at 3:21pm

So deeply sorry, Letha.

Did they have you do some sort of victim impact statement? Is it too late to do so?

If nothing else, you'd think they'd make the guy go around and do some sort of community service type thing, like having to go around and talk about what happened and whatnot to promote safer driving around cyclists. 

Comment by Stumbling (Susan) on February 15, 2012 at 2:43pm

Hugs Letha.

Comment by Letha on February 15, 2012 at 2:38pm

Thanks for all the remarks. Don't worry, the man isn't going to ruin my life..not anymore than he already HAS by taking my husband. But after this I think I may have found my future goal in life..to see these laws changed and make sure that in the future people pay for what they do..and pay more than $195 for taking a life! I wish you all could actually see/read the accident report. This happened on a long, flat, straight stretch of road on a clear day. My husband was riding his bike on the paved shoulder, wearing bright clothing and with a red flashing LED light on the back of his bike..and for whatever reason, this idiot drove OFF the road and hit him. He wasn't drunk or on drugs..he was perfectly sober. He had NO excuse for driving off that road at the precise moment he got to my husband. My lawyer said after reading the reports it was like he did it intentionally.

Sorry to go on and on about this..but this is one of the very few places I can actually vent my anger. I know Michael would want me to move on and be happy..but being a long time cyclist, I feel he would also want me to seek justice for him. And that's what I will do.

Comment by jimswife33 (Michelle) on February 15, 2012 at 2:04pm

Yesterday was the worst, I cried off an on all day.  Today seems even worse, I think yesterday just wore me out.

Letha, Im so sorry, that is just wrong.  How do they determine these things.  

And that social security payment is just ridiculous.  I havent even recieved it yet, but you pay into ss your whole working life and alot of people dont even get to receive their retirement (which means they keep it) and thats all they can give you.  Plus they make you wait til 60 to get your husbands benefits hoping you will remarry and they wont have to give it to you either.  What an insult, they know there is no way that will cover anything related to a funeral.  Plus the mortuary told me thats per couple, when we die, our family will not even get that.  Just disgusting.  Peoples lives our worth so much more.

Comment by judy on February 15, 2012 at 1:57pm

Take heart - that he will make another mistake - since his driving record is horrendous - and then he will pay the price.

Really feel for you Letha - but try and not let him ruin your life.

Comment by Wanderer530 (Bernie) on February 15, 2012 at 1:28pm

@Letha:

Your husband's life AND your world . . . $195.  

I cannot possibly imagine what you are going through!

Susan is right though, do not let this eat away at you.  It has already taken Michael, do not let it destroy you or the rest of your life. 

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