Widowed in 2011

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Comment by kimmi on April 10, 2012 at 8:08am

Good morning all. I seem to be lost as well. I'm sure you can all relate. Nothing seems to be lifting for me...maybe it's just reality settling in. I've been reading all your comments about step kids and such. My husband and I were also given a second chance as he often said. THere are three steps but they are being very supportive and wonderful. We were together for 18 years. THe complication comes from their mother. She has been awful throughout this whole ordeal and it has become very heartbreaking for the kids....all about money. She is now attempting to go after his pension after trying to get insurance and suggesting his daughter sue me. I am really missing my husband more than ever. He died November 8. THis site is so helpful to connect with others who get it. I was told by a friend awhile ago to tell people that I'm fine with a smile on my face and soon I would be fine! Well, I don't want to be fine. I'm sad, lost, lonely. And I want my husband back.

...thanks for letting me vent a little!

Comment by Lisa on April 10, 2012 at 6:43am

Joyce.  Me too!  I was putting mine off and brought out the paperwork last night and yuck - I had to answer these sterile questions about my "spouse" passing away in the last tax year like it was some sort of formality.  It made me feel ill.  In the same drawer I found a long letter that my husband had written to me about a year before he died.  I thought...don't read it...don't read it....but I read it anyway.  It made me remember why I loved him so much and why I miss him so much.  I had to stop several times because I was crying so hard I could not see and then instead of putting it away, I kept reading until the end.  SIX pages.  These first are so hard.

Thinking of you.

Lisa

Comment by Hunt on April 10, 2012 at 1:17am

Joyce - I hate taxes! My biggest regret was marrying 6 days before tax day, while being self employed!!!! mOST stressful week leading up to anniversary!! I don't regret marrying her - best thing I ever did, but I sure have wished more than once that I did it farther away from April 15!

Thank you Lisa.

Kittmom - are you in OC too? Or just love the beach?

Comment by Joyce on April 9, 2012 at 11:31pm

I know I was putting off doing my taxes until the last minute.   As I went through all the paperwork tonight, I know why.  God, it can rip your heart out with all the in your face reminders.  Another first I don't want to deal with!  

Comment by Lisa on April 9, 2012 at 9:54pm

Hunt - I am so happy that you were able to spend your anniversary with your children and cherish happy memories of your times with your wife.  I'm sure it was a blessing for your children as well.

Comment by kittymom on April 9, 2012 at 9:50pm

Hunt, so glad you had such a nice day!! BTW, the entire beach is my favorite!!! LOL

 

Comment by Hunt on April 9, 2012 at 7:46pm

Thank you all, for your kind words and wishes. It's been a pretty nice day. I have felt sad, but had some happy memories and a nice time with my younger 2 kids. We walked at my late wife's favorite stretch of Laguna Beach, had lunch at her favorite restaurant, and my kids asked me about our wedding and times together before they were born and while very young. It was a really sweet time, and a happy one for me. I had a nice call from my in-laws, and will be entertaining more family tonight, so not a lot of alone-time, but I am enjoying it.

Comment by Letha on April 9, 2012 at 3:40pm

Happy Anniversary, Hunt. Wishing you a day filled with happy memories.

Comment by jimswife33 (Michelle) on April 9, 2012 at 1:45pm

Happy Anniversary Hunt.  I hope today you can cherish the memories you had.  My thoughts go out to you today. 

Comment by MissHIm11 on April 9, 2012 at 12:48pm

So very well said Joyce. As parents we hardly ever put our needs first. <3

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