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Widowed in 2011

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Comment by Gordy's widow on September 22, 2014 at 1:26pm

hang in there slick tomorrow will be a better day it just has to be! 

Comment by Gail on September 22, 2014 at 12:40pm
I just received a card that read "I know you need to get through this on your own, in your own way...."

I can't "get through this". This is something I'll be living with the rest of my life. It's insulting! Grief isn't something you get through. I wish I could get through it and arrive on the other side feeling like I used to. That's impossible!

I just can't stand it anymore! Right now I am annoyed with most people. Good thing I'm home from work with my two dogs and don't have to deal with anyone or I think I'd scream!

Thanks for letting me vent!
G
Comment by Slick on September 22, 2014 at 5:46am

I know..I feel the same.....my closest girlfriends since I was a child all passed in our early 50's so I don't have them to lean on either....it's so hard....

Comment by Sharmann on September 22, 2014 at 5:43am
and then they seem surprised when I have a meltdown. I feel like these decisions I need to make, should I retire, should I sell the house, should I move closer to family, are all discussions I should be having with Steve.
Comment by Slick on September 22, 2014 at 5:32am

Sharmann.....I also look Ok to  others...and even probably sound Ok to them...but inside I feel as if I;m dying a slow death....

Comment by Sharmann on September 22, 2014 at 5:26am
Hi Al. It's been a while since I have posted, but I have been reading some of your comments and can so totally relate. I feel that I am at a crossroads and just don't know which way to turn. I'm getting ready for work right now and all I want to do is stay in bed. I am finding that I just don't want to be with anyone or do anything. I'm sure on the outside it looks as though eepverythingnis fine, but I am so sad all the time. And I know it is related to being alone. I was on some family vacations in august and really enjoyed being around folks. Now that I'm home in this big empty house, I hate it. I'm going to,talk yo a realtor and I am pretty close to retiring, but then what?
Comment by Slick on September 22, 2014 at 4:46am

JS352......I agree totally .....about relationships.....I need more love in my life to give and receive...BUT ....although I used to think it had to be by way of a male/female relationship ..I no longer do.....love is love to me now..if I can help someone and it fulfills us both that's all that matters....I also have met no one who I would want to stick with...or even date.....I am in a bad place right now and hope it passes...because it's scaring me.....3 1/2 years later ....I cry and cry...I have to force myself to do anything..I was better at a year...I do push myself to go to my volunteering....2 full days....hard work...in a specialty cancer treatment facility.....I do feel as if I;m giving back...Bill died from lung and bone cancer...and I had lung cancer last winter...so far all tests are clear..I want to move but don't know where ,...just know it would be good for me to downsize.....all of a sudden I am anxious all the time.....and can't make decisions....at times I feel I am losing my mind....if I haven't already.........PEACE

Comment by Slick on September 21, 2014 at 2:25pm

Gordy's wife...what a wonderful idea...I sabotage every plan I could possibly have..I panic and get scared to go anywhere when it's time..and I;m not like that...but after over 3 1/2 years..I am so tired of going everywhere alone...and being disappointed time and time again...when no one even says hello......I'm at my wits end....I talked to my oldest daughter today...and we decided together that I am overwhelmed with what I should and shouldn;t do....I would like to downsize and move to a smaller place..I feel like I;m leaving Bill behind so of course I;m dragging my feet...and I know I'm not leaving him anywhere ,...couldn;t ..still love him too much...but I need a smaller place...and one that is mine...everything here is "us" everywhere I go it's "us".. I need something that is just me at this point......you should be very proud of yourself.......I know Gordy is.......God bless..

Comment by Gordy's widow on September 21, 2014 at 12:42pm

dear Gail & slick, in the beginning of the summer I told my mil that we were going to say yes to every invitation got invited to a "new" neighbors kids grad party...in july I think it was. She thought we maybe wouldn't go becuase we didn't kn ow them that well. I said no we are going and glad we did... while in Boston my sil invited me to go to her neighbors for dinner as  my brother wanted to stay home I didn't know  a soul ..... it was hard it felt weird... mostly all couples... I ate and stayed for a little while to chat.....  later my sil told me she was surprised  I went .... and was proud I did... 

Not any invites or dates still not looking but trying to do more on my own...

Comment by t2 on September 20, 2014 at 8:33pm
Email me.
 

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