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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.
Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.
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Latest Activity: 57 minutes ago
Mark 99: I particularly liked the link titled "Grief is Vivisection to Those Left Behind", but I do have a dark sense of humor.
Memories are a strange thing. I find them to be both comforting and upsetting, but I also realize that I am no longer the same person I was seven years ago. Sometimes I feel as though there are three versions of me mixed in with those memories: The Blissfully-ignorant-pre-widower Me, the Grief-stricken Me, and then the Working-things-through Me. Moving forward alone is difficult as well as unsettling, but it is also something that I have to do. Perhaps in a few years, I shall have learned more about myself and (maybe) also be better at accepting all that has happened. Reading everyone's comments is always useful.
Mark99, interesting comment about memories. I have found there are days, and nights, when the memories immobilize me and I can't move my thoughts to the here and now. It takes a lot to sort through those memories and put them in the back regions of mind mind - so they are still there but I can focus and do other things in the present. I have tried setting aside a block of time that I make an appointment with my self - maybe using a picture or object (a cup of tea) and sit there and enjoy. Then I but it back and go on with the day. I think it helped me to feel I don't have to forget the past but also that there is a future.
HUGS to al
“Does A Memory Love You?” We embrace memories because they act as mortar holding the worn bricks of our lives together. Memories refresh our thirst for meaning of the unknown.
Princess, Thank you. She is making great strides daily but may not be able to regain her freedom.
Cee - I believe when someone decides to leave the Village they have the choice of deleting all of their content or leaving it there and just removing their membership. I agree that it's unfortunate when a long time member decides to delete everything because so many conversations can be impacted.
We do have many who have retained memberships who never post; however, there have been a good number of those who have posted after a very long time (sometimes years) and shared that they were reading all of this time and just didn't feel up to posting and interacting ... but that reading the posts gave them what they needed.
We will be moving Widowed Village to a new hosting platform sometime this year and expect the new site to be easier to navigate and will allow us to keep conversations on the same topics all together. It will also be closed to Google searches, so only members will be able to see the Village membership content. That said, we will not be able to transfer everything from this site over to the new one, so some things will be lost. We had hoped to have this move in place by now, but since we're a small volunteer team it keeps getting pushed back.
I didn't know that when some one left the group or WV all of their posts would be deleted. It is sad to loose members who are willing to share and help others. Deleting the messages also takes away the good advice they have given us. This is the first time I have seen that happen. On the other side I see names of people still listed that have not posted in several years. I find that disappointing when I find someone in my area or with my interests.
I am not one of the most active posters but do try to read.
Hugs, Barzan, as you deal with your mother's situation.
My mother died recently and I am now in a parent/child reverse situation with my eighty-four-year-old father, helping him deal with being widowed.
I noticed the disappearance of Slick's postings, but I didn't know what had happened.
Barzan I’m sorry to hear about your mom.
Slick, I don’t see any of your posts. I hope you don’t stay away long. I love you sharing how you husband greeted you each morning.
Slick, I would have written earlier to your sad post but my Mom had a stroke a week ago and I’ve dine nothing but be at her bedside, check her mail and take care of things for her. I really hope you hang in there with us. I have always valued your posts and shared with you. I’m sure I speak for this group that each of us is part of the whole and no one is more important than the other. I really hope you stay with us.
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