This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."


Born in the 50s

Groups are a place to connect with others you have something in common with. Please get acquainted here and make friends anywhere on the site.

Check the 'Help' tab for more guidance or send questions to [email protected]

Patience (Diane) is the group greeter.

Members: 757
Latest Activity: 8 hours ago

Discussion Forum

Camp Widow San Diego

Started by Kathy. Last reply by Dianne in Nevada Jul 9. 8 Replies

social security widow/widower benefits

Started by Lissa. Last reply by SweetMelissa2007 Jun 27. 16 Replies

Crazy - taxes

Started by KJPE. Last reply by cupspinner Apr 10. 4 Replies

Comment Wall


You need to be a member of Born in the 50s to add comments!

Comment by sewpatti on March 12, 2012 at 10:20pm

OK, maybe someone can explain this to me. 

Got onto facebook and my oldest step-daughter has a comment stating "Ohhh thats what's bothering me, my dads b day is on wed. Well I guess there's no need for an email this year." 

I really hate getting sucker punched. Didn't expect it to hit me like this.  Why, oh why would that statement hurt so much. 

Maybe I'm just tired, not sleeping well again.  We all need someone to stop the roller coaster. 

Comment by Letha on March 11, 2012 at 7:25am

Dorothy, my 40 year class reunion is in I'm determined to get myself in slightly better shape before that. I used to get up every morning and walk 3 miles..but since losing Michael all I do is walk my dog to the corner and back each morning. Lost my motivation to do that long walk and stay in shape. I can't afford a new wardrobe think it's about time to get the walking shoes back out and get busy.

Comment by Dorothy on March 11, 2012 at 6:13am


6 pounds isn't bad I have gained 14 (grrrrrr)

Have to get it off.

But have no motivation.



Comment by Letha on March 11, 2012 at 5:25am

LOL Paula!! When I got out of the shower just yesterday I looked in a mirror and thought "Oh boy..nobody gonna see THIS body!"  I'm sure I'm not the only one who turned to good old fashioned confort foods after losing a spouse. I got on my scale last week and realized I've gained 6 pounds. UGH!

Comment by Dorothy on March 10, 2012 at 4:30pm

Hi freddieb,


Thanks for sharing.

At times I  feLT  like I am not a whole person.

My life was so wrapped up in my hubby while he was sick.

Thanks for helpin me see there is hope for me to become whole  person again.



Comment by freddieb on March 10, 2012 at 4:13pm

Lissa, Yes, I felt very old when Walter died and he was 12 years older than me.  But, I was 53 when he died and when he was alive I felt young because he loved calling me a Spring Chicken. :)  Suddenly, there was no one around to tell me how pretty I was every morning and I started to question my clothes, my hair, my body, everything.  I looked at myself differently because I didn't have the covering of a husband, I guess.  I think when you're married people stop looking at you as an individual because you become "one", but when the other part of you is gone, you just feel vulnerable.  But, what I decided to do for my own self-image is to exercise, change my diet (because I needed to because my cholesterol was TOO high) and after 3 years I am 18 lbs lighter and I feel so much better than I did.  And, clothes look better on me now so I'm not so critical of the way I look.  I think it just took me time to learn how to focus on myself again  - even to find myself again.  I am still finding what I like as an individual.  It wasn't easy because when Walter died I felt like someone had snatched off my arm and threw it away.  I didn't feel right in my own skin anymore.  But, slowly but surely, I'm getting there.  It also has helped me that I've resumed some of the activities that I was involved in at church before he became ill.   I still miss Walter every day, and I don't expect that to ever change, really, but I like having things to do and places to go if I want to.  I also like it that people are starting to see me as a whole person again.  Maybe that's because I finally feel like I am.    

Comment by freddieb on March 10, 2012 at 4:00pm

I can't say that I really miss talking to a man because I've always had mainly female friends.  I do have male acquaintances from my church and my job, but no one that I would date, at this time.  If anyone is interested in dating me I wouldn't know it unless they were very blunt about it. A friend of mine had to tell me that Walter was flirting with me, that's how dense I am about those things. :)  But, I'm determined to have a full life whether there is a man in it or not, and right now I'm almost too busy because I still work full-time and I am involved in a lot of ministries at my church as well as spending time with my family and closest friends.   I think it's good to keep busy, but it's also good to be OK with your own company when you have to.  When no one is around but you and you can still be at peace that is the best of times. 

Comment by Dorothy on March 10, 2012 at 3:52pm


LMAO I know I am the same way.

I have alot of flab on me.

My body isn't the greatest at 61 years of age.

Thanks for the laugh I needed it.



Comment by JunieG on March 10, 2012 at 2:20pm

Paula, I second that sentiment 100%

Comment by MissingCB on March 10, 2012 at 1:52pm

Dorothy, I don't know what site it was or who said it but someone (a woman) wrote that she was watching her grandson and was taking a shower so she left the bathroom door open in case he needed her.  He walked into the bathroom, took one look and ran out screaming.  That's what I feel like would happen if any guy ever so me naked so I don't have any desire for anyone to see me naked.  It would require a looooooooonnnnngggggg courtship & marriage (so it would be harder to run away) before some guy sees me naked. 


Members (757)


© 2019   Created by Soaring Spirits.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service