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Remarried After Loss

Have you found your "Chapter Two"? Here's a place for those who have remarried or are in a new committed relationship to get acquainted and discuss concerns or issues - and maybe even answer questions for those who are just considering remarriage.

Your group Greeter is Doug.

Check the 'Help' tab for more guidance or send questions to [email protected]

Members: 48
Latest Activity: Feb 13

Discussion Forum

Kids - What do you tell them when we start dating ?

Started by Doug02122014 Dec 31, 2017. 0 Replies

The following is a summary of a lady's question in another Internet grief support group with my response. I’ve been spending time with a guy our family has known for some time.  Up until now we have…Continue

Tags: loss, after, dating, and, Kids

Dealing with the fear of losing a 2nd. or 3rd. spouse .

Started by Doug02122014. Last reply by Doug02122014 Dec 1, 2017. 7 Replies

Ok, how many of us have been down the road of "I'm not dating / remarring because I don't want to go through another loss of a spouse"?I have said all that, but the urge to continue living and moving…Continue

Wedding planning for Volume Two

Started by JHclecce. Last reply by Maria Louisa Nov 18, 2017. 5 Replies

I am finding that wedding planning is becoming VEEY difficult. I see these adorable ideas and now look at them through a widows eyes. For example instead of a guestbook there were empty bottles…Continue

Who is the best fit to marry a widowed person ? Another widowed person, someone who has never been married, or someone who is divorced ?

Started by Doug02122014. Last reply by Maria Louisa Nov 17, 2017. 20 Replies

This was my experience at getting back in the dating scene. The first person I went out with after loss was divorced, about 6-years younger than I and like me had 2-kids at home. I cannot tell you…Continue

Comment Wall

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Comment by Lostwithoutyou<3 on February 9, 2016 at 5:12pm
Just curious? How long did it take for everyone to date someone after your loss?
Comment by Don on February 8, 2016 at 10:44am

Well this  is a very interesting group.    Is it permissible to reveal that I want to remarry?   I'm 89,  healthy, active and adaptable.   Don't like living alone and looking for a partner to go the distance with.    I can be seen on MATCH.com

Comment by Doug02122014 on December 26, 2015 at 4:58pm
mariner (Andrew),

Congratulations,

I can't wait to hear your story! This is awesome news.
Comment by mariner (Andrew) on December 25, 2015 at 11:56pm
Love and blessings to all. My loss was in March. I got engaged last night to a wonderful lady whom I have known for 6 years and who conveniently lives in my condo building. I will provide more details on my story later.
Comment by AEDforever (Ali) on December 1, 2015 at 12:49pm

Hey Doug, I haven't been on in awhile as I have been dealing with health issues.  But I am surprisingly in a relationship.  Fortunately for me, he is also widowed, so he kinda "gets it" if you know what I mean. I still miss and love my husband, but I realize that doesn't mean I can't love someone else, too. It's complicated, but can be done.

Comment by my roses on November 16, 2015 at 5:10am

My Roses

Hi Doug that is a good idea... as I think we can still go on learning about relationships.  As  I have been involved in helping quite a few men both divorcedand widowed.... I  have seen how difficult it can be..... and we can make mistakes.   Congratulations  on  your marriage in September.

Did not know that you had  been  ' wedded" yet, although I knew that you had a new partner - I am so glad for you.  I think that the way you met can be very good... as in the past it was family and friends who introduced  'lovers' to each other.... and they had a chaperone with them... who could convey  comments - if  either of them felt it was difficult.

I have been dating  on and off  since January this year.... but have had some painful aspects.  I still love my husband so much,,,,, but I know that one can

love two people.  The one you lost and the one you have found.  I have met someone about 6 mths ago who I like a lot and we are getting on  quite well.  Both of us look much better since we had companionship - it obviously shows ... as there have been comments from others about how much better I look now.  My friend also looks much happier -  after a very difficult  journey which  was  affecting his health.  We have to travel  quite a bit to get to see each other.  But  there is a sense of peacefulness. We have quite a lot in common, and  he understands about  the sexual values which others I met did not.  In fact they  behaved very badly and  it was sad and hurtful.    We are just taking it day by day and enjoy what I call Happiness Days.

The days that help to heal the wounds of grief and the  stress  caused by those who do not understand  our pain.  So I think this group is going to be a very interesting one... its the best place to talk and discuss that I have found online or anywhere.  Will be great to hear the new Love stories and still remember the Love of our Lives.  It was Jewish professor  who had been researching  Love of Life marriage and also  found we could love 2 people at the same time.    I had a chat with him ( he lives in Israel) about a year ago.   

Would love to see a wedding photo of you both.   

Blessings  and lots of good wishes

Comment by Damianino! on November 7, 2015 at 12:21pm
Doug you are simply awesome. Due to the mega support I gotvfrom WV when I lost Joan 21March 2014 in a society that expects you to he a man, WV was a saving grace. I there and then pledged to be a member for life...no matter what I may do after loss, I would always be a member. Now you have taken that kinda membership to the next level by creating just the perfect group. I have dated a couple of times and just started another relationship. Its still too early to know how it will end. Doug, you are an inspiration. Keep rising.
Comment by Mary H on November 7, 2015 at 6:13am

Thanks for this Doug, I haven't begun dating yet, but I know that I don't want to live alone for the rest of my life.  I am pushed by my loneliness to want to find somebody and yet I know it would be difficult to remarry even to somebody absolutely great.  I have been thinking about this a lot and will really appreciate the emotional preparation to be gained from the stories of people who have gone before me into braving a new start after heartbreak.

Comment by Debz on November 7, 2015 at 3:49am

Hi Doug and all,

Thanks for the email invite. I haven't even started dating yet. I know that I would like to at some point. So you can all help me avoid the pitfalls! 

Comment by Doug02122014 on October 30, 2015 at 8:17pm

Wow, what started out as a "Big Idea" this morning is now a reality tonight !

I'm a Widower who is still active on Widville and is trying to give back to the new members.  When not helping other newly widowed people, I thought it would be neat to be able to network with other widowed people who are either re-married or are in a committed relationship and are considering marriage after loss of a spouse. 

I just re-married September 26, 2015, to a wonderful lady named Tamela.  Things have been going well, but there have also been some unexpected things come up.  I was curious if other widowed people who have re-married have experienced the same or similar things?  I can't wait to hear what others have experienced.

As other Widville members said in their comments:

Tommi:  "I think we can provide some good info/advice that we wouldn't necessarily be able to give in chat.  Sometimes I don't even mention that I'm remarried in chat.  I'm fearful that it will be too difficult for some to understand.  (I certainly couldn't relate in those early days to ever getting married again!)"  and

barbee:  "I have been very hesitant to share much about it with anyone here in WV because I felt my happiness would seem like gloating and not be received well."

I too hope that our new happiness will not be taken as boasting or gloating but rather this group and it's members will be viewed as examples of what can happen when we work through our grief, and have an attitude of "Never Say Never".

Welcome.

Doug

 

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