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Widowed in 2012

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Comment by laurajay on November 22, 2017 at 6:30pm

Goodoldwine   and 40ford  I'm  with you both!  Hogwash  that it gets easier  or softer  with time. I miss him  more each day that passes.  Jan  19  '18   will be our 50th...God  knows how hard that  will be.  I live for my three young grands. We share  a love that keeps me  going.  Sometimes at night I feel  such a longing hunger  for him  I cannot  believe the pain.  I weep  so deep within I  surprise are not   alone.  It's Thanksgiving  and  we  still are richly  blessed  because   we still love.   Hugs    lj  Where did 5 yrs go?

Comment by Goodoldwine on November 22, 2017 at 5:20pm

I can feel your pain...I also lost my soul mate Nov. 26, 2012 it will be 5 years seams like yesterday....I still cry every day just not as hard or as long.....I try to keep my faith and know I will see her again....we were together for 37 years and married for are not alone I will keep you in my prayers....God Bless you 

Comment by Anne on November 22, 2017 at 12:35pm

40ford.  I am so sorry that you have such pain this year.  I do hope the counseling gives you someone to help you talk so you are not alone in this.  I do hope that you have friends/family to share the holiday and the anniversary of your wife's death with.

Comment by 40ford on November 22, 2017 at 10:00am

It's been a long long time since I wrote anything, but I'm coming up on 5 years (Nov 26) and the weight of this anniversary is a heavy burden. NOTHING has changed in 5 years and the pain is as bad as ever! I've been going to a counselor and I think it helps a little. When a 50+ year relationship ends, it's the lucky one that goes first.  I miss her so so much.

Comment by Frank on November 12, 2017 at 9:13pm

Hi Sue,

I'm sorry to take so long in replying. It's been very busy with my youngest in the hospital.

In writing my comments that evening, I was trying to get my thoughts and feelings down on "paper" so to speak and probably it was not my best prose.  I did not even notice anything in your comments but your concern, and I appreciate that. 




Comment by only1sue on November 2, 2017 at 10:40pm

Frank I entirely missed the fact that your son had died.  I am so sorry.  I didn't mean to trivialise your inability to cope at a friend's funeral.  I am so sorry.

Comment by Frank on November 2, 2017 at 9:25pm

Thank you all for your thoughts and words. They have helped tremendously. 

I mentioned in an earlier post that while some folks choose to remember their loss on the day of their death. Others continue on with Mother's and Father's day.  I choose to remember Susan and our 35 years of marriage by remembering our Anniversary.  As I mentioned in my note,  I got out our wedding album and sat in bed paging through the pictures and as I do, I comment out loud to Susan as if she were sitting beside me.  Instead of her though, my two Attack House Cats jumped up on the bed and lay beside me as I looked through the album.  You know, sometimes I think Susan is pulling their strings!  When I finished, I got up and put the album away, turned out the lights and went to bed.  The cats immediately departed for other parts of the house, and I went to sleep.

Again, Thank You all for your encouragement.



Comment by Mac on October 29, 2017 at 4:05am

Frank, sending good thoughts your way. I'm sorry that you had to deal with so much all at once. 

Comment by only1sue on October 29, 2017 at 2:52am

Frank like any loving father I think God does give us a plateful sometimes.  I find with my pastoral work I can go to three funerals in a row and then not have one to attend for months.  For the first few funerals after I resumed my pastoral care work for the church I found it tough, with Ray's and Mum's death only a few months before.  But now I take each funeral as a farewell visit and am happy to do so.  You have had a tough week, but although you were not able to cope this time next time you may be able to do so.

Comment by princess57 on October 28, 2017 at 10:15pm

Frank, i firmly believe that the Lord from time to time tries and test us, He may give us a full plate but, it u to us on how we wish to handle it. I am so sorry about all your reason losses.  When i think my plate gets full i step back and take small bites or how ever much you can take it.


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