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Latest Activity: Jun 17
My daughter and her fiancé of 9 years broke up this week. He completely blind sided her and she is devastated. She has to tell her son, my grandson. It breaks my heart. He lost his best friend and Grandpa 21 months ago and now in many ways he will lose the man who has been in his life since he was 9 and is now 16. Added to losing Ken I feel like everything is falling apart. They have two hotels that are up for sale and right now its up in the air where she will ultimately move to. I am trying to live one day at a time and not worry about the future. I just turned 70 and while I am adjusting to life without my darling husband in small ways I have such a long way to go. I am so sad
Oh Terry, I am glad for you that you made this decision although it will definitely be an adjustment. I retired 10 days before my husband died as we had many plans. Having open ended time and not having to "be on" can be a real relief. On the other hand, its a lot of open ended hours so I hope and pray your volunteer work and other passions will fill the gap. I am praying for you. Let's keep in touch
Terry, you are both a brave and a compassionate person, and I wish you the very best on your new journey. I completely understand what you mean about the emptiness of "things." We all have to find a way to make life matter to us again, and I look forward to seeing your posts on your way to finding meaning.
Terry I think you are doing what most of us can only dream about doing. For myself after caring for my husband for a year before he died I have a new perspective on life and I have come away from the experience with more empathy for people in general. If I could afford to quit my job and help people I would in a heartbeat. For now I do whatever I can within my means.
Talk about a leap of faith!!! Several times in this group I have mentioned that I am so unhappy with my job that I was very seriously considering giving it up. Since my wife passed, I no longer felt the passion for going into this workplace every day and in fact would feel physically ill as I would walk across the parking lot towards it. I had to have a serious talk with myself and ask myself if it was worth putting myself through this every day. Last week someone asked the question on here, I think it may have been Mary H, if you knew you only had one year to live what would you do. The first thought that came to my mind and it didn't take any thought, was quit my job. So, my goal for the time being is to take a year for myself and see what life brings. I will start to use the knowledge I have gained from my palliative care course and volunteer at a local hospice. I am hoping to discover that I won't need as much financially as I thought I would. I look around me in this house and see lots of 'things' that I was convinced I really needed. As a widower, I found that I was engaging in a lot of 'retail therapy'. Although it felt good at the time, it didn't fill any hole that was left by my wife. If anything, it felt emptier as she was not here to enjoy it with me. So....with a little excitement and a whole lot of fear I will see what this next chapter brings in my life when it begins on April 29. From friends and relatives I am getting a mix of 'I envy you so much' and 'Are you effing nuts quitting a job in this day and age?' All I know is when a job makes you so sick at the thought of doing it every day, it is time to ask yourself if it is worth the sleepless nights, the constant knot in my stomach, the feelings of dread from the time I leave work until it is time to go back. Wish me well everyone:)
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