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Latest Activity: Jun 25
Thank You Victoria... and I am also so sorry for the recent loss of your husband. Time means nothing right now. Days turn to nights and back to days again and my emotions are all over the map. Yesterday was a "bed" day. Thankfully I have no demands being made upon me and I have a close girlfriend and my grown children near me right now to ease any household demands I may have. I laid in my "womb" all day. Today I am up and trying to do some dishes, have a shower and need to go out and face some of the "business" again. Ugh! Truly the last thing I want to do but I know Jim would want me to "get 'er done" although I laugh a little inside imagining him trying to do these things if the roles were reversed. 28 days today. Feels like yesterday... everyday. 2 phone calls yesterday from men who worked with him. Grown men I have never met, sobbing with me, extending themselves to help me with anything to honour their mentor and friend who they miss so much. There is comfort there as they tell me how much he loved me, how he was always sharing stories of our adventures and our dreams and how he was looking forward to growing old with me. There is comfort but it is so hard too. It just seems so HUGE... like the Man he was and the legacy he has left behind. I miss him sooo... Not sure where I'm going now :(
I am so new at this. Not new to loss as such... but new to THIS loss. On January 29th my whole life did a 180. In a heartbeat. Didn't see this coming at all. I have been sludging through what feels like quicksand for the last...ummmm...27 days. Baby steps. Still have the moments when I feel I've been kicked in the solar plexus and I gasp for breath. Do I even want to keep breathing?? Chaos, panic, anxiety. I am doing all I can to honour this amazing Man who shared my life for too short a time. I have bad days and then I have worse days. The earth keeps turning and I am dragging reluctantly behind her... I know I will get through this. I just wonder who I am meant to be when the dust settles. Mind totally blown. I appreciate a place to express these feelings. Thank You.
(Victoria) im so sorry for your loss. I understand some what of what you are going through my husband passed tragically on jan 30th and I got my answers this last Wednesday. The days dragged so bad up until that day, it did help a little once I got my answer but still not easy. I will keep you and your children in my thoughts please feel free to message me. I also have a 6 year old its extremely hard with kids.
I'm sorry, (((Victoria))). Just hold on and know that we all have been there and listen to the other widows for your hope. People at home and people online can hold your hand while you walk or even fall down for a while. It's OK to feel broken. You don't know how you will get through it but you will.
It has only been two months for me. My husband died suddenly December 19. I was crying at everything, all the time, a month ago. Now it is slightly better. Some days I am crying only 2 or 3 times in the day, and other days it is every few minutes all day. But it is not so relentless as it was.
I felt like I was dead, too, when my Tom died. But I'm still here. My old life stopped, and I didn't want this new one, but it's happening anyway. Remember your husband would want you to heal and be there for your kids.
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