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Comment by MSDean on February 23, 2016 at 2:58pm

My husband died on Jan 16th from a severe case of pancreatitis  that caused a whole bunch of problems.  He was in the ICU for a month and hospice for 7 days.  We were married for 3 1/2 years.  He died at 42.  I was his caregiver for many years due to an car accident that left him paralyzed.  So when he died I lost my precious husband, my income, my apartment and my own health.  It is really hard having to start over it seems like from rock bottom.  Life really can be unfair.  It is hard every day to find purpose again.

Comment by Sue on February 23, 2016 at 10:43am

My husband died Jan. 14th. Diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in June of 2015 followed by a nightmare of a battle for eight months. He was 44. We'd been married 13 years, 14 next month. We were never able to have children. I was several years older than him. This was so messed up. It should have happened to me. He would have survived losing me so much better. he could have remarried, maybe even had children. I have to go back to work next week. No idea how to that. I'm just in a really bad place right now. I guess everybody on here is though.

Comment by KayeL on February 11, 2016 at 12:12pm

I want to scream out loud because I miss my husband. I am in so much pain. Every day my thought about ending my life grows stronger day after day. I abstain from taking any food and drinks. The cremains of my husband was finally rest in peace yesterday, I held off the inurnment week after week. I miss the tenderness and love he used to give me every day. I hate talking to the air as I feel like I am half crazy.

Comment by KayeL on February 9, 2016 at 8:14am

I won't take my life but I am very welcome death if that makes sense. He will be in good hands if something ever happen to me. I miss my husband too much... He was always my number 1 priority even our son can't take away his #1 spot.

Comment by Lostwithoutyou<3 on February 9, 2016 at 7:38am

I feel the same way but you wouldn't want to leave your son behind, would you?

Comment by KayeL on February 9, 2016 at 6:51am

I miss my husband too much. He was my bff, my soul mate, my support, my son's most loving father, and the best husband. These few weeks I constantly thinking about dying so I could go with him. I have too much worries. Why didn't God take my life away as well?

Comment by AwaitingtheResurrection on February 6, 2016 at 1:39am

Hello. I'm Nisha. I'm 43. I lost my husband on New Year's Eve, so I'm not sure which year to post in.

Ken was 43. He died unexpectedly, at home. We would have been married 25 years this September.

We have 3 children. 1 grown, and a 12 and 4 year old.

Comment by KayeL on February 2, 2016 at 10:04pm

My in-laws and his sister are very supportive on me moving on. Bottom line, they worry about our son. I don't think I will actively looking but if I meet someone who will love my son and that I find I could connect with him on important values and some basic attraction, I might consider moving on as an option. I told my in-laws I will be forever their daughter and will take care of them so deep down I know I am my hubby's wife forever. Only I hold having a family is very important to me. If I were without a child, i'd totally stay single, but with a young son, he deserves a better chancew of having a father. If the right person comes along and my guts feeling tells me to go ahead then I might. I have always beem lucky in love, I hope God will provide. But later, not right now. I am still feeling head over heels over my loving hubby.

Comment by Kathryn1 on February 1, 2016 at 1:48pm

Hi KayeL, i agree its hard to find others in the same age group. My husband's health journey is a bit similar. He had stomach pain for only a few weeks, when on Dec 24 he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer that had spread to his liver and lungs. We never even had any followup with any specialists, he came home and passed away at home 16 days later. It was horrific. We don't have kids, but we do have a large dog. I am still barely out of bed. Family is staying with me now. My husband said the same thing before he passed, he wanted me to do anything to be happy. But we were so happy and he was my soulmate, i know in my heart i will never want someone else

Comment by KayeL on February 1, 2016 at 1:04pm

Hi kathryn1!

I am sorry to hear that. I just sent you a friend request. I need to reach out to more people around my age... I am dying to talk to different people. Hopefully we could support each other throughout this difficult time. *HUGS*

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