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This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

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Widowed in 2019

We're so sorry you have a reason to join us. Please get acquainted here and make friends anywhere on the site.

Check the 'Help' tab for more guidance or send questions to [email protected]

We are grateful you found us so soon after your loss, but until this group grows please feel free to also join the Widowed in 2018.

Members: 85
Latest Activity: Sep 29

Discussion Forum

Lost

Started by Judyrose. Last reply by Mary Sep 29. 18 Replies

It’s been 3 months for me. It is the worst feeling in my life. Some days I think he’s coming back then I realize he’s not and have a breakdown. We were married for 48 years and I don’t like being…Continue

5 weeks and counting i

Started by Jules. Last reply by Jules Sep 19. 7 Replies

it’s been 5 weeks since my extremely healthy, active 64 year old husband passed away in his sleep. I have so much pain and so many tears and so many questions. How can his happen to a healthy, active…Continue

3 MONTHS AFTER

Started by Ozzy turtle. Last reply by Jules Sep 18. 12 Replies

On April 2nd it was exactly 3 months since I lost my husband, my best friend. It was just him and I. We have close friends that have stayed close to me, but it seems like everyone has disappeared. It…Continue

So many places to say goodbye

Started by DebiT. Last reply by AandC Sep 16. 2 Replies

It’s been just over 6 months, and I may be just beginning to understand why so much is so hard.  I function pretty well in my normal routine of work and visiting grandkids monthly down south.  It…Continue

Comment Wall

Comment

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Comment by Darlene on September 8, 2019 at 12:20pm

Thank you Pat, I will pray for you as well. It really does feel like it is getting harder. I am very grateful for having found this group. Just knowing there are others that understand helps.

Comment by Babycakes1993 on September 8, 2019 at 11:32am

Hi everyone I'm new to widow village. My fiancé Daniel passed away Dec 2nd, 2018. We have two children together a 2 year old son and 3 year old daughter. My children were with me when I found the love of my life dead in our living room. He died the day before his 25th birthday. It was totally unexpected he passed away due to multiple psychiatric drug toxicity that caused respiratory depression. He was overmedicated by his psychiatrist. We were to be wed 3 months later. 

Comment by Pat in Ct on September 8, 2019 at 10:18am

Darlene, Three months is when the extreme sadness, desperation, hopelessness, and anxiety hit me, too. I guess we were in shock before then. My husband died on May 15 and it's getting harder, not easier. I'll say a prayer for you.

Comment by AandC on September 8, 2019 at 3:41am

It is a tough and lonely road to follow when the man you were supposed to spend your life with suddenly dies. July 27, 2019 was when it happened, when my future became blank, and I felt as though everything was crushing me in. I still don't know what my future holds. I can't see it any more. I miss my husband dearly. I'm happy to have found this site to allow me to communicate with others who know what I am feeling. 

Cher

Comment by Mary on August 31, 2019 at 9:31am

Pualili221,

Thanks for your kind words.  It does help to come here and read what others have written.  So many things really hit home.  I think losing your spouse/partner is so much more difficult than you can ever imagine unless you've been thru it.

Mary

Comment by Pualili221 on August 29, 2019 at 2:52pm

@ Sueg, @ Mary, @ Morales, 

So sorry about your loss. It sucks that we are all on this website and have become a part of this "community" that we never would have imagined to be in at the present moment. As much as it sucks, reading what everyone posts has helped me get through some dark days.  To this day I still have a hard time comprehending the death of my husband.  Everyone on here knows that this is the hardest journey we all have to go through; they are here to listen, tell their stories and be supportive.  I hope that you all find the comfort and strength that you need to get you through the really tough times. Hugs to you...

Comment by Morales on August 28, 2019 at 10:05pm

Hello I'm new here. I lost my husband June 10, 2019. Unexpectedly, waiting for Autopsy results. He wasn't even home, I had called his phone and LAPD answered his phone to give me this devastating news. I'm having a real hard time tonight. I have good hours and not so good hours. 

Comment by Mary on August 27, 2019 at 4:53pm

Hi,

I'm new here also but have been reading posts for a few months.  My husband died in March.  I feel like it's getting harder and harder.  Some days I just can't get motivated to do anything.  I really can't believe he's gone.  We were both retired and did everything together.  It's so hard not having someone to plan things with - even little things like what we're going to do today.

I have gone twice to a widows support group but don't know if I'll continue or not.  The women were all very nice, but I just don't know if it's really going to help.

Sueg, I can relate to the lawnmower incident.  I don't have a clue about using most of the yard equipment.  My son is here every other week and uses the riding mower, but in between, I struggle with the self-propelled one.  That's about all I can handle right now. 

So much of what everyone has written sounds exactly like how I feel.  There is nothing to look forward to anymore.  No plans for the future.

Comment by Sueg on August 23, 2019 at 6:26pm

I am new to Soaring Spirits and not very computer savvy either.

My husband, Tom passed away on July 14th, 2019 and I thought it was hard to care for him, but nothing compares to the sadness and loneliness I feel.  I try to keep busy but at times the sadness is overwhelming. 

I tried to start the riding lawn mower today because Tom always took such pride in how our place looked and a couple weeks before he died, he showed me how to use the riding mower.  Today I tried but I think I flooded the mower.  I feel so lost.  I feel so incompetent and I wish I would have paid more attention when he was showing me.  I just miss him so much.  

Comment by BA7.5 on August 22, 2019 at 9:58pm

Hi Hilda--

I hope you get this message.  Somehow I don't find your message on the group comment wall...

I completely understand EVERYTHING you said in your message.  My husband died 6 months ago last week... I miss him like crazy... Every night when I try to go to sleep I look at his pictures and tell him that I hope that SOMEHOW he'll be here when I wake up.  How crazy is that as I have his ashes sitting right here.  But I can hope...

We have a grown step daughter, but none of our own.  I just turned 60, without my husband... I have no idea what the future will bring either, and really have no desire to do anything at this point.  I am just empty.  My goal is to get out of bed in the morning, get outside for some exercise as it's what keeps me going, then put one foot in front of the other for the rest of the day.  It's always a roller coaster-- I never know if i'll be on the upside or downside.  But I do know that it will reset every day... I've always been a very upbeat, energetic, positive person so it's so odd to be so empty and without purpose... My husband and our time together was so much of my purpose.  Workwise, my passion has died to run my business... 

I'm sorry to be talking so much about me and where I am, but I've found on Widowed Village that it helps SO much to hear other people's stories so I know I am not alone in all of this.  Know that you are not alone either.  We are all here to listen and care, because we get it.

I send virtual hugs your way.  

BA7.5

 

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