My husband's family for the most part has avoided contact with me and our two girls from probably about a week before he passed away. My husband has one brother and his family that are being kind…Continue
Yesterday was the one month mark that Richard went to heaven. I had a good day considering, smugly thinking I've finally gotten past the point of crying all day long or at the drop of a hat. Well today not sitting smugly. I was at work and all of a sudden this overwhelming grief washed over me like a rogue wave. The rest of the day was spent struggling to get my work done and not fall apart. A few days ago, I promised to watch my grandson tonight. Now I am re-thinking that decision. I…Continue
Trying to handle credit card bills not in my name. My hair wants to stand on end. How hard is it to work with someone really? They are turning it over to their debt collection since he has no estate. Regardless of the fact payments are still being made. I hate wading thru the mumbo jumbo of stuff. Do I want to take on the debt? Uhhhh no. Always got to hold out if I have to file bankruptcy. I am trying to make things work for me and them involved as well. Oh well I tried. I can't…Continue
I just feel weak and worn out. Exhausted and I really don't like this new step in the path.
If I were told I had Stage IV cancer of any sort I'd ask for a pain pump and let me go - the sooner the better.
The girls while still in the teens, they have boyfriends and things going on with their lives. Today was a bad taste of what it will be like without them too. Amber went with her boyfriend to a wedding and Shelby went with her boyfriend somewhere. I had my grandson, Eli…Continue
This is only the second weekend without Richard. Last night our eldest daughter Shelby asked me if I could watch her 17 month old son for the weekend so she could go spend the weekend with her boyfriend. Why didn't I just say no - - - what about me? The girls lives they can fill with friends and boyfriends to help. Shelby told my youngest daughter that she thought my crying was "over the top". Frankly I don't feel like doing anything for her. She was not here for the majority of his…Continue