"I agree. I've been wondering how to preserve my husband's legacy. I don't like the fact that people (including family) don't include or say his name ever.
I like your idea of running a donor-advised fund…"
"To live in the moment you have to force yourself to THINK because your brain can't think of two things at once. Try talking out loud (I know that sounds funny) but try to focus on just one thing.....I've even heard to yell…"
Thanks for responding to me! I think this happens to a lot of people.....
Did you ever try breathing? Inhale for 4 counts and exhale for 5. I also try to live in the MOMENT. Don't think ahead! …"
"Broken Diva, you responded to my posts about the holidays and also about anxiety. We seem to have a lot in common on this journey, and I so need someone to talk to. I sent a friend request, but I can't find anywhere on the…"
"YES! I thought it was supposed to get better with time??? I am finding that is NOT the case. Wonder why it seems worse now?
And people and family do not understand! They don't even talk about him anymore...and don't…"
You are definitely not alone! It's been five years since my husband died suddenly and I still have anxiety! I wake up tired, do you? The anxiety is horrible in the early morning and wakes me up. I do take…"
I agree with everyone below. Don't do anything you don't want to do. And try to anticipate things that will trigger your sadness. For me it was music, I couldn;t listen to Christmas songs or look at…"
"OMG Brianne! Our paths do seem similar! I am so happy and grateful you responded to me!
Unbelievable. I do believe what we went through made us stronger women today!
God bless you and I am so glad you found happiness again.
Thanks for your response. I am trying to understand and go through the process of grief more and more. And, actually, thanks to you and the other responses on here, feel I am doing a good job. And I thank my husband for helping…"
Good for you that it worked out, but some people grieve differently. Glad you can enjoy every day, but some people cannot. For those like that, I pray that you will and never give up hope. I can't just erase my…"
I feel like the five year mark has hit me hard too. It will be five years this Friday. No one seems to acknowledge it anymore -- not even my family! I haven't forgotten though...Has this happened to anyone…"
It's like I wrote your post! I can' believe it either - that people are hurt at MY behavior!
My husband died at the end of October and my brother and his family wanted to come to MY house because my mother lives with me…"
So sorry you are new to this "Club." I never wanted to be a member.
I know what you mean about stupid people. I have disassociated with so many "friends" over my husband's death, including my…"
Broken Diva, you responded to my posts about the holidays and also about anxiety. We seem to have a lot in common on this journey, and I so need someone to talk to. I sent a friend request, but I can't find anywhere on the "request sent" page to message you. I too have ruminating thoughts about my husband. He died suddenly and totally unexpectedly almost 4 years ago. Please, if you can, let me know if you would consider communicating with me.
You know what I was irritated about the most? People telling me that I will get through this and find love again. "You are young and you have the rest of your life ahead of you. I know you loved him, but you will find love again."
Say what?!! how do they know what I need? Who designated these people to determine what happens in MY life? It just makes me so angry that they would brush off what we meant to each other without a second thought. Most of my friends tell me that those people are talking because they don't know what else to do or say. They just yammer on and on to make themselves feel more comfortable about an uncomfortable subject.
I think about my husband every day......he is the white noise in my head when I am not concentrating on anything else. So I do believe that you are having visions. In fact, I am a little jealous that you have such vivid thoughts and i have not been able to do that. I even prayed for him to come to me in my dreams. He used to have such vivid, realistic dreams that he would tell me about. It was comical, almost like a made for TV movie script at times!
I understand how you feel and it has been 408 days for me and I cry myself to sleep 5 out of 7 days a week.