"Dear Tekwriter, it has been 5-1/2 years since losing my DH. My sister and one sister-in-law did not show up for either my husbands funeral or the visitation prior. Several long-time friends also did not pay respects or even contact me…"
"My dear Riet, I also find it difficult to attend some anniversary and birthday celebrations knowing Bill can have no more birthdays and we will have no more anniversaries. I try to attend but I find it depends on the demeanour of the hosts…"
"The start of a new year is depressing for me. Another long year to get through without my dear husband. And, Canadian winter January through March is cold, dark, snowy, icy and bleak. Christmas was easier this time, our 6th without him,…"
"Today is my birthday. Bill always made sure there was cake and a nice meal, and the kids were here. I’m alone today because I’ve come down with a cold & cough and don’t want anyone else to get it 12 days before Christmas.…"
"Congratulations Shelley on using your critical thinking skills to assess your current situation, feelings and determine your future needs both physically and emotionally. It’s great that you had a friend to discuss this with and act as a…"
"Dear Shelley, I agree it would be best to hold off on making big decisions a while longer. Grief counseling advised to wait 2 years if possible. It’s been 5 years since my DH passed, the first 2 were a complete fog and I found…"
"Dear chef John, thank you for your poignant, thoughtful and heartfelt post. I’m at the 5 yr mark and your words ring all the notes of our “ever-after” journey so accurately. I do hope those in the early days/months find…"
"To Riet, TP, Allan, LP and others facing the first holiday season without your partner/spouse - there’s no doubt the next couple of months will be difficult for the heart to navigate. We are here for support and I hope you will not…"
"Christmas has never been the same for me either. The first one, 3 months after his passing we had a terrible ice storm and my home was without power for 5 days and utilities for 10 (cable,internet,phone). I couch surfed at my kids homes until…"
"Dear Riet, the first 2 years are most difficult because grief is so deep for us and others can’t possibly understand unless they have experienced same. Even some family members still avoid me after 5 years and I assume they just…"
"Sept 1 was the 5th anniversary for me, widowed at 58. As my friends and family continue celebrating anniversaries I will never have, and birthdays my husband didn’t live to see the enormity of his loss deepens every year. I have…"
"Thanks NoLongerInBerlin for the “husband shelter” visual description, it made me laugh. I joined a widows group about 2 years ago; we didn’t discourage widower men from joining but there were only 2 who showed up to a couple…"
"Susan - I retired January 1st this year. My DH passed away 5 years ago this month. It was a huge decision and I thought about it for 2 years. It turned out to be the best decision for me, as like you my workplace was undergoing huge…"
"Wearing your wedding rings is strictly a personal choice. The 5th anniversary is coming up September 1st for me and I still wear mine. Everyone should do what is right for them. There is no time limit, no right or wrong. I know ladies who wore their…"
"Hi everyone. These posts remind me of my return to work after bereavement leave when my husband died 4.5 yrs ago. My third week back I was attending a retirement dinner for my boss, and while at the table in front of 7-8 others one of my…"
"Athena thanks for sharing your similar experience, i appreciate the effort it takes to relive our spouses last hours. I guess because we were together every day during the 14 months of his illness, and it was so intense to live through this…"
Welcome to Widville, CarLady. I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here.
Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Ask here! You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place. I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville. Take care of yourself.