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DIVA70
  • Female
  • Matteson, IL
  • United States
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  • Patience
 

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DIVA70 commented on Rainy (Misty)'s video
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Donna Taggart - Jealous Of The Angels (Official Music Video)

"WOW! BEAUTIFUL.....but here come the waterfalls.....I don't question God but the pain is real!"
23 hours ago
DIVA70 replied to Luv4Z's discussion Crying in the front lawn
"It does get to be overwhelming. I lost the love of my life (47 years married, 50 years together) on April 29th....that's less than two months.....I know I was just in remote control the first two weeks....luckily I had my two adult children…"
yesterday
DIVA70 posted a blog post

Fathers Day

WELL, My Dearest,             We made it....our first Fathers Day without you! I have to admit I was a basket case the days leading up to Sunday. Generally, the kids and I would be wrapped up in getting you that "perfect" gift. This year I was going to get you that new recliner you always wanted....your Pammie was sure to get daddy something special and of course Howard was the one to get you something funny. Kevin, our oldest always was the first to call and the grandkids jumped with joy…See More
yesterday
riet left a comment for DIVA70
"Dear Diva, Reading your post, it struck me how close your experiences are similar to mine.  My husband died on the 20th of last April. He was suffering from braincancer.  He fought against it for 4 years with every force in him. He wanted…"
Friday
DIVA70 commented on Mrs Bear's blog post Infinity and beyond
"This is beautiful! On April 29 I lost my soulmate, my knight in shining armor, my prince charming. We had 50 wonderful years together. We endured the good, the bad and the ugly together. We experienced miscarriages, job losses, and physical…"
Jun 13
DIVA70 commented on Rainy (Misty)'s blog post We are called survivors
"Thank you....it has been a little over a month since my Tony left and it has been a roller coaster. After 47 years I still cant believe he's gone. This may seem silly but my first "hurdle" actually had to do with the lawn. I was…"
Jun 6
Rainy (Misty) left a comment for DIVA70
"Hi Diva, I noticed you on my blog and chked to see if you were new here.  I see that you are, WELCOME!  I'm so very sorry you've had to join us.  The struggle is real but not impossible.  I hope you'll find…"
Jun 6
Patience left a comment for DIVA70
"Welcome to Widville, Diva70.I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here.Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Click the "help" link at the top of page. You can join the…"
Jun 4

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DIVA70's Blog

Fathers Day

Posted on June 18, 2018 at 9:48am 0 Comments

WELL, My Dearest,

             We made it....our first Fathers Day without you! I have to admit I was a basket case the days leading up to Sunday. Generally, the kids and I would be wrapped up in getting you that "perfect" gift. This year I was going to get you that new recliner you always wanted....your Pammie was sure to get daddy something special and of course Howard was the one to get you something funny. Kevin, our oldest always was the first to call and the grandkids jumped…

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At 9:44am on June 15, 2018, riet said…

Dear Diva,

Reading your post, it struck me how close your experiences are similar to mine.  My husband died on the 20th of last April. He was suffering from braincancer.  He fought against it for 4 years with every force in him. He wanted to live and live and live.  He was my soulmate, my best friend, my love for almost 50 years.  We met when I was 15 and he was 23. 

The opposition from both our communities even brought us together more strongly as ever.

We have 3 children and 3 grandchildren who miss their dad and grandpa terribly. My dear husband lived for me and his family.

And as in the poem: he was my North, my South, my East and West, I thought it would last forever and I was wrong.

I still can't cope with his dead. There are times I just scream his name and hope he will hear it.  Or I close my eyes and pretend he is standing next to me. 

How do you manage to go on with your recent terrible loss?

I  thought I was prepared because of the grief we had before he died. The cancer had destroyed almost all functions of his body. He was almost completely paralyzed. He lost almost completely his speech and his sight. And still he wanted to battle till the last day.

He didn't want to return to a hospital or a hospice, so with the help of our daughter who nursed him every day in the last month, he could stay and pass away in our home. 

I miss him so very much.  And just like you, I melt down sometimes. In places we went together,  hearing a song we both liked, seeing the flowers he planted last year.

And I am so angry sometimes. The thought I never never see him again, is unbearable to me.  We never can share any jokes, or any memories no more .

People keep telling me this will change . At this moment I don't see that.  I only want to get those horrible last months out of my mind.  I want to see my darling as he was before this disease entered in our life. Before he was so dependent on help.

But it is difficult to find again my caring, creative, lovely husband again. I have to watch old photos to see this.

You experience this for about the same time as me .

So I wanted to say hello to you .

All the best to you

Riet

At 9:20am on June 6, 2018, Rainy (Misty) said…

Hi Diva, I noticed you on my blog and chked to see if you were new here.  I see that you are, WELCOME!  I'm so very sorry you've had to join us.  The struggle is real but not impossible.  I hope you'll find courage, strength and companionship here, just as I have. 

At 8:26am on June 4, 2018, Patience said…

Welcome to Widville, Diva70.I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here.
Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Click the "help" link at the top of page. You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. And the "chat room" is open 24/7.
Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place. I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville. Take care of yourself.

 
 
 

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