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FindingMe ( Joette)
  • Female
  • Pawtucket, RI
  • United States
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I am 49 years old..and recently lost my husband ( June 14th) due to a Tragic Freak Accident. Life as I have known it for close to 30 years ( I was 19 and Him 30 when we married) has changed in a way I NEVER knew possible. We have 3 Children...Ages 33, 27 and 26....4 Grand Children, ages 7, 4, 1, 1, and another on way In December! I never pictured my life being part of a group such as this, as I am sure NONE of you did either. Im sorry for ALL who have lost someone..The pain is beyond words and so overwhelming at times it takes my breath away. I'm hoping to find some comfort ( as much as can even be possible under the circumstances) and speak with others, since I feel so alone on this horrific Journey called "grief"

FindingMe ( Joette)'s Blog

Feeling Lost

Posted on August 17, 2014 at 7:21am 8 Comments

 I am 49 years old....My husband Frank was 58 when he died due t a freak Accident ( passed out and fell on the Kitchen floor causing a Brain Bleed) on June 14th that took his life. I had to be the one to make the FINAL decision to take him off Life support after two days being in a Coma due to a Fall that caused a SEVERE BRAIN INJURY that required 4 hours of Brain Surgery, he survived the Surgery, next day he had MULTIPLE STROKES to the Right side of the Brain and a few to the left...I was…


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At 5:54pm on January 31, 2015, detour said…

Hi Joette, I just read your August post of your dear husband,  I am so sorry for your loss

I can't imagine how tough that decision was. You did all you could for him. I can only relate in that for me it has been over 8 weeks since i lost my sweet wife of 23 years. The lost we feel is so great, Moving forward seems so difficult and yet we must do it somehow.

At 11:23am on January 11, 2015, KATO said…
n January 11, 2015, KATO said…
Hello Joette, reading your story was very touching. Just similar to mine. My husband was murdered while at work. He substained severe head injury according to Drs. They tried to revive him but d wound affected his brain. They put him on life support to see if there cld be a miracle but no way. After several attempt they decided to put off d life support. It was not easy even till now. Just three and half years in marriage with two young daughters 2 and half year, and 1 year 3 months then. Now they are 6 and 5 years. Though years goes by but it is still like yesterday. Had to comprehend it.

Happy to have find this organisation where l can share, chat, learn and confide in someone. Knowing dat l am not alone in this situation.
At 1:49pm on December 9, 2014, Dogwood said…
Hi Joette, thanks for sending me a friend request, so sorry for your loss, and for the heart wrenching decision you had to make for your husband. I hope that you will come to find peace with your decision to allow your husband to have his pain treated. If it's any comfort, I can't imagine anyone wanting their loved one to choose the other option for them. This is why we are entrusted with that responsibility. The kind of love it takes to make that decision transcends our own desires to have them with us at any cost. I cared for my husband during his long battle with cancer, and as the end neared, I told him that my greatest fear was to make a wrong decision, or not understand what he wanted me to do, when he became unable to communicate with me. I, too, have some lingering questions about his final night, but only about whether I was able to address his comfort and pain issues well enough. For what it is worth, I have NO doubt that you chose correctly. You have my support and admiration. I hope you find peace with it. (I lost my husband in January.)
At 10:04am on August 9, 2014, Doug02122014 said…
I'm sorry for your loss. Welcome to this group none of us ever dreamt we would be a member of. That statement just feels so wrong to ever say to another person. Since we cannot change the past the only thing left to do is decide how we are going to write our futures. My wife of 19-yrs. passed 2-12-2014, of a long term illness. I have 2-daughters (17 & 14) and the oldest is Autistic nonverbal. I'm a little over 6-months out and have experienced many aspects of grief and have many more to learn about. I've recently seen a few good days which I can attribute to a new woman in my life. I'll be doing a blog on this unexpected twist in my life soon. If you or any other members reading this need someone to listen to or have questions I'm available for everyone. I see this community as a give and take group. I received soo much care and support when I first landed here I think I'm at a place where I can return the favor or pay it forward now. I may not have all the answers but I know a lot of people on widville and may be able to network you to someone who can help.

Glad you found us.

At 1:10pm on August 8, 2014, Maria Louisa said…

Welcome Joette - I am so sorry you had to join this "club" - but since we can't change that, I am happy you will find lots of support here for this journey...

At 4:21pm on August 7, 2014, LifesAJourney said…

Welcome to Widowed Village. I am very sorry for your loss, but pleased that you found us. You will find caring support and friendship here.

Here is the best place to start: Need help using the site? Ask here! You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you will find meaningful conversations taking place.  I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville.


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