"Tekwriter - no - there is no “have to” about anything! You do what you feel the need to do.
i will wear the ring Chris placed in my finger for the rest of my life. I wear it in his honour and in the memory of twenty-three…"
"Gary's wife, death is such a mystery.
I can understand the despair of those like Melissa who were not present when their spouses died. The anguish must be unimaginable. But death is such a mystery that even when you are there, it is difficult…"
"Mike, you put it beautifully. Some say to me, “But (and it’s always ‘but’) you had such a happy marriage! The not so subtle subtext is ‘you have no right to be sad’. But I am sad, precisely because I lost so much.…"
"Machu Picchu was one of the places on my dream list and Chris and I got there in 2007. I had wanted to see it since grade school Spanish class and it didn’t disappoint!
He and I got to almost all our dream places (his top was to come within…"
"This is the place to say the unsayable. Sometimes it helps to say it just to lift the burden a bit. But you can’t say it to the non-bereaved. I know how crass it sounds to others, and it’s especially hard for me to say to a friend whose…"
"Yes I know now what it’s like not to be anyone’s great love anymore. I have a lovely stepdaughter and her two children who call me Nana, but my own parents are long gone and my sister and friends all have their own “number…"
"Mswizard, we here understand how awful it is to lose a partner. It is truly a different world we enter once we suffer that loss, and we grope our way along. And e each may feel alone in our home lives if we’d haven’t got close…"
"Thanks, no longerinbergen. It’s odd that some things I can listen to, like the opera and classical we enjoyed together, But going places, like the folk festival, is still hard. I think it was hard to be there alone. I had gone to see…"
"I tried to go the Cambridge Folk Festival today. I had bought tickets months ago before I lost my husband. None of the friends who usually come could make it this year, but I thought I’d go anyway. My mistake was that I hadn’t remembered…"
"Riet, I’d like to congratulate you on your happy marriage- no one can take that or the memories away from you. Love really doesn’t end, it lives on in you. So keep those happy memories close, but when the painful ones come, let them…"
I ‘welcome” you to the club that no one wants to join, but we really do welcome you with warmth and understanding here.
What you describe is normal and we all go through it. It is early days for you and…"
" Melissa, I’m glad the reception is at home, because it is really important to have a space you can escape to when it gets too much. If I haven’t got “safe place” to retreat to, then, I find, it’s more likely…"
"I know they wouldn’t want us to feel sad, but we do feel sad. And that is allowed.
next year I turn 60 and friends of mine of the same vintage all want to “celebrate”. While I’d like to celebrate their birthdays, I…"
Welcome to Widville, LP. I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here. Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Click the "help" link at the top of page. You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. And the "chat room" is open 24/7. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place. I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville. Take care of yourself.