"October 15th - it's my darling Chris' birthday today. I got thought my birthday, our wedding anniversary OK-ish, but this one is really awful. It's raining hard outside and all I want to do is curl up in bed with the cat and dog. But…"
"Absolutely normal. I doubt there is anyone here who hasn’t done the same on passing milestones. It’s not been long at all I’m any case.
C’ Birthday is next Monday. I have to work that day but I have my darling…"
"Beautiful words, Shelley. I know what you mean. Sometimes I can imagine Chris walking next to me holding my hand and I find myself smiling.
I managed to get through my wedding anniversary this week, the first without Chris. The grief…"
"Thanks, Irishlady and Susan, weekends are really the worst. Before, it was just Chris and I pottering about at home and relaxing after a week at work. I still have work, so now I -weirdly- look forward to Mondays! How perverse is…"
"Does anyone else have days like this? Sunday- I get up late, distract myself, cry, distract myself some more with ‘busyness’, walk the dog, have a glass of wine and some cheese, take a sleeping pill so I can go to bed early and get…"
"All of us here recognise that- the pointlessness of everything, the. Absoluteness of death, how the one thing we want more than anything - the return of our loved one - will never come true. It is all so very painful, and the feeling of loss…"
"Talking to my husband is very comforting. I do it all the time. I don’t care who thinks I’m crazy- I do whatever gets me through the day. I talk to his pictures, I talk to him as though he were standing next to me, and it helps me…"
This is so recent for you. All of us here know just how awful the pain is. But you will get through although it’s really the toughest thing you’ll ever do. The only advice I can give is to cry as much and as loudly as you need…"
"Thank you Shelley. I kissed my husband too, and kept him withmwallnoght, holding his hand. I was glad I did that. Even though his hand was cold, his arm was finally limp- his neurological illness had caused his limbs to go stiff so that he…"
"My 59th birthday today and the first without C in 23 years. In 6 days it’ll be six months since he died. Everything has changed. Next month is our wedding anniversary and the month after that, C’s birthday. I’m just Trying to…"
"Tekwriter - no - there is no “have to” about anything! You do what you feel the need to do.
i will wear the ring Chris placed in my finger for the rest of my life. I wear it in his honour and in the memory of twenty-three…"
"Gary's wife, death is such a mystery.
I can understand the despair of those like Melissa who were not present when their spouses died. The anguish must be unimaginable. But death is such a mystery that even when you are there, it is difficult…"
"Mike, you put it beautifully. Some say to me, “But (and it’s always ‘but’) you had such a happy marriage! The not so subtle subtext is ‘you have no right to be sad’. But I am sad, precisely because I lost so much.…"
"Machu Picchu was one of the places on my dream list and Chris and I got there in 2007. I had wanted to see it since grade school Spanish class and it didn’t disappoint!
He and I got to almost all our dream places (his top was to come within…"
"This is the place to say the unsayable. Sometimes it helps to say it just to lift the burden a bit. But you can’t say it to the non-bereaved. I know how crass it sounds to others, and it’s especially hard for me to say to a friend whose…"
Welcome to Widville, LP. I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here. Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Click the "help" link at the top of page. You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. And the "chat room" is open 24/7. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place. I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville. Take care of yourself.