Saw your post about going to heaven, yes, I feel the same. I am 36 lost my dear hubby on 1/6/16 to cancer. He was 40. Was fit and healthy, who could have thought. Lately I only want to die and go see him soon. Not taking my own life of course but just want death to come find me. I am, too, heartbroken. We were still very much in love after spending 15 years together since college. :/
So sorry for the reason you’re here but glad that you’ve joined us. You’ll find insight, understanding and support here at Widowed Village. We’re traveling the same journey together some further down the road than others. Join a group when you’re ready to get better connected. Participate in a forum and/or chat anytime. If you have questions, feel free to ask. There is always someone around willing to help. Following is a link that you might find helpful as a new member.