Well, they say it gets easier. I wish I knew, if that were true. It’s almost been five months now, and it still doesn’t even seem real. I find my mind wandering, in a fog, just not even functioning at all. I guess if I were to take a poll, people would think that it looks like it’s getting easier, easier than it was 3 months ago at least. Every day, I miss him. Every day, I miss Ericka. I shut my eyes and I imagine them as they were, Ericka in Washington, Rick in his chair. They visit me in…Continue
When will I stop counting the days?
Loneliness seems deeper daily. I miss Rick. I miss Erica. Apparently this is the new normal.
I’m trying to find joy, but it’s so hard. I know this will never be easy, people say it will get easier. I think I would be happy with just easier. Each day seems to last forever. I’m looking for an escape route. But there isn’t one. I don’t ever wanna forget, I just wanna be able to get through the day without crying. They say if you hold your…Continue
I wish I could get off this roller coaster,
I wish I could get off this ride.
I wish I could get a refund.
You will be just fine - they lied.
Or maybe this is a merry-go-round,
At this point I’m just not sure.
My fear is that it’s only begun,
And my existence is just a blur.