This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

  • 48, Male
  • Edgewood, NM
  • United States
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NMWidower's Friends

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NMWidower's Discussions

Encouragement for those walking in the early months of grief

Started this discussion. Last reply by SweetMelissa Jan 18, 2016. 96 Replies

There have been so many recent new members here who are just barely in their journey that I have been thinking a lot about how we can best encourage them. My heart so clearly remembers the first few…Continue

Tags: Hope, Grief, Encouragement


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NMWidower's Blog

Remembering Heidi and Reflections on the last three and a half years...

Posted on June 12, 2013 at 10:42pm 10 Comments

May 5 2013 was officially three and a half years since Heidi was lost to us.  It amazes me still that even after fully grieving and rebuilding in life, I still find myself almost out of breath when I think on the tragedy of that day.  For those of you who don't know me or my story, we lost Heidi very suddenly and unexpectedly one dark November night, when in a moment of weakness due to postpartum depression she took her own life.  I found myself with a four month old and a 3 and a half year…


Feeling alive and at such peace this Christmas

Posted on December 25, 2012 at 3:02am 12 Comments

Hello everyone,

I had to make a quick post as I had quite an epiphany last night.  It has been just over three years since my wife Heidi passed away in quite a tragic fashion and this is the third Christmas we have had without her.  But this is also the first Christmas we have had since I have been remarried.  In fact I got remarried just over six months ago.

What really hit me last night was that for the first time in who knows how long I truly was completely…


The joy and the bittersweetness in approaching remarriage

Posted on May 23, 2012 at 11:23pm 23 Comments

In just three weeks I will once again marry a beautiful and amazing woman and rejoin the ranks of the married. In preparing to go to Texas this week to get a marriage license I happened upon death certificates and the marriage license that my late wife and i gathered.  Not that i really think I will need these, but there is part of me that just likes to be prepared for possible contingencies!  But in looking at these tonight I cant help but remember and feel a bit sad knowing that life Heidi…


Neat thoughts from Christina Rasmussen the founder of Second Firsts

Posted on January 12, 2012 at 8:13pm 2 Comments

Christina Rasmussen is the founder of second firsts.  I have been connected with her page on facebook for quite awhile now.  While I may not always agree 100% with everything she says, I have really appreciated the way she encourages people who have had a loss of a spouse to live again. Many of her posts helped me find that will to want to live life again...

She had this post today that encouraged me and several other widow/widower friends today I thought I would pass it on…


Comment Wall (57 comments)

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At 7:21pm on May 29, 2014, Doug02122014 said…

Thanks for friend invite. Great to hear from someone who has traveled so far on this journey. Truly is inspirational.

At 6:05pm on May 24, 2012, BrittneyR said…

Thanks for the friend request, and for posting the MercyMe video. That song is such a blessing to me right now. Your girls are just adorable! And congrats on getting remarried, that's so exciting and so encouraging to hear :) Wishing you the best!

At 10:50am on May 24, 2012, kimkirt (KK) said…

Hi Pat, thanks for the friend request!

At 8:19am on May 8, 2012, Sunflower37 said…

Hi NMWidower, thank you for the request.

At 8:50pm on April 26, 2012, jimswife33 (Michelle) said…

Congratulations thats wonderful.

At 6:27am on November 5, 2011, Dianne in Nevada said…
Thinking of you today, Pat.
At 2:06pm on October 29, 2011, tharsis said…

Hi NM, Thanks you for the friend request. It's been hard for me to even get on here to respond, but I guess we all just are doing the best that we can. I lost my best friend, ex-wife and roommate to ovarian cancer on Aug 31st and it's been very hard for me, so I appreciate you reaching out!


Ed (aka Tharsis)

At 8:26am on October 22, 2011, Marsha said…
Thanks for friending me. I look forward to getting to know you as I move toward the summit.
At 7:19pm on September 30, 2011, Debbie said…

For your kind words, thank you.

At 11:23am on September 27, 2011, Debbie said…

I'm having a hard time finding good things in life, thanks for your positive posts.



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