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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

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Pointbass
  • Male
  • Spotswood, NJ
  • United States
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  • Mporras
  • Deana1950
  • jojen
  • Doug02122014
  • laurajay
  • Patience (Diane)
 

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Latest Activity

Pointbass replied to Leeky's discussion The Long Good-Bye in the group Long-Term Illness
"Hi Leeky, it's been quite some time since I have been active here on WV, but your post really struck a chord. I lost my wife of nearly 35 years in May 2016. She had been battling cancer pretty much since 1990 but in particular the last 5 years…"
Monday
Susan replied to Pointbass's discussion Retire? Or Not? in the group Born in the 50s
"Hi!    I don't know I want to. Right now I only work may 2 times a week at the most. I think I need to be around people once in awhile. Susan"
Apr 8
CarLady replied to Pointbass's discussion Retire? Or Not? in the group Born in the 50s
"I turned 62 in December 2016, and am also considering retiring at the end of this year.  My husband passed away 3-1/2 years ago this month.  My company pension is based on retirement at 63 (! odd, I know) and I will have been there 20…"
Mar 6
Pointbass replied to Pointbass's discussion Retire? Or Not? in the group Born in the 50s
"Just as a follow up to this posting, I have "semi-retired" from my job.  I was trying to retire completely, but the company has been unable to find a suitable replacement for me so I'm doing 20-25 hours a week remotely from my…"
Jan 5
Athena53 replied to Pointbass's discussion Retire? Or Not? in the group Born in the 50s
"I retired in 2014 at age 61 due to toxic politics. I took a look at the numbers and decided that I didn't need to work for a living anymore. DH was 76 and had been retired for years. While deploring the nasty politics that led to my…"
Dec 31, 2016
NoLongerInBergenJC replied to Pointbass's discussion Retire? Or Not? in the group Born in the 50s
"I was going to retire in 2 years when I am 63, collect my husband's Social Security and switch over to mine at age 70.  By then I will have 10 years with my employer and be eligible for retiree medical, which isn't all that special,…"
Dec 28, 2016
Strono1 replied to Pointbass's discussion Retire? Or Not? in the group Born in the 50s
"I too am struggling with this. I love being around people and would miss that. I am swaying more toward at least cutting down to per diem in the summer. That would give me a little time to adjust. I have other things I would like to do and am trying…"
Dec 28, 2016
Dianne in Nevada commented on Pointbass's video
Thumbnail

BunnyGoode - A Life Celebration

"A beautiful tribute of your Bunny. Her dolls are amazing and I loved those sparkly hearts. "
Sep 22, 2016
Patience (Diane) commented on Pointbass's video
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BunnyGoode - A Life Celebration

"Such a powerful and poignant tribute..."
Sep 22, 2016
Pointbass replied to Soaring Spirits's discussion Will you help us help the widowed people of the future?
"The survey was fairly straight-forward. You can do it without revealing your name or other info. Hopefully the results will help future programs for those of us who experience these losses."
Sep 22, 2016
Pointbass commented on Pointbass's blog post Bringing Along the Family
"Just like every dog that knows he's been defeated, I've rolled over and exposed my belly on the "food store" issue.  That said, after 65 years of saying food store I'm fairly sure I'm not changing.  And I…"
Sep 16, 2016
Mimi commented on Pointbass's blog post Bringing Along the Family
"FYI:  my local grocery store here in Austin carries fire ant killer, dog toys, balloons and party supplies, books (paper back and hard back,) umbrellas, and the list goes on..."Food Store" just doesn't cover it.  Best to you…"
Sep 16, 2016
Rockon commented on Pointbass's blog post Bringing Along the Family
"That is your "Jersey" flying high Pointbass! Just my So Cal gal opinion. My late soulmate was born and raised in upstate New York. I enjoy your sense of humor and completely love reading your posts. Also, I am very happy…"
Sep 15, 2016
Pointbass posted a blog post

Bringing Along the Family

I just spent an extended weekend with my girlfriend (yes, I’m using the “girlfriend” thing regularly now) at her home down south, sort of a quasi-trial run (trial run 1 of a potential 3) (maybe trial run 1 of a potential 4) (or possibly trial run 1 of a potential 2 … things went very well …) to see how we would actually get along if we were living together. There was never a big doubt that all would be good, but, hey, as we all know, the bouncing ball of widow-dom can go just about anywhere. So…See More
Sep 15, 2016
Dianne in Nevada commented on Pointbass's blog post Closure & Journey
"Love your writing, Pointbass.  Even though the word 'journey' is part of my blog title, I get your point. I don't like 'closure' or 'moving on' either, but I'll admit they've slipped out a time…"
Sep 12, 2016
widow85 commented on Pointbass's blog post Closure & Journey
"Hear, hear. While we're at it, let's throw in the "moving on" towel, too. I had some lovely advice from a widowed acquaintance, that she considered that she started a second life as a different person after the death of her…"
Sep 12, 2016

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Bringing Along the Family

Posted on September 15, 2016 at 6:08am 3 Comments

I just spent an extended weekend with my girlfriend (yes, I’m using the “girlfriend” thing regularly now) at her home down south, sort of a quasi-trial run (trial run 1 of a potential 3) (maybe trial run 1 of a potential 4) (or possibly trial run 1 of a potential 2 … things went very well …) to see how we would actually get along if we were living together. There was never a big doubt that all would be good, but, hey, as we all know, the bouncing ball of widow-dom…

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Closure & Journey

Posted on August 26, 2016 at 8:00am 4 Comments

I have had some really interesting conversations recently regarding the words “closure” and “journey”, so regularly used when discussing the state of my widowed status. I’ve used those exact words myself many times, casually flipped out there like a business card to anyone who is interested. Just for the sake of conversation, I looked up the Merriam-Webster official descriptions of these two heavily over-used nouns:

Closure: a feeling that a bad experience (such as a…

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Breaking All of the Rules

Posted on August 20, 2016 at 4:30am 10 Comments

As I close in on 3 months since Bunny died it appears that I have broken ALL of the rules.  Especially, you know, the overall Big Rule - Don't make any major decisions:

The Rules:

  1. Don't quit your job
  2. Don't rush into clearing stuff out of your house
  3. Don't start a new relationship
  4. Don't move
  5. Don't make any financial…
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Counting the Days

Posted on August 5, 2016 at 9:58am 2 Comments

I no longer say “my wife died (5,6,7,etc) days ago”, now it’s “a few months ago”. And before too long it will be “last year” and then “several years”. When I first realized I was saying “a few months ago” it sounded cold & unfeeling to my ears, as if I didn’t care that much or that her death was somehow much less important now. But that’s not it at all. I think a few things happened that started to change my approach to mourning, and in turn, affected my telling of her passing and my…

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At 5:58pm on July 1, 2016, Patience (Diane) said…
Welcome to Widville, Pointbass. I'm so very sorry for your loss, but pleased that you found us. You'll find caring support and friendship here.
Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Click the help link at the top of the page! You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place.
Be sure to check out the HOME page for the latest news. I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville.
 
 
 

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