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twinsmum's Page

Hello my name is Richelle and I live in Western Australia.  I have twin 13 year old boys and I was widowed suddenly on 29 April 2010.

So now we are trying to find the new family norm....this is a wonderful site and although it is through unhappy circumstances I am glad to be a part of it.

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Latest Activity

twinsmum liked bad ass widow's blog post Annoyingly Positive
Sep 3, 2012
twinsmum commented on aussiewidow's blog post Amazing win - $2550!
"Congratulations....good things come when least expected."
Sep 3, 2012
twinsmum liked Lisa (lost) Lamb's blog post On our Anniversary.
Aug 21, 2012
twinsmum replied to JPSwifeCathy's discussion IN-laws:::What do I call them now?
"mine are still my in-laws and quite possibly will always be although yes I have had a couple of strange things happen in the last year but we got over it.  My fil is quite scared on losing contact with my boys but they are 13 nearly 14 and…"
Aug 19, 2012
Dianne in Nevada left a comment for twinsmum
"Hope you had a really special day. Happy Birthday, Richelle."
Aug 16, 2012
twinsmum commented on Sheryl-momof4's blog post Then and Now
"Lovely - and love how you have the two photos of the family getting older.  We too do camping and had our first major trip last Christmas.  The beginning of the trip was absolutely terrible and everything went wrong.  I am in a 4WD…"
Aug 8, 2012
twinsmum commented on Soaring Spirits's group Born in the 60s
"I agree we're all too young to be a widow/er.....but boy has it aged me :(  2 teenage boys to handle alone..... I am in a local widow/ers group here and when I first joined people said it must be sad to be one of the youngest -…"
Aug 8, 2012
twinsmum replied to Soaring Spirits's discussion For those who have dated... how did you know when you were ready?
"Well Chris I am currently dating a 43 year old who has never been married and no kids (bonus as I already have 2 and they are a handful LOL)....and his last girlfriend was 4 years ago.  I can't work it out neither as he is very thoughtful,…"
Jul 12, 2012
twinsmum commented on Rebirth.Tanya (Tanya)'s blog post Eighteen years...eleven years...never forgotten.
"agree...beautiful story xx  "
Jul 2, 2012
chez2all and twinsmum are now friends
Jun 27, 2012
twinsmum commented on chez2all's blog post A TIME TO MOURN
"yes thanks for sharing xx  I too believe that as a society we need to understand and talk about death more openly and remember to mourn and grieve.  We also need to teach our younger ones (children) that this process is ok and death is a…"
Jun 26, 2012
twinsmum commented on smit09's blog post screw June
"Big hugs Stacey xx I completely understand how this issue keeps bringing it all to the forefront.  My Craig was killed in a motorbike accident.  Not a drunk driver but the driver did say that Craig did not have his headlight on as well…"
Jun 26, 2012
twinsmum commented on MelissaRRT's blog post I have been a widow for 19 very long years...
"Melissa - hopefully a blip on the radar.  We will never forget and wonder what could of been but we just got to keep moving forward.  I am only 2 years on this journey and really hope I can continue forward xx Dianne - you never seem to…"
Jun 26, 2012
twinsmum replied to Lisa (lost) Lamb's discussion Sharing my husbands ashes
"mmmm....not sure if there is any right or wrong answer.  When my MIL (at the beginning) said that Craig's brother would like some ashes I didn't actually say anything but I thought no way I am not splitting him up.  It just…"
Jun 25, 2012
twinsmum commented on Lisa (lost) Lamb's blog post I think I figured it out, now what to do with it.
"Hi Lisa - I agree with Dianne - everyone is different and how one person can move forward may not work for someone else.  It is important to say connected with others - I think that is what helped move me forward, having kids made me keep…"
Jun 10, 2012
twinsmum replied to Brian's discussion Girlfriend doesn't like to see picture of my late wife
"Well I answered earlier on the picture issue but in regards to the FB issue - I believe - what has happened in the past is part of the past and deserves to be remembered.  A new future will flow.  So all posts/pictures etc. stay there…"
Jun 10, 2012

Comment Wall (16 comments)

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At 8:57pm on August 16, 2012, Dianne in Nevada said…

Hope you had a really special day.

Happy Birthday, Richelle.

At 9:22pm on May 9, 2012, Janine (txmomx6) said…

Hi Richelle! Thanks for your comments about my post.  I'm always glad to meet new people, even though the reason we're meeting is horrible.  But it's nice to see so many good things happen out of something so horrible.

Hugs to you from Texas!

At 7:45pm on May 7, 2012, kimkirt (KK) said…
Thank you for friending me! Hugs!
At 1:51pm on September 13, 2011, Eileen said…

Hi Richelle,


I just got your message on my page.  The books are called "Getting to Calm" by Kastner and Wyatt and "How to Hug a Porcupine" by Julie Ross.  It is a "difficult" age and throw in grief for all of us, and it can be harder.  These books helped me to calm down and understand all the changes that occur at this age.  And good ways to deal with less than ideal behavior.  Please feel free to private message me!  And many blessings to you with this huge loss of ours.

At 12:20pm on September 5, 2011, loveliveson said…
Hi Richelle, thank you so much for your comments on my blog post!  Yes, the counseling thing.. one minute it seems like it would be a good idea, assuming your son would actually go (my middle son did), but then they seem to be doing better and it you don't want to feel like you're reinforcing loss by still seeking it out..  I went through that whole thought process re:  grief camp for my 7 year old.  At the time I started considering it, he was receptive.  A few months later at registration time, he wasn't in that frame of mind anymore.  So we learn, yet again, how to be more flexible :)  I noticed your comment about school forms, and what to put.  This has been such a thing for me.  First I left it blank, but that didn't feel right.  I've settled on "deceased."  For awhile I considered, putting their dad's full name, plus "(deceased)" but then I thought maybe that was too morbid for other people... I don't know.  That last option feels the best, because I feel he deserves to be there somehow.  Looking forward to getting to know you!  Maria
At 9:21am on August 17, 2011, Debbie said…

Happy Birthday Richelle...hope you find some joy in the day with your beautiful boys!

My thoughts are with you today 

At 10:10pm on August 16, 2011, Dianne in Nevada said…



Hope your special day is filled with love and peace, Richelle.



At 5:43am on August 1, 2011, JennyWisconsin said…
hi twins mum - glad you sent the friend request... look forward to chatting
At 5:46pm on July 31, 2011, rodsgurl09 said…
Thanks for friending me, Richelle :) ((hugs))
At 11:50pm on July 27, 2011, Alycia E said…
Got your comment on my blog. Write, girl, write. Get it out. You don't have to be eloquent. Speak your heart. We are listening.

Twinsmum's Blog

29 April 2010 - the day my husband was taken from me.

Posted on April 29, 2012 at 11:21pm 3 Comments

Well I made it through 29 April.  And the day went extremely well.  A few texts from friends who remembered, some flowers and some hugs.  Not a tear was

Friday.....different story.  I also had a reading from a pyschic/clairvoyant.  Lots of tears but I felt so relaxed afterwards and felt I was doing ok and on the right path.  A phone call from the FIL - which really tore me apart on an emotionally drained day as well.  I cannot believe the things the in-laws are…


Second best!!!!

Posted on April 12, 2012 at 10:48pm 12 Comments

Most of us lost our partners not by choice unlike a divorce (choice in some circumstances anyway).  We never fell out of love - well at least I didn't.  Yes of course our marriage had its ups and downs and Craig wasn't the be all and end all but he was my Craig and I loved him.

What scares me is that I had it right the first time round.  I am generalising here so may not be right in all circumstances - but in some cases of divorce - you fall out of love.  You didn't get it right the…


Brother-In-Law's Wedding next week.....

Posted on March 1, 2012 at 4:07am 6 Comments

Well in 10 days time my BIL will be getting married.  Craig should of been the best man to his brother! And an aunt of his arrived yesterday and relatives from NZ will arrive this weekend and then all tother relatives arrive through next week.  I haven't seem most of them since the funeral 22 months ago. 

I am looking forward to the wedding although I also know there will be the 'other' questions and concerns which may taint the whole celebration.  'How are you', "have you met anyone…


New Person in life/New Dating....Advice Sought

Posted on January 30, 2012 at 4:40pm 4 Comments

Well where do I start. To those who have started dating again or have a new person in there life or are in the next relationship after their partner died. I don't really know where to start or what to ask. I have met someone new who is happy to spend time with us at the moment which is great. I met him on the camping trip we did.

Funny I thought when I did meet someone again it would take awhile for me to introduce him to the kids.  In this scenario he met us all at the same time. …


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