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Steve
  • Male
  • Poway, CA
  • United States
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Steve's Discussions

Anybody experiencing sexual problems with new spouse after being widower?

Started this discussion. Last reply by Steve Sep 16, 2015. 4 Replies

Hi everybody. My name is Steve and I was partnered to the same man over 30 yrs, until his passing in 2009 from cancer. We were both in our teens when we committed to each other and I loved him very…Continue

Are you in process of moving on, creating a new life after the loss of your spouse?

Started this discussion. Last reply by Steve Jun 10, 2015. 18 Replies

Hello, my name is Steve and my long time male life partner passed in March 2009, from an 18 month battle with stage 4 colon cancer. We had just celebrated our 30th anniversary the prior January…Continue

 

Steve's Page

Latest Activity

Steve replied to Nieta's discussion Have you experienced any "God Winks" (i.e., messages) from your late spouse?
"Awwww so cute, Chris and i collect Teddy bears, and have them around our home. My nickname for Chris, is "cubby" ."
31 minutes ago
Steve replied to Nieta's discussion Have you experienced any "God Winks" (i.e., messages) from your late spouse?
"Hi Nieta, thanks so much for your reply. Yes, I agree, all animals in my opinion, have that gift. The story about uncle hank is great! I believe the same. Take care,"
35 minutes ago
Danielle commented on Steve's blog post Still miss Mike
"Gorgeous post, Steve. The heart wants what the heart wants, isn't that what they say?  It sounds to me like you've done all you possibly can, to be honest with yourself and with the man beside you now. And he's made his choice,…"
48 minutes ago
happylilycat commented on Steve's blog post Still miss Mike
"What an absolutely beautiful tribute to your Mike.  It moved me to tears, and I needed a good cry this morning, so thank you for that!  I also appreciate your searing honesty about how complex your relationship with Chris is, and it's…"
3 hours ago
Steve replied to Nieta's discussion Have you experienced any "God Winks" (i.e., messages) from your late spouse?
"MPMom, i totally would have felt those situations as winks too. No doubt to me. With me, in the begining, i used to doubt sometimes, or question, "am i reading too much into this"? but, at some point, i just decided i wasnt going to…"
yesterday
Steve replied to Nieta's discussion Have you experienced any "God Winks" (i.e., messages) from your late spouse?
"Hi Danielle, i loved this about the teddy bear, i have many around my home too. I also heard Mike in my ear, saying "get up", another time, "Steve". . It kind of scared me the first time, out of the blue."
yesterday
Steve replied to Nieta's discussion Have you experienced any "God Winks" (i.e., messages) from your late spouse?
"Thats great Diane, good idea. Thank you!"
yesterday
Steve replied to Nieta's discussion Have you experienced any "God Winks" (i.e., messages) from your late spouse?
"Hi Colleen! Those to me are wonderful winks, or messages from your husband. Ive had so many over the past 8 years since my partner passed. Mike and i both had no doubt that life and love continues on forever. There is only death of the body, however…"
yesterday
Steve commented on kellygreenstrat (Colin)'s blog post Heard it in a Love Song
"The song that always gets to me is "Like you'll never see me again" by Alicia Keys. I remember driving to the pharmacy after i just just dropped Mike off at home from the drs appointment where the doctor had just told us he was…"
Tuesday
Steve commented on MyJoyMyLightMyLove's blog post No Title
"Hi, im sorry to hear that your brother isnt more caring, empathetic, supportive. I take it maybe, he has never been thru something like this? Thats what i find, anyway. People who have lost someone close, get it, others dont. The people who dont get…"
Tuesday
Steve commented on Steve's blog post Still miss Mike
"Thanks so much Barbie! Really appreciate your reply. I try to do just that, i know you are right, its just tough because i see how hard Chris tries, and i feel bad, because i know he feels like he needs to compete, even though i have told him he…"
Tuesday
Steve replied to Nieta's discussion Have you experienced any "God Winks" (i.e., messages) from your late spouse?
"Hi Nieta and everyone. I love that! About no way out, only a way through. That is so wonderful a way to describe this journey. Thank you for sharing that. Dan, i loved your story about New Orleans. Mike and i actually planned 3 trips to New Orleans,…"
Tuesday
Steve replied to Nieta's discussion Have you experienced any "God Winks" (i.e., messages) from your late spouse?
"Thanks Nieta, wonderful wishes, and i hope the same for you. (((Hugs))))"
Tuesday
barbee commented on Steve's blog post Still miss Mike
"Steve, I think you express very well what it means to lose someone after so many years. It doesn't matter if it is a same sex or opposite sex relationship. I was married for almost 50 years and now am in a new relationship with a wonderful guy…"
Tuesday
Steve commented on Jerseygirl2525 (Andrea)'s blog post I don't know where he's buried
"Hi Andrea, im so sorry to read about this situation. I completely understand how you could feel bad or guilty, or letting your husband down in this scenario, but please, please try hard not to. There is no way you could have known that this could,…"
Sunday
Steve commented on Medea's blog post Home
"I love the "Haunted Mansion" theme! It sounds great! Chuckled at your "dork" comment. I also tried my hand at some veggies, last year in a plastic "apartment, patio garden" . I actually got some tomatoes and green…"
May 20

Profile Information

Steve's Blog

Still miss Mike

Posted on May 19, 2017 at 9:55am 6 Comments

I am now over 8 years out from the most horrific day of my life, when my best friend, life partner, love of my life, passed on March 1st, 2009, 8 days after his 50th birthday. We had met in our mid teens, fallin in love almost immediatly, and were inseparable from that point on. We shared over 30 years together and were in process of planning our retirement in a few years when Mike was diagnosed with stage 1 colon cancer out of the blue at a regular, 6month checkup. Although colon cancer is now… Continue

Overwhelmed with loss and new life

Posted on March 2, 2016 at 8:27am 9 Comments

Hi everyone. I've been feeling very overwhelmed with life's changes lately. Also have been extremely reflective of my past. I am currently 53, turning 54 in April. As I look back over my life, starting back in my early childhood, the overall feeling I have is gratitude, grateful for the people I have known and loved, grateful for most of the characters that have entered and left my life. I have had many, many wonderful, crazy, fun experiences, experienced such tender love, have truly been so… Continue

Comment Wall (12 comments)

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At 6:39am on August 22, 2016, Slick said…

Steve I feel like we have been friends for years...so many life changes and hurts we both have been through...

At 3:54pm on May 2, 2015, Hornet (Cindy) said…

Hello, Steve. Thank you for the nice comment on my post. I am about 20 months out...that seems so strange typing that number...20. It surprises me how unreal it still feels...almost 2 years out. Before it was me in these shoes, I would have thought the 'new' life would have taken over by now. Now I know.

I was reading your posts and understand that your Mike passed several years ago. Isn't it a miraculous thing how two human beings can meld together so completely at the heart? And when one goes, how completely it devastates the other? I was so spiritually wounded when Rick died, I could hardly speak. And now, here I am...just floating around. (That's how it feels...just floating.)

I wish you peace, Steve. Peace and love and healing.

At 8:16am on February 22, 2015, rosamore (Kamala) said…

Hello Steve,  I have been reading your posts since I joined WV last year.  My husband passed away three months ago.   Your posts are so uplifting with positive thoughts which I surely need it. So happy to read you found someone that you are happy again.  That is wonderful. Keep posting positive posts it will lift everyone spirit.  

At 9:37am on January 5, 2015, Markus said…
Nice to meet you steve
At 11:49am on June 28, 2014, Patience (Diane) said…
Steve, read your post on the 2009 board about your parents. My mom is home and my step dad is in the nursing home. I don't think you need a lawyer to do what your lawyer friend suggested. You can do it on your Own. Take Mom with you and go to the Board of social services, or wherever in California is the equivalent to the NJ board that puts people on Medicaid. My 83 year old mom actually did it on her OWN with barely any help from me. I was just her cheerleader and helper. I'll be happy to answer any of your questions. Diane
At 6:35pm on December 17, 2012, Hopeful said…
Steve, he is leaving you signs! Gives me goosebumps. Wow. I pray for signs every day. When we are open to them, I believe we will receive them. I loved the blue hair story... those memories are gifts. Take good care.
At 6:18pm on November 8, 2012, MissingRKK said…

Steve, your writing is so magnificent. I pounce on your posts--for your open-heart, your honesty, your humor, your willingness to go deep and not hold back. You have a gift and you feel like a gift to me. I thank you, dearly.

Carrie (MissingRKK)

At 7:51am on September 28, 2012, Suz said…

Thanks, Steve. i love reading what you have written. I m such an emotional person at heart but my husband was a bit of a large figure (in small circles). The honoring has gone on for six months and I am having the hardest time grieving despite the fact I loved him so deeply. It helps me to have you share your real feelings.

Warmly
Suz

At 6:06am on August 31, 2012,
VOLUNTEER
Soaring Spirits
said…

Welcome to our community.... I hope we can keep you company on your journey ahead. Please look around a bit and read this basic introduction to the site. You can find more information about how the community works under "Help!" in the navigation bar, and we'll send you a few newsletters with tips and ideas in the coming weeks. If you need a little more help, go to the Home page and look in the right hand column to see the link to a "Help Desk" form.
We all use the site differently, but we hope you feel comfortable sharing among us in the coming days, weeks, and months.
Big hug!
Supa
site founder and admin

At 6:17pm on August 24, 2012, desertdweller87 said…

Hi Steve, I cannot seem to find you in the LGBT forum so thought I would post here. I am glad you found us and I am sorry for your loss and the hectic journey you have been through since your partner died. I was a caregiver as well for Karen for almost 10 years. Post whenever you feel the need and someone will respond. Hugs!

 
 
 

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