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  • Murfreesboro, TN
  • United States
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Ashleynicole8378's Friends

  • Larryh0823
  • Misty
  • BabushkaD (Debbie)
  • Dianne in Nevada

ashleynicole8378's Discussions

Need some advice please?

Started this discussion. Last reply by happylilycat Apr 19. 23 Replies

So I lost my husband Mark just about 3 months ago. He was only 37, and he fought a battle with cancer for 10 months prior. His birthday is coming up on April 23rd. The Saturday before I wanted to…Continue


Started this discussion. Last reply by widow85 Mar 15. 5 Replies

 I've had a rough day and have been feeling pretty angry. I think it was triggered by going to church this morning. My loss is recent, my hubby Mark just passed in January from cancer. I used to…Continue


ashleynicole8378's Page

Latest Activity

ashleynicole8378 replied to Leeky's discussion Who am I? in the group Widowed in 2017
"I absolutely hate being called single. I have a young son, but I can't stand thinking of myself as a single mother. I prefer the term solo parent, because I no longer have anyone to share the parenting responsibilities with, but am not single.…"
May 2
ashleynicole8378 replied to Leeky's discussion Who am I? in the group Widowed in 2017
"We lost our husbands on the same day. My "babe", Mark passed on January 2 2017 around 9pm. What an awful day that was. "
May 2
ashleynicole8378 replied to Jill's discussion What's scaring you these days?
"I'm terrified of something happening to my son, he's the only thing keeping me going. I'm scared of having a mental breakdown. I'm scared that I might be becoming dependent on the pain meds I've been taking to help me sleep.…"
May 2
happylilycat replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"Ashley, I am so sorry for your loss, but I'm glad you found this on line community.  I don't think our culture in the USA has any idea how to deal with death in a healthy way, so many people just run away from us as we grieve. I too…"
Apr 19
widow85 replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"Wow, there is a lot of wisdom in these postings. I just had a huge crowd, family and friends, over for Passover. (Card tables in the living room, somebody got the wonky chair, etc.) My late husband was Jewish, I was raised Catholic so we basically…"
Apr 19
Steve replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"So right Diane, sorry to hear of your fathers passing, my Father passed Feb 12, 2016 from Alzeimers as well. At that time mom and i were both wishing him to pass, he was suffering so much, and so were we watching him. He was so tortured in the end,…"
Apr 19
Patience (Diane) replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"Well said, Mike. And on April 7, the on day you posted this my Father passed away from Alzheimer's. The one thing about life is that change is constant. We don't notice the little everyday changes until a huge life event like the death of…"
Apr 19
Callie2 replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"So glad the air was cleared and you can still remain friends. Keep in touch with the wives, like you said. In the future, you may have a change of heart and wish to join them, you never know, depending upon the type of outing. There's always a…"
Apr 18
ashleynicole8378 commented on MyJoyMyLightMyLove's blog post No Title
"So sorry you are having a hard time with this. I still considered myself married too, but it's only been 3 months for me. I still wear my wedding ring and honestly don't know if I'll ever stop. I get comfort in looking at both my…"
Apr 18
Steve replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"You are so welcome, Ashleynicole, and if anything i shared in any way, helped you, im so happy it did. Take care"
Apr 18
ashleynicole8378 commented on Soaring Spirits's group Widowed in 2017
"It's really starting to occur to me how hard solo parenting is and my son turns 2 next month. So still have a long way to go. Went on a little road trip Easter weekend to see my family in North Carolina (We live near Nashville TN) I of course…"
Apr 18
ashleynicole8378 replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"Thanks for all the replies everyone. This helped me to see things from a different point of view. I talked to my friends and they said the camping trip was planned like 6 months ago. Mark just passed about 3 months ago so the trip would've been…"
Apr 18
Steve replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"That makes sense Athena, could be so. Glad you enjoyed bike race, good for you! Steve"
Apr 12
Athena53 replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"I had another thought on why relationships change after one half of a couple dies.  Elsewhere here, people have observed that their marriages/partnerships had 3 components:  them, their loved one and their existence as a couple.  The…"
Apr 12
Steve replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"Thank you Athena, Im glad if my story helped in any way. Thank you for sharing a bit of your journey, as well. All our journeys are very individual, we grieve differently, however i personally always gleen some comonality from everyones story. So…"
Apr 11
Athena53 replied to ashleynicole8378's discussion Need some advice please?
"Steve- thanks for this long, eloquent story about how relationships change after the death of a loved one.  I'm glad you had so many supportive friends and family members around in Mike's last days and for the funeral even though…"
Apr 11

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At 2:28am on March 21, 2017, Larryh0823 said…

Ashley,  I understand exactly how you are feeling.  This is such an up and down trip that it is difficult to know exactly what is going on.  I understand about the texting too.  I am unable to have Sandra's cell phone disconnected because I still want to be able to communicate with it from time to time.  When I really want to talk with her it is the only way I know to do it.  I have joined an in-person group.  It is Grief Share,  I have been going for several weeks now and I was fortunate to get in a group where most of the people there had lost a spouse.  Most people in this group lost their spouse in the past 6 months but some have been longer.  Sandra and I did almost everything together so now that she is gone I am having to learn to do almost everything on my own.  We were married for almost 20 years and met later in life.  Now I am 62 and having to attempt to start my life over without her has been difficult.  I retired in December to be her caregiver.  At the time I retired we thought that this was a recovery process that we were going on.  It was not until the last 30 seconds that I realized that this was not going to come out the way we expected.  Hopefully, as you continue to go through your support group there will be other people that will join the group that have suffered the loss of a spouse and then you will not feel so all alone.  This road is long and full of obstacles but hopefully you will be able to continue to find ways to rebuild your life.  If you feel the need to continue to talk please feel free to reach to me anytime you desire.


At 4:46am on March 20, 2017, Larryh0823 said…

Ashley,  I have been on the roller coaster that everyone is always talking about.   Today marks exactly 2 months since my wife died.  Some days I can deal with things other days it just hurts so bad.  I have one of those big what ifs.  My wife had a serious infection around her colon and if the doctors had discovered it soon enough with the antibiotics she might could have been saved but they didn't discover it until it had already gotten into her blood system.  I hope you are going as well as can be expected.  If I remember correctly you date of loss was pretty close to mine.  Hopefully, talking will help you some.


At 4:23am on February 7, 2017, Inafog213 said…
Hi Ashley, I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my husband in August due to colon cancer (it's been 6 moths) and we have a 4 year old. All my daughter knows is that daddy was sick and the medicine stopped working. I worked in corporate America for 29 years and stopped working last June. Everything has changed and since I'm now a single parent, not only do I need to be there for my child, I want to be there. I don't want to deal with the stress and BS.
I actually started my own business where I can work from home and I'm growing it. It's allowed me the flexibility to grieve and it's also a distraction.
It's still early for you and I'm sure your probably still in a fog. The first few weeks are hard. I'm here if you want to talk. Sending you hugs.
At 10:08pm on February 6, 2017, Dianne in Nevada said…

Welcome to Widville, ashleynicole8378. I'm so very sorry for your loss, but pleased that you found us. You'll find caring support and friendship here.

Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Ask here!  You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place.

Be sure to check out the HOME page for the latest news.  I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville


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