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bad ass widow
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- Cary, IL
- United States
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WHY IS IT?
Started this discussion. Last reply by kimkirt (KK) Sep 4, 2012. 1 Reply 0 Likes
Why is it when a person has been diagnosed with cancer people come out of the woodwork with unsolicited horror stories?I mean WTH? This person is fighting for her life and people are commenting on…Continue
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bad ass widow liked srm541's blog post Announcing marriage plans
bad ass widow replied to Supa Dupa Fresh's discussion Introduce yourselves, please!
"Need a "Like" button for this. I do have to jump in on this just because. Life is Life, Death is Death and a Loss is a Loss. While we all share the commonality that we grieve our losses, our losses are unique to…"
bad ass widow commented on carolynne's blog post SSLF Survey
"((hugs))) Yes, it was hard confronting those questions, and YES it does get less hard. It does get better but in a different way. Its all part of that roller coaster."
Jpswife(Cathy) commented on bad ass widow's blog post Back To Being The Worst Widow Ever
"Thanx for the ((((((hugs)))))))"
Lori commented on bad ass widow's blog post Back To Being The Worst Widow Ever
"i've mixed up dates and forgotten stuff too, remember the events of his last year mostly but not the dates, and cry for the wierdest reasons."
bad ass widow commented on bad ass widow's blog post Back To Being The Worst Widow Ever
"Cathy, dont be ashamed. I didnt cry when Keith died or the one year or his birthday or really any of the "Firsts". The only time I really cried that first year was when I tried a rib joint that he always wanted to try and the…"
Suz commented on bad ass widow's blog post Back To Being The Worst Widow Ever
"Amy,
I didn't realize it was Jud's birthday until the day before. Then it was like a of bricks. Been my hardest memory day yet. I was numb on all the other ones. Self-protection is an amazing thing. I have PTSD, too and function just like…"
Jpswife(Cathy) commented on bad ass widow's blog post Back To Being The Worst Widow Ever
"hello amy
no, you dont get the WORST WIDOW EVER----i believe I got that one!!----i couldnt cry at John's funeral, his birthday or even his 1 year SADiversary!!4-25-13 I'm ashamed to admit this!! (((((HUGS)))))) cathy"
hendrixx2 commented on bad ass widow's blog post Back To Being The Worst Widow Ever
"Hi Amy,
Not so sure you're the worst widow ever, I'm thinking you have a lot of company along these lines, I'm in there for sure. I can accept what you were told about it being a self defense mechanism as I'm finding my mind…"
janet commented on bad ass widow's blog post Back To Being The Worst Widow Ever
"No Amy you are not the worst widow ever. We all have a tendancy to go blank for no reason at all. Death sucks and we just learn to cope with it. May you have a soft day. (((Big Hugs)))"
bad ass widow commented on AlanRRT's blog post Yes, hope matters
"I dont think it was meant to be rude either, just an observation by one person. I cant speak for anyone else but I have had negative days and depressing days, and am glad that I can come here, say my negative and depressing thoughts and…"
bad ass widow commented on AlanRRT's blog post Yes, hope matters
"Yes Alan, HOPE matters. I too went on other sites and they did not offer me the hope that I needed. I never posted on any of them, but would read all the comments and for ME, I found that they dragged me even further down into that pit I…"
bad ass widow liked hendrixx2's blog post WeCoverWE
bad ass widow commented on Angie aka Woody's Girl's blog post Have You Gone To A Funeral Since Your Husband's?
"Ah Angie, so sorry. Yes going to funerals for others is rough. I actually went to a wake of a friend 2 days after Keith died and 3 days before we could have his wake. I know right? Talk about a fog. Shocked the hell out…"
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Back To Being The Worst Widow Ever
Posted on April 28, 2013 at 3:33pm 7 Comments 0 Likes
I have a confession.
I AM THE WORST WIDOW EVER !!
I have a tendency to forget things and dates that are important. My counselor once told me its a self-defense mechanism. I tend to bury things that are hurtful to me. I dont like being sad or angry and I guess I believe that by burying these things way down deep they cant hurt me anymore. No wonder she diagnosed me with PTSD. I deal with drama and trauma very well while it is happening, but then break down later (sometimes…
Continue I Just Went In For Downspouts
Posted on April 10, 2013 at 10:45pm 7 Comments 6 Likes
I need new downspouts.
Its raining, A lot.
Water is seeping into my basement. A lot.
Being the confident (ha ha), self sufficient (LOL) stubborn (Ok, that is true) I set off to the local Menards to find me some new downspouts. Ones that would fold up and out of the way when it wasnt raining. Cant have the ones that just lay on the ground, because my daughters dog thinks that they resemble sticks and will stop at nothing to yank them off and bury them.
So into…
Continue Where Did My Voice Go?
Posted on February 10, 2013 at 1:47am 9 Comments 2 Likes
Where did my voice go?
Really, where did my voice go?
One of the lessons of being a widow is learning how to be alone. I have learned many ways of coping and living without my husband but I never imagined that I would start losing my voice. Simply because I dont use it anywhere near as much as I used to. I probably speak less then 40 words from 5:00 PM when I get home from work and 6:45 AM when I start work again. And most of those words are one to five word commands to…
Continue Ok Babe, I Got The Message
Posted on January 13, 2013 at 12:40am 9 Comments 2 Likes
Keith has a way of sending me signs. They are not romantic or fantastic rainbow type of signs. They are simply signs that makes me know he is still around.
The last couple of months have been hard and I have been finding myself backing away once again from everything. From here, from friends, from family. I have seemed to have lost my ability to find joy, positivity, and worst of all my snarkiness has taken a hit. Even blue suckers have not been able to drag me out of this…
ContinueComment Wall (22 comments)
- At 10:40am on June 17, 2012,
Dianne in Nevada said… Thinking of you today, Amy ♥
- At 8:18pm on May 14, 2012,
jimswife33 (Michelle) said… Happy Birthday Amy! I hope you have a wonderful day.
Michelle
- At 12:51am on May 14, 2012, Dianne in Nevada said…
Hope you have a really wonderful day.
Happy Birthday, Amy!
Dianne
- At 5:01pm on March 21, 2012,
hendrixx2 said… Hi Amy, thanx for your comments, I am only able to do anything these days in part because of you and the others who helped me when I was at wit's end. Wishing Peace and Healing for you....
- At 3:02pm on February 12, 2012,
t2 said… thank you, amy.
- At 5:18pm on February 11, 2012, hendrixx2 said…
hi baw, thanx for friending...
- At 2:01pm on February 3, 2012,
Tulsa Chris said… BAW, I adore this post and hope that one day I can feel that strong. Susan, my life partner just died on 12/29, followed a month later by our freind and Susan's persoanl trainer, Kimbra. Kimbra was an important part of our home since she helped Susan battle her MS. The loss of my Susan, and Kimbra's support are almost more than I can bear. But I will prevail.
- At 4:24pm on January 31, 2012,
Susan L said… Thank you for adding me as a friend. Today has been better than I expected. I got a surprise visit from my son and his wife. They drove 2 1/2 hours to come in to take me to lunch. It made my day! I hope you're doing well. Hugs.
- At 8:22am on January 30, 2012,
job4348 said… Amy, we haven't met but I was reading 'The House of Me' and was so impressed by it and thought I sent a like. but I'm not sure.(not real good on computer skills-lol) Would like to get some of those new bricks of yours. And your post about doing just fine good for you holding on to your temper but yeah that you told those people off. Brenda
- At 3:47pm on January 21, 2012, Dianne in Nevada said…
Thanks for missing me around here, Amy. (Love your new profile name!) I don't have time to get in here during the work week but I'm around on the weekends. Just haven't been spending much time in the chat room (because I'm spending too much time on Words with Friends over on Facebook). I stopped into the chat room last weekend but felt those there thought I was a moderator and it didn't make me feel comfortable (or them either probably) so I went offline. I'll try again this weekend.
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