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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

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barbee
  • Female
  • Everett, WA
  • United States
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Barbee's Friends

  • Rainy (Misty)
  • InsideLove
  • Alexandra
  • Jim
  • elaine
  • Ellie
  • JC&DK
  • sugr-plum (shelly)
  • Doug02122014
  • Maggie
  • Brianne
  • lonelyinaz
  • HeartsForever
  • Frank
  • Patience

barbee's Discussions

Anyone from the Pacific Northwest?

Started this discussion. Last reply by Soaring Spirits Feb 14, 2014. 2 Replies

I'm hoping we can get a regional event going. Anyone interested in meeting at an Applebees or Starbucks or some place to get acquainted? I live in Everett. Has to be a daytime event because I cannot…Continue

 

barbee's Page

Latest Activity

barbee replied to Blithe's discussion Relationship issue complicating my grief
"In grief it is so very easy to feel guilty. All the woulda/shoulda/coulda things surface. A good friend told me to take a trip -- any place, in real time or in my imagination  --just do not take a guilt trip. I had to remind myself of that…"
Jun 2
barbee replied to only1sue's discussion What are the fundamentals of dating in your 60s and 70s?
"Yes, there are bad guys out there and they all are not men! I did the online dating route and encountered a number of men. Some good; some fun; some where it was difficult to even stay for a 45-minute coffee time.   However, during the…"
May 28
barbee commented on only1sue's blog post A week after Mother's Day
"Sue, have some patience with yourself. I'm not fighting any illness and your schedule wears me out just reading about it! As to garments for lymphodema, have you looked online? There are dozens of reliable medical catalogs that sell adaptive…"
May 19
barbee replied to Rainy (Misty)'s discussion Does anyone actively journal?
"Burning early journals was something I did too. They contained so much sadness and anger and frustration and many more kinds of negative emotions. It was a way I could offload the bad stuff and get to sleep at night. I knew without a doubt I…"
May 14
SweetMelissa2007 commented on barbee's blog post Moving on...
"Sounds like The Neutral Zone of Transition ...The in-between stage of development during grief ...Letting go of the past while not fully being in the present ...This happens whether re-married, unmarried or in a relationship ...From my experience,…"
May 11
Mamitha commented on barbee's blog post Moving on...
"I hope to be there in that spot some day. And i love that.. moving on is not forgetting.."
May 10
barbee replied to Rainy (Misty)'s discussion Does anyone actively journal?
"It's all about the process. As each of us processes grief differently, each individual journals differently. No right way; no wrong way. It is just our own, personal way to help healing and accepting what is."
May 10
Blue Snow commented on barbee's blog post Moving on...
"Nicely said!"
May 9
barbee replied to Rainy (Misty)'s discussion Does anyone actively journal?
"Misty, I do journal and have off and on for most of my adult life. I used to write about my feelings and it was a healthy way to release anger and frustration or make sense of confusion. The final year of my husband's life he was in Hospice.…"
May 5
only1sue commented on barbee's blog post Moving on...
"I agree Ray is present for me whenever I am with the grandchildren, whenever I am with old friends but many times now I am the new Sue, post Ray, post marriage, just your average elderly widow. I am sure that is the way people see me who do not…"
May 4
Callie2 commented on barbee's blog post Moving on...
"Interesting insight Barbee. Glad you found that explanation, it really does make a lot of sense. Wishing you lots of happiness!"
May 3
Rainy (Misty) commented on barbee's blog post Moving on...
"Barbee, my hat's off to you!  I hope one day I'll find my way too."
May 3
barbee replied to Fromage's discussion shouldn't i feel worse than i do?
"What you feel is what you feel. There is no better or worse. We are all different because of the time and way death came into our lives. We can get comfort here by knowing others are grieving too and we can share our stories and offer our…"
May 3
barbee posted a blog post

Moving on...

It has been over five years since you left. In that time, I bought a house and sold it and moved again. I found a man who cares about me, and after we spent many months traveling across this nation, we decided to commit to a relationship. Most days life is wonderful and safe and comfortable again. There are some days -- and sleepless nights -- that still feel lonely and confusing. Today in my reading I found a sentence that helps me understand  this mish-mash of emotions: "Moving on is not…See More
May 3
barbee replied to Dez's discussion Emotional Days?
"It has been over five years for me and once in a while I have "one of those days".  I'm in a relationship with a man who has been widowed 14 years and he has those trigger days also. We both were married around 49 years and…"
Apr 2
barbee replied to InsideLove's discussion What else have you found to help with anxiety/attacks, if you have/had them?
"It seems you are doing everything right. There is no hurrying grief relief. In my experience, you don't get over it; you learn how to get through it. It's been over five years for me and there will always be some parts of my life that have…"
Apr 1

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Comment Wall (16 comments)

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At 4:12pm on August 12, 2017, Don said…

I am happy that you have found your new parter .  May God Bless you  both.   Don

At 11:31am on July 22, 2016, Skeezix said…

Barbee,

I'm so sorry that I haven't responded to your messages. I just signed on a couple days ago for the first time in almost a year and discovered I actually had messages in my inbox!  I sent you a friend invitation but haven't heard anything back yet.  Don't give up on me yet.  I'm still working on navigating this site.  Skeezix

At 1:17pm on April 19, 2015, Frank said…

Hi Barb, Where did you go?

I went to the chat room and I did not see you in chat nor the list of active members so I guess you logged off.

How's things going?  We are having high winds and snow squalls today, but there are periods of sunshine as well.  The front should have moved further east  in the next couple of days to give us a break in the winter weather.  When that occurs, I'll drive into Denver to get some groceries  and run errands.  

We had 5 inches one day and two days later 7 inches, the next night 2 inches, and last night one inch.  Meanwhile its snug as a bug in the home.  

Hope all is well, and I look forward to your notes and our exchanges.

(((Barbee)))

Frank 

At 7:36am on March 30, 2015, Frank said…

Hi Barbee,

I'm in the Mountain Time Zone.  Generally speaking, I watch the news/weather till about 2230 and then I get on the radio (I'm a ham radio operator) for another hour or so.  Then I do a final check on my email, and log into WV.  If someone is there, and they want to chat, I'll stick around for another hour or two. 

I look forward to chatting with you and Thank You for your invite.

Sincerely

Frank

At 5:50pm on March 21, 2015, thelmaz said…

I'm glad you enjoy the blog.  I've had computer problems lately plus I'm so overwhelmed with downsizing, I can hardly think.  Thelma

At 2:09pm on February 6, 2015, Christopher said…

Thanks, barbee. I only just saw your comment left more than a week ago. I‘ll have to remember to look into my page. I had left tabs open for the groups I’ve joined, but not my own page. Oops!

At 2:25pm on January 27, 2015, flyingsummers said…

I do need a buddy to get around and to helpgetting through the grief.

At 5:38pm on December 17, 2014, JC&DK said…
Would like to try a new group in everett,
Thank you
At 5:29pm on October 8, 2014, david1980 said…
Thank you for responding on the Ebola post. More than that... thank you for being a friend. This past couple weeks I have had more time to read the posts and respond.
At 4:14pm on April 20, 2014, WebLady said…

Hi barbee,

Thank you for your note. Sorry for your loss as well.

Nice to hear you are in the "neighborhood".

I think I am still in shell shock here. My hubby was perfectly healthy one minute and dead the next. I am mostly out of the denial phase but, just so damned sad that at times it is unbearable.

I have not yet come to anything resembling normal and feel most comfortable in isolation.  I have friends and family willing to help but, I find when I am near them I am more distressed.  So meanwhile, I am lurking here on this site and a couple of others. I do find some comfort in reading the posts.  I guess because unless you've been there you can't possibly imagine the likes of this!

Barbee's Blog

Moving on...

Posted on May 3, 2018 at 2:05pm 6 Comments

It has been over five years since you left. In that time, I bought a house and sold it and moved again. I found a man who cares about me, and after we spent many months traveling across this nation, we decided to commit to a relationship. Most days life is wonderful and safe and comfortable again. There are some days -- and sleepless nights -- that still feel lonely and confusing. Today in my reading I found a sentence that helps me understand  this mish-mash of emotions: "…

Continue

Got rid of your bed

Posted on March 21, 2015 at 8:53am 3 Comments

It has been just over two years since you left. When I moved I brought your hospital bed with me. It was to be temporary. I knew I would donate it. It gave me something to sleep in temporarily. But other things needed replacing or fixing and they were more important because, after all, I had a bed to sleep in.

Well...the day arrived and I bought a complete bedroom set and new mattress last week. It is a queen-size. It is like sleeping on a cloud. It is so big I get lost in it. It is…

Continue
 
 
 

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