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desare
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  • cairns
  • Australia
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desare's Discussions

i just dont know what to do

Started this discussion. Last reply by BelovedPeach Jul 5. 26 Replies

I'm so lost.i don't know how to be happy anymore.i have no direction and no desire.I made pete my world.i just cant find a reason anymore for trying orsurviving.whats it all about.Continue

what to say to people who tell you how to handle things.IM STUCK.

Started this discussion. Last reply by Imogen Jul 25. 9 Replies

Hi,i lost my pete last year it was one of  the worst year of my life.Pete left me without warning,he was my world and my future and he loved me so so much and I him.the laughter we had together and…Continue

 

desare's Page

Latest Activity

Imogen replied to desare's discussion what to say to people who tell you how to handle things.IM STUCK.
"I got so fed up with people telling me what to do, especially the ones who haven't been through a spouse dying.  My parents called and told me what to do early on.  I replied "When one of you die the other can pitch in, until…"
Jul 25
WV12345 replied to desare's discussion what to say to people who tell you how to handle things.IM STUCK.
"Have you thought about grieve counseling, either in a group setting or individual?  I started individual sessions before my husband died as there wasn't a support group for his illness locally and after his death, I joined both the widows…"
Jul 22
BelovedPeach replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"Hi Imogene, thanks for posting because I can so relate. I am feeling a little better after reading your post. Like you, I don't have any children and haven't spoken to my family in years. I too feel lucky when I'm out and actually get…"
Jul 5
Lupe's husband replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"Hugs and happy Canada Day!"
Jul 2
Imogen replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"Today is Canada Day & everyone is celebrating, having friends over.  I took my dogs to off leash, felt so alone as most were couples.  Came home to having to paint door frames that are peeling so bad I should have done it last year.…"
Jul 1
evadiva replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"You know it's so sad that we all sound so alike. All our thoughts, sadness and lives are all so alike. I think it was Ann who said no one can take away the pain and how true it is. Iain passed away in February, we had been together for 30…"
Jun 29
Imogen replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"evadiva, I get what you are saying.  Amazing how a show we watched together, now is just not interesting. Like you we were home bodies, both working full time & Doug too much overtime, he was too drained to do anything. I too feel young, I…"
Jun 28
Athena53 replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"evadiva, I hope not!  I lost my husband last year; I'm 64.  We were homebodies, too, to a certain extent- rarely entertained, didn't go out to eat, didn't do things with other couples.  In some ways, that last part was…"
Jun 28
evadiva replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"I get what everyone is saying, I feel totally at a loss. Iain and I were homebodies,we would go to work, come home, have dinner, sit on the couch and watch TV. I loved my life. Now all the programmes we watched, Masterchef, all the cookery…"
Jun 28
Imogen replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"I know what you mean. I have benzene so busy for weeks. This week Monday and Tuesday nothing planned and I am at a lose. I just go to my to do list and do two these a day. Somehow to make it seem like I have a purpose. I'd rather been the dad…"
Jun 27
Callie2 replied to desare's discussion what to say to people who tell you how to handle things.IM STUCK.
"Hi Dan, Very sorry for your losses. Glad you found this site, it is a good place to "let out" some of those thoughts and feelings. I remember well when I would see or hear something that I wanted to tell my husband and I had to remind…"
Jun 26
Dan replied to desare's discussion what to say to people who tell you how to handle things.IM STUCK.
"I lost the love of my life almost 2 1/2 months ago. We did everything together. Going out to friends houses seemed like I was going to do something that Asha enjoyed doing and I was betraying her. (NOT taking her with me). I get to the friends house…"
Jun 26
widow85 replied to desare's discussion what to say to people who tell you how to handle things.IM STUCK.
"I totally agree with the advice to say "Thank you, but I need to grieve in my own way."   Sounds like they would be more comfortable if you would just act more "normal" (as defined by them) --…"
Jun 26
Susan replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"HI Desare,    I seem to be having that same problem. .. I'm OK when something is PLANNED for me to do, or to go to work.  ... But when I'm home by myself, I just don't know what to do.    Ever since High…"
Jun 23
ashleynicole8378 replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"Omg I feel you about friends ignoring your pain. In going through the same thing and its not even been 6 months yet. I've always been kinda the out ball of my friend group anyway, but I'm beginning to think they only tolerated me because I…"
Jun 21
ashleynicole8378 replied to desare's discussion i just dont know what to do
"I feel the same way. I stay busy because I work and have a 2 year old son. But every day is just going through the motions. I adore my son, but hate being a solo parent. I find myself thinking only 16 more years until he's grown. Then I feel…"
Jun 21

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hey,i lost my Pete last year we were together for 17 years.he took me so long to find we had the most amazing 17 years I was so lucky to have had this man love me.i miss him so much and am finding it so hard to cope with life I'm trying to find a way to live again.

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At 1:13pm on June 5, 2017, Dianne in Nevada said…

Hi desare. We have a private group for our Australian members to make connections through First Light Widowed Association that you may be interested in. Here's a link to the group page:

http://widowedvillage.org/group/first-light-widowed-association

At 1:12pm on June 5, 2017, Dianne in Nevada said…

Welcome to Widville, desare. I'm so very sorry for your loss, but pleased that you found us. You'll find caring support and friendship here.

Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Ask here!  You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place.

Be sure to check out the HOME page for the latest news.  I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville.

 
 
 

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