"These days, even more as getting rid of his things, I am looking back for some structure in my life.
Having a rapid snack, standing next to the stove isn't uplifting at all. But where do I get the energy from?
This Sunday morning…"
Even after 3,5 months I feel the same as you describe it. I just cannot understand: never again, never again. Never again will I meet him. Every day there is so much I have to discuss with him, I want to share with him.
I had almost the same experience when my husband died. We also are not religious and we also didn't talk about death and dying. I regret that now sometimes. We were in a constant state of denial. Our daughter…"
I am so happy for you, your pet scan was ok. That must be a big relief. I am 66 and always something is bothering about your health at that age.
At this moment I am extremely sensitive for everything what is related to cancer. …"
"thank you Barzan, Sweet Melissa, and Nancy D. Again I know again I am not alone in this very difficult situation. I learn from everyone of you. And it's good to be reminded of hope from time to time. So important for me. No matter how…"
"I have put this in a blog post before: I realized I am still very much in love with my husband. And I know it will stay that way. I am not looking for someone else to put me at number one.
Nor do I want to take my own life. I miss him…"
"On this Sunday, the day after our wedding anniversary, I realized how much I am still in love with my husband. I only want to hug him endlessly now.
It is only 3,5 months since he died, but I miss him more as I could…"
"Does this also happen to you? Sometimes it is as if the sky falls over your head. And you only want one thing: him, him, him..
I have a terrible day this Sunday.
I remembered the lovely weekends we had together and…"
"Yes often also my thoughts make no sense. I know my husband died. I was with him on that moment. But I can't open his wardrobe. First because I know he will not need his clothes anymore. And second because my kids have given some of his…"
"Yes LP, Listening to music we both liked so much is hard. You have the sweetest memories and the raw reality. I too had tickets for bands we both liked and came to our city this summer. I sold them because I didn't dare to go on my…"
Today is our wedding anniversary. And I am feeling numb. I am almost afraid to move. To avoid any feelings. On the other hand I want to feel my husband near me. I want to remember every hour of this happy day.
"Yes, It's like that: You have a good time, surrounded by nice people, and then coming home, alone, the sky falls on your head.
It's mostly not being able to share these good moments with him that makes it so bad. And I can't…"
"I am truly sorry for your loss. Your story could be mine, including the dates: 50 years together, 47 years of marriage. Looking forward for the future and getting old together. Having our little chats about everyone and…"
Congratulations on your Wedding Anniversary. I am sure you and your husband would have celebrated this with a huge party. Yes you must feel lonely now.
That's why I want to give you a big hug. I am feeling with you.
"Despite all help from family and friends I often ask myself if life is still worth living for me. Yesterday we celebrated my son's birthday. All my children and grandchildren together. It was wonderful and good. But my husband is no…"
I too want you to know I am feeling with you. Today, it's exactly 3 months without my dear husband. There is not one moment he is out of my mind. But I need him to be with me for real. Which is no longer possible. I…"
Melanoma started inside. Diagnosed Dec after wierd bruises then thought after surgery snd meds and radiation was fighting it but then started getting weaker and weaker than went to ER 2 hrs later had severe seizures and did not respond they said to wait 24 hrs but didn’t make it. COR and all meadures tried. Absolutely a nightmare that haunts me daily
I truly appreciate you responding. You are the first one to comment. My husband fought cancer too but only for 6 months . Its all too fast and horrible. He was the love of my life of course. We only had 14 years it just wasn’t enough. Seems like if in stage 4 and mets to brain the treatment s just aren’t good enough. But I don’t know if it was his time it was his time but I will never understand it. It’s definitely shaken any faith I had. Pretty much trying to make it 5 minutes at a time.
Welcome to Widville, riet. I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here. Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Click the "help" link at the top of page. You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. And the "chat room" is open 24/7. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place. I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville. Take care of yourself.