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I am going through some very serious depression regarding the sudden loss of my wife. We were married for 44 years and I am extremely lonely and could really use friends who can relate to my situation.
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Hey Ron: After five years I can say I am better. I'm not sure the loss will every go away completely. My first year was the worst and the second not much better but better. A lot of people told me to get a dog. I ended up getting and then giving away three. I made some decisions in my first year that I probably shouldn't have. I don't have a lot of friends. My husband was the social butterfly that kept us busy. I had a roommate for awhile and she kept me busy going to bars and talking to people. She has moved away and I can't bring myself to go alone to any of those places. I like to play scrabble and cribbage. There is an online game called Lexulous which is scrabble like. There is a chat feature too. My pen pal and I play. If you are interested, I could send you an invite. Friends find it hard to fill the gap of a spouse. They visit for an hour or two and then leave. It's almost harder after they leave than before because it's like the void is even bigger.
I don't mean to be so morose but I'm being truthful. Is there anything you liked to do alone before your wife died? Any hobby? I crocheted everyone I know a hat or shawl. Kinda of silly in So Cal.
I read your post in the 50's group. I am finding it harder as time goes by too. I think I remarked someplace that I wish someone would have warned me it gets worse before it gets better.
I'm right at eight months out and have decided to see a therapist for the anxiety. anyway, not much to offer as advice, I just wanted to let you know you aren't alone. Re: anxiety she told me to remember anxiety is a lie.and it tricks your brain. It's hard work to get through all of the emotions loss leaves us with. (hugs)
Welcome to Widville, ron323. I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here.
Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Ask here! You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place. I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville. Take care of yourself.