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  • Santee, CA
  • United States
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I am going through some very serious depression regarding the sudden loss of my wife. We were married for 44 years and I am extremely lonely and could really use friends who can relate to my situation.

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At 6:55am on August 17, 2018, swisnorg said…

Hey Ron: After five years I can say I am better.  I'm not sure the loss will every go away completely.  My first year was the worst and the second not much better but better.  A lot of people told me to get a dog.  I ended up getting and then giving away three.  I made some decisions in my first year that I probably shouldn't have.  I don't have a lot of friends.  My husband was the social butterfly that kept us busy.  I had a roommate for awhile and she kept me busy going to bars and talking to people.  She has moved away and I can't bring myself to go alone to any of those places. I like to play scrabble and cribbage.  There is an online game called Lexulous which is scrabble like.  There is a chat feature too.  My pen pal and I play.  If you are interested, I could send you an invite.  Friends find it hard to fill the gap of a spouse.  They visit for an hour or two and then leave.  It's almost harder after they leave than before because it's like the void is even bigger.

I don't mean to be so morose but I'm being truthful. Is there anything you liked to do alone before your wife died?  Any hobby? I crocheted everyone I know a hat or shawl.  Kinda of silly in So Cal.  

At 2:45am on August 17, 2018, Rainy (Misty) said…

I read your post in the 50's group.  I am finding it harder as time goes by too.  I think I remarked someplace that I wish someone would have warned me it gets worse before it gets better. 

I'm right at eight months out and have decided to see a therapist for the anxiety.  anyway, not much to offer as advice, I just wanted to let you know you aren't alone.  Re: anxiety she told me to remember anxiety is a lie.and it tricks your brain. It's hard work to get through all of the emotions loss leaves us with.  (hugs)

At 10:25am on August 9, 2018, eliana said…

Welcome to Widville, ron323. I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here.

Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Ask here!  You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place.  I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville. Take care of yourself.


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