"Kimkirt, I am also coming up on the year mark in Nov. The first year was kept busy with adjusting and taking care of our 3 year old, but now that its getting closer to that day, I find myself reliving that fateful day and am breaking down in…"
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suddenlyalone
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- Portage, IN
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suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Widowed in 2011
"Letha thank you for the link for the bears. My coworker made me a quilt out of my husband's clothes but I would like the bear to give to my son"
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Widowed in 2011
"Cheryl, I have T-mobile and when I explained what happened, all I had to do was submit a copy of the death certificate along with his account info and the penalty was waived. contact the phone company and explain the situation to them"
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Suddenly widowed
"Welcome Dianna. I am also a young widow, 38 with a 3 year old. My husband passed suddenly on Nov. 2011. This site has really helped me get through what I call my new life. I miss my husband soooo much but I'm getting stronger as the months…"
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Widowed in 2011
"Hello everyone. I read the comments about the weight gain and I see I'm not the only one. Double stuff Oreos and cookies & cream ice cream has become my best friend. If it wasn't for my 3 year old, I probably wouldn't be cooking.…"
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Widowed in 2011
"Hi everyone, I have been peeping in every now and then. I have been apartment hunting these last two weeks. After catching up on all the posts, I was thinking on what to do on my 1st anniversary that my husband died and decided that I'm going…"
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Suddenly widowed
"I have read the comments on faking it and can relate. I'm now at a place where I no longer care about the ones that walked away. God revealed to me who my true friends are and those are the ones I can show my true feelings and at times hold me…"
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Born in the 70s
"Kitty42, I feel the same way, I was born in 1974 and my husband born in 1960. Although it sucks being widowed at any age, I really hate saying it at 38"
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Suddenly widowed
"Today was another big step for me. Earlier this evening I went out with some former coworkers and really enjoyed myself! I can't believe I'm learning how to genuinely smile again.....yay me!!"
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Suddenly widowed
"Larry I just read your post and I totally understand you. I think I skipped some stages but I am definitely in the lonely stage. Just recently I got dressed up and went to a banquet and I felt as if I was on prom, but when it was time to take…"
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Widowed in 2011
"Not having a good day. Im 5 months into this and for the first time I have felt really lonely. Im letting things get to me lately and I really hate feeling like this!!!! "
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Suddenly widowed
"Today was a sad day for me but an eye opener. I had to attend a funeral for a dear friend of mine that suddenly passed away with leukemia. As I was reflecting on a full life that she lived, I realized how I have been letting life pass me…"
suddenlyalone commented on Supa Dupa Fresh's group Widowed in 2011
"I enjoyed reading everyone post about the rings. I stopped wearing mine a couple of months ago. For me, it stopped having a real meaning to me. I like the idea of having it redone. I do still feel married and am having a…"
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Suddenlyalone's Blog
newbie
Posted on January 17, 2012 at 8:13pm 10 Comments 0 Likes
I cannot begin to tell you how I found this site, but I am happy I did. My husband had a sudden heart attack on November 20, 2011 and my life has been in a fog since then. My only strength comes from God and our 2 year old. I started a new job 2 weeks ago and the paperwork asked me of my marital status. It was so hard to put down widow, especially at the age of 38!! I am looking for ANY advice on how to handle this grief.
Thank you
Comment Wall (7 comments)
- At 10:00pm on February 27, 2012,
Gretchen in NH said… I totally understand your thing about waking up alone on your birthday. My husband died two weeks to the day before my 51st birthday in September 2010. Didn't feel like celebrating that milestone or my 52nd a year later either. Believe me, I know your pain. Best wishes and loving thoughts to you.
- At 10:54pm on February 17, 2012,
kenslove said… I'm trying to keep busy myself, but it's the nights that really get me down...We're gonna make it, hang in there.
- At 12:36am on February 15, 2012, kenslove said…
Suddenlyalone,
Thanks for stopping by to check on me, much appreciated....taking things one day at a time, feels weird for lack of a better word, being single again. I thought valentine's day would be tougher, but I got through it well. How are things going with you?
- At 10:33pm on February 7, 2012, kenslove said…
Suddenlyalone,
Thanks for your words of encouragement, but allow me to extend my sympathy in the passing of your husband as well. I patiently await the day when I can actually go a whole day without tearing up and/or crying...I'm told this journey gets better with time and I'm counting on God and time to get me through this.
- At 9:46am on January 18, 2012,
Lisa (lost) Lamb said…
I'm so very sorry for your loss, but I'm glad you've joined us in our journey. None of the roads that we travel will ever be the same, but having someone beside you that truly understands is a blessing. You will find comfort and understanding here, just as I have the past 8 months. Just remember to be kind to yourself and take life one moment at a time for now. It's ok to put your self first so you can begin to heal.
- At 12:17am on January 18, 2012,
Dianne in Nevada said… 
I'm so very sorry for your loss, suddenlyalone, but glad you found us. There is caring support and friendship here. Join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place. Those 'chirps' you hear when you're in Widowed Village mean people are talking in the Chat Room; stop in some time and join the conversations. I look forward to getting to know you here.
- At 9:39pm on January 17, 2012,
Susan B said… Hi and welcome.
Basically anything you do or think, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone, is acceptable during your grief. Your grief experience belongs to you and like a snowflake, will be different from anyone else's, so there is no comparing grief here or anywhere. So never let anyone tell you how to grieve or when to display it. We all have our meltdowns, and it's bet to let those around you--family and friends-- know that it's going to take as long as it takes, no telling...and ask them to let you cry when you need to, lean on their shoulders, ask for hugs, or favors, or jokes...whatever you need. You'll find that as the fog lifts, you will be able to give back to conversations and activities and relationships...it will come naturally without thinking too much about it.
Grieving is a natural way of re-examining our place in the world, the meaning to our lives, and our relationships to everyone. You can reinvent yourself if you like, just take it slow and easy if you decide to make changes. Your mind and reasoning may not be at full measure for some months, and still may play tricks after a few years.
Anger at your sudden situation is natural but needs to be channel constructively. Try to find little things to be thankful for every day--a birdsong, a flower, a child's smile, the hug of a friend or neighbor, a good book, etc. Counting your blessings can shine a little light where you may think there is complete darkness.
If you open the "blogs" link near the top of the page, it will open a list of blog postings other WV'ers have written. You can read them and comment, and it never hurts to leave a simple message to the poster. Or a long involved one, either! Some people like to go to "chat" where people are connecting live for chatting about whatever, 24/7.
Oh, and Vent here whenever you need to. There will be no judging. WE all need to do it and it is good therapy. (((((Suddenlyalone)))))) <--hugs!
Susan B
This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people
Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.
Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.
We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."
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