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  • Thetford Center, VT
  • United States
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vintage56(barb)'s Discussions

the little things

Started this discussion. Last reply by Lisa_says Mar 7, 2019. 19 Replies

I have been thinking about the silly little things, inside jokes and sayings we used to share. Like if someone passed us on the road in a big hurry, Frank would say "He must have a promise". Or after…Continue

Plans for the holidays

Started this discussion. Last reply by SweetMelissa2007 Oct 25, 2017. 12 Replies

As Frank and I did the "snowbird" thing for 30 years, we were never around family for the holidays. Now I am staying in the frozen north year round and am within driving distance of most of my…Continue

After almost 2 years, little things can still set me off

Started this discussion. Last reply by Callie2 Feb 12, 2019. 14 Replies

looking through FB, someone had a post about their husband getting a knee operation. Just seeing a picture of an older man in a hospital gown with IV started the tears flowing. Does it ever end....Continue

trying to arrange a family memorial service.

Started this discussion. Last reply by widow85 Jul 29, 2015. 11 Replies

We were snowbirds, living in New England in the summer and down south in the winter. My only family is my sister and her husband, who live up here. Frank has 4 grown kids with GKs. Two live up here,…Continue


vintage56(barb)'s Page

Latest Activity

vintage56(barb) replied to D's discussion recently widowed
"Hi D, my story is similar. Frank also had DLBCL but due to his age, a stem cell transplant was not an option after the first round of chemo failed.  He got inpatient chemo and I was there with him every step of the way. When he was sent home on…"
Apr 15
vintage56(barb) replied to Rich's discussion Your reaction to the Coronavirus
"Having a hard time today, Frank would have been 80 today. Missing him so much, especially with everything else going on. Listening to Patti Page singing "What'll I Do." A mess."
Mar 19
vintage56(barb) replied to Dee1960's discussion Wedding Rings -- why wear them?
"I thought about this some more (after watching a video on how to remove stubborn rings) and decided not to try. The way I see it, if anyone is going to be attracted to me, they will get to know me first. I am not that good-looking but have a good…"
Feb 25
vintage56(barb) replied to Dee1960's discussion Mediums
"No, the one I saw said "Don't keep coming back, nothing to gain from it." I know some do though. But I think like anything else, there are real ones and fakes."
Feb 25
vintage56(barb) replied to Dee1960's discussion Mediums
"I went to one guy, Drew Cali - absolutely cold reading. Unbelievable connection. Amazing. Went to another one, nothing. Went back to Drew, nothing special. He even said, no need to come back, it is not an ongoing conversation."
Feb 5
vintage56(barb) replied to SoreEyes's discussion Mother-in-law Zinger
"yeah, ask for the car back. Tell her you want to keep it in YOUR family. SMH too!!"
Feb 5
vintage56(barb) replied to Soaring Spirits's discussion Dreams and signs. Does your loved one appear to you in dreams?
"I had another little "sign" that made me smile - I had picked up a used book called (I think) Evidence of Afterlife. As I opened it up, a paper napkin fell out with "I (heart) U" on it."
Feb 1
vintage56(barb) replied to Rich's discussion Still sleep on the same side of the bed?
"I found myself sticking to "my" side of the bed (left side) for years after Frank died. When I bought  a new bed for my new apt., I now sleep right in the middle. Does anyone else sometimes get the sensation that there is someone…"
Jan 29
vintage56(barb) replied to Dee1960's discussion Wedding Rings -- why wear them?
"I gained some weight after he died and now I can't take it off. I may someday (If I can lose some weight). I would like to meet someone, not to marry or even be romantic with, but just as a companion/friend."
Jan 22
vintage56(barb) replied to Maggiepie's discussion Rebirth and connection
"I've thought of that also. What if my DH is reincarnated, and when I die, he is not waiting for me?"
Jan 14
vintage56(barb) replied to Maggiepie's discussion Talking to hubby in my head or aloud
"Almost 5 years here, I still talk to him. I ask him how I am doing, if he would be proud of me."
Jan 12
vintage56(barb) replied to MishyB's discussion Is it just me, or is "How are you?" a dumb question to ask a widow?
"I had an acquaintance ask that a few weeks after Frank died (and he KNEW) and I said, "OK". He came back with "Just OK?" Really? I am supposed to be fantastic after losing my husband, just so you can feel good? smh."
Jan 4
vintage56(barb) replied to Rich's discussion Christmas 2019 and beyond
"Thank you. Christmas will be over tomorrow and I need to start practicing saying "Fine and you?" when people ask me how my day was. No one wants to hear my woes."
Dec 25, 2019
vintage56(barb) replied to Lablady's discussion ATTN: ADMINS, Any updates on the new chat room?
"I miss logging on in the morning and having coffee with Don and the gang. The FB chat is most active at night. It seems to be a much smaller group and if you don't know everyone's backstory (I don't) it can be hard to follow."
Dec 17, 2019
vintage56(barb) replied to Alma's discussion I miss him
"The holidays are so hard. Even after 5 years, I tear up so easily, listening to holiday music, etc."
Dec 17, 2019
Sleepless In Seattle left a comment for vintage56(barb)
"It's been raining in my I thought I would come in from the downpour.  I'm not sure what I will find here, but it's better than standing in the rain all alone.  I'm soaked with pain to the depths of my heart and…"
Nov 21, 2019

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Vintage56(barb)'s Blog

slipping away

Posted on November 17, 2019 at 8:41am 4 Comments

I went back to my old neighborhood last week and found that the house Frank and I had built and lived in for almost 25 years had been torn down by the people we sold it to. Makes me sad, first he is gone and now our house is gone. We actually built it all ourselves, it was perfect for the two of us and it was built with love.

Sometimes it seems like I am the only one who remembers him anymore. His family has not contacted me in over a year (4 grown kids, his not mine, his…


Comment Wall (5 comments)

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At 9:11pm on November 21, 2019, Sleepless In Seattle said…

It's been raining in my I thought I would come in from the downpour.  I'm not sure what I will find here, but it's better than standing in the rain all alone.  I'm soaked with pain to the depths of my heart and I need a warm place to stay for a little while, at least until the storm passes, and the Son comes out to warm my heart.

At 8:16am on August 2, 2018, Rainy (Misty) said…

Barb,  I just wanted to say Happy Birthday!!!  I hope you'll be able to go out (or stay in) and have the best day possible!  You are so special and today is your day!!!  

At 1:33pm on January 3, 2017, diacon said…

Thank you. I don't know what wanting to be my friend means - but thank you for wanting to be my friend!  I appreciate your understanding and acknowledgement of the differences among lonely, alone and lonesomeness.  When I was in a grief group shortly after my spouse died, I collected things that people (albeit well meaning) said and sent them on to  the facilitator.  She (thankfully) is using them.  They are similar to something I saw on this site.  In many ways I would like to move on and in many ways I really don't want to.  Anyone relate?  Thanks.  

At 12:44pm on January 28, 2016, Ted'sRed said…

Thank you for the comment and the friend request, Barb.  I couldn't agree more.  My profile picture was my husband's favorite one of us because it captures the essence of our love (well, at least mine for him - LOL - but it was very much mutual).

At 10:48pm on February 6, 2015, eliana said…

Welcome to Widville, vintage56. I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here.

Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Ask here!  You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place. I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville. Take care of yourself.


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