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vintage56(barb)
  • Female
  • Thetford Center, VT
  • United States
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vintage56(barb)'s Discussions

Plans for the holidays

Started this discussion. Last reply by SweetMelissa2007 Oct 25. 12 Replies

As Frank and I did the "snowbird" thing for 30 years, we were never around family for the holidays. Now I am staying in the frozen north year round and am within driving distance of most of my…Continue

After almost 2 years, little things can still set me off

Started this discussion. Last reply by vintage56(barb) Oct 26, 2016. 9 Replies

looking through FB, someone had a post about their husband getting a knee operation. Just seeing a picture of an older man in a hospital gown with IV started the tears flowing. Does it ever end....Continue

How to feel old

Started this discussion. Last reply by Callie2 Jun 19, 2016. 1 Reply

#1 - Drive to local Social Security office to complete application for widows benefits (turning 60 soon).#2 - Drive past a bunch of young people doing THIS on the way.…Continue

trying to arrange a family memorial service.

Started this discussion. Last reply by widow85 Jul 29, 2015. 11 Replies

We were snowbirds, living in New England in the summer and down south in the winter. My only family is my sister and her husband, who live up here. Frank has 4 grown kids with GKs. Two live up here,…Continue

 

vintage56(barb)'s Page

Latest Activity

vintage56(barb) replied to Aly brabham's discussion Is it normal to keep items around your house of theirs
"I agree, you will know when it is time. One of the hardest things for me to get rid of was a large ziplock bag where I kept gauze pads, medical tape, LARGE bandaids, etc. He was always falling and skinning his knees and I would bandage them for him.…"
Saturday
vintage56(barb) replied to Doug02122014's discussion What to do with spouses personal effects and when?
"Well I finally got rid of Frank's favorite..................................knife!! Just a butter knife but he liked it because it had a big handle. He did not like dainty flatware. I have been carrying it around out of habit but now I have all…"
Dec 4
vintage56(barb) replied to Soaring Spirits's discussion Let's Get Acquainted
"We met in 1978, married in 1981, Frank passed in 2015 from Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma."
Dec 3
vintage56(barb) replied to Soaring Spirits's discussion NOVEMBER Anniversaries, Birthdays and Other Special Days
"so, friend is catching up on work at home, as will I. And treat myself good today. Hope you are all well and getting through another holiday."
Nov 23
vintage56(barb) replied to Soaring Spirits's discussion NOVEMBER Anniversaries, Birthdays and Other Special Days
"This may be my first Thanksgiving totally alone, it was always Frank's favorite holiday. The last two years I was with snowbird friends in the south, but I am not going down there any more. Waiting to hear from a local friend, we may get…"
Nov 20
vintage56(barb) commented on Athena53's blog post Outside of our Comfort Zones: Small Victories
"I have always been somewhat introverted but I started volunteering at a food shelf and got promoted to team leader. I find I really enjoy it and it keeps me very busy. Big step outside of my comfort zone. Oh, and I did my taxes all by myself this…"
Oct 29
SweetMelissa2007 replied to vintage56(barb)'s discussion Plans for the holidays
"Being that myself & our kids were heart sick w/grief, our best option was to stay home for a quiet 30 minute celebration of prayer & gift unwrapping ... Looking back to our first few years brings a chuckle ... The kids put up the tree w/4…"
Oct 25
SweetMelissa2007 replied to vintage56(barb)'s discussion Plans for the holidays
"Being that myself & our kids were hearts icky w/grief it was best we stayed home of a quiet 30 minute celebration of prayer & gift unwrapping ... Looking back to our first few years brings a chuckle ... The kids put up the tree w/4…"
Oct 25
Susan replied to vintage56(barb)'s discussion Plans for the holidays
"Hi!    This will be my first Thanksgiving without him. Last Thanksgiving we rushed him to the hospital. After that... things got worse.     My family always meets at my Parents house to celebrate most holidays. This year…"
Oct 24
barbee replied to vintage56(barb)'s discussion Plans for the holidays
"The first holiday I was really alone without my husband was Thanksgiving. Looking back, it is hard to believe that was almost five years ago and how much of my life has changed! I couldn't bear to be alone that year, so I invited people in my…"
Oct 23
booktime (Susan) replied to vintage56(barb)'s discussion Plans for the holidays
"So, I learned today that now my sister plans to be with her husband and son for Christmas. There hasn't been an invitation to join her. I'm not sure how this works. I'm not sure I would go as she is about 3 hours away and it is…"
Oct 22
InsideLove replied to vintage56(barb)'s discussion Plans for the holidays
"Right now my plans include my sisters visiting me for 3 days just after Thanksgiving. Then I visit them for a week at and through Christmas. Marty and I lived most of our 47 years away from family and each year during the holidays, celebrated with…"
Oct 22
vintage56(barb) replied to Doug02122014's discussion What to do with spouses personal effects and when?
"Doug, I would contact your local Council on Aging, I bet they know someone who could use it."
Oct 18
vintage56(barb) replied to vintage56(barb)'s discussion Plans for the holidays
"Well I just saw my sister this weekend. I was not expecting a Thanksgiving invite and didn't get one. Her last words were "See you in December" when she is planning to visit me. That's just the way she is, but it hurt a little…"
Oct 17
booktime (Susan) replied to vintage56(barb)'s discussion Plans for the holidays
"Thanksgiving is all set. I'm going north to be with my two sisters, one of them has a husband, and there will be 3 of the younger generation about. This is the first Thanksgiving without my Mom - I'm feeling this more than my husband being…"
Oct 16
vintage56(barb) replied to Booklvr's discussion Husband died just 1 week ago
"Ditto to what Callie said. The first week or so I was not alone, had friends and family staying with me. You just have to get through it one day at a time, maybe one hour at a time. Take care of yourself. If you want to eat ice cream for breakfast,…"
Oct 14

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Comment Wall (3 comments)

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At 1:33pm on January 3, 2017, diacon said…

Thank you. I don't know what wanting to be my friend means - but thank you for wanting to be my friend!  I appreciate your understanding and acknowledgement of the differences among lonely, alone and lonesomeness.  When I was in a grief group shortly after my spouse died, I collected things that people (albeit well meaning) said and sent them on to  the facilitator.  She (thankfully) is using them.  They are similar to something I saw on this site.  In many ways I would like to move on and in many ways I really don't want to.  Anyone relate?  Thanks.  

At 12:44pm on January 28, 2016, Ted'sRed said…

Thank you for the comment and the friend request, Barb.  I couldn't agree more.  My profile picture was my husband's favorite one of us because it captures the essence of our love (well, at least mine for him - LOL - but it was very much mutual).

At 10:48pm on February 6, 2015, eliana said…

Welcome to Widville, vintage56. I am truly sorry for your loss, and hope you find caring support and friendship here.

Here's the best place to start: Need help using the site? Ask here!  You can join the Groups that fit you to connect to others with similar experiences. Share your story. Take a look at our Forum discussions where you'll find meaningful conversations taking place. I look forward to getting to know you here in Widville. Take care of yourself.

 
 
 

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