Members

This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

All Blog Posts (4,195)

How to handle telemarketers

For 2 1/2 years I got calls for Arlene on my cell asking for her so they could try to sell her diabetic testing supplies. And until six months ago, I would scream and curse at them (ok, it was fun and thereaputic, but clearly ineffective). So tonight at work, I got another one of those calls, at work and gave what is now my standard response:

Them: Hello, may I speak to Arlene?

Me: She's not here, but I can give you the number where she may be reached.

Them: Ok…

Continue

Added by Don on October 12, 2017 at 2:20pm — 3 Comments

Enforced leisure - still recovering

I was  told on Friday I may be able to drive at the end of next week, I am so looking forward to that, it is over a month now since I had the operation on my leg and graft and I have spent most of that time with my leg elevated.  Luckily I always have many meals frozen in advance in my freezer and friends have been kind and brought me fruit ( I can't eat chocolates...lol) so I haven't starved. The major frustration for me is that Spring is here and I can't get out into the garden to do all…

Continue

Added by only1sue on September 24, 2017 at 4:52am — 5 Comments

Hornet...on WILLING YOU STRENGTH!

As surreal as it seems…tomorrow is the 4th anniversary of my husband’s death. Unbelievable.

I don’t visit Widville as much as I used to…I have literally buried myself in work over the last few years, but I log in every now and then to see how everyone is doing. I have to…this site helped me more than I can tell you, and now, I have the honor of offering my help as well…for whatever it may be worth.

Also, it is my way of honoring the wonderful man…

Continue

Added by Hornet (Cindy) on September 22, 2017 at 8:30pm — 1 Comment

The Continuous vigilance

I've been trying to dissect the emotion, trying to understand the root cause of it.Pinpoint the individual issues, which I'm sure there are many, and attack it head-on. As I've stated before I want to go face-to-face with this emotion, not hide from it but manage it. Not control it, but manage it.



A thought rolled through my brain the other day about how someone in love has a continuous vigilance over the health and well-being of their relationship. Not just once in awhile but at… Continue

Added by mls64 (Mike) on September 22, 2017 at 11:42am — 3 Comments

Role reversal,

If it were you passing away, what would you tell your spouse? What advice or direction would you give?



For some people here there was time to have those conversations.

My wife and I had time but it was a conversation I could not handle. But I wonder about those that lost loved ones unexpectedly.

Some of us were fortunate enough to receive a blessing from our spouses, to eventually move forward and others here were not.



Those precious words from a departed loved… Continue

Added by mls64 (Mike) on September 17, 2017 at 1:29pm — 9 Comments

One Year

I can’t believe it has been a year since I last saw his face, held him, and hugged him in that way that always made me feel so loved. When I buried my face in his neck, almost every day, I knew that he loved me and I loved him. We had a special relationship, and it is still hard to imagine that it is gone.

I’m…

Continue

Added by lowrsr (Sherry) on September 16, 2017 at 5:58pm — 4 Comments

Ridiculous tales a Widowed Mother: The Bunny Book

Most of the situations I find myself in since my husband past are sad.  Some are empowering and some just make me laugh at the ridiculousness of them.  I sometimes think of what a person look in on us or maybe walking in to the room would think.  Mostly I think of what our guardian angel thinks and how often he laughs at his family's many adventures.

Recently a friend gifted us a book about grief.  There are a number of children's books about grief.  There is one that I feel is…

Continue

Added by Orb101214 on September 15, 2017 at 10:57am — 2 Comments

Hornet…Just As It Should Be

It was February 8, 2017, three and a half years after I lost Rick.

I finally removed the wedding ring from my finger.

 

I never thought seriously about taking it off until then. It was as much a part of me as the hand that wore it.

 

My hand was alternating between aching and going numb, and my finger was swelled above the ring. Also, upon closer inspection, I finally realized that the knuckle of that finger was wider than the ring sitting beneath…

Continue

Added by Hornet (Cindy) on September 9, 2017 at 7:58pm — 5 Comments

Gypsy Widow

I was on the road for two months. I started July 10th, 2017 leaving the beautiful Colorado Rocky Mountains and headed North to Swan Valley, ID. This trip took me thru Wyoming into Idaho where I stayed with my friends on their 9 acre property where the Snake River runs through.

I truly loved Swan Valley and I have to say my two black labs loved the area more than I. From the moment we pulled up and I opened the door to let my four legged kids out after a long days drive they ran…

Continue

Added by Gypsy on September 8, 2017 at 8:40pm — 1 Comment

Life sometimes changes fast

Life sometimes changes fast as all we widows and widowers know. I have just spent a week in hospital six out of seven days on bed rest. I had a spot that looked like a mole on my leg, behind my left knee.  Over the past couple of months it grew so I went to my doctor who then referred me to a Skin Cancer Clinic where it was removed under local anesthetic.  A week later I was in surgery in a major hospital having a further surgery this time an extra area to take a "good margin off" to ensure…

Continue

Added by only1sue on September 7, 2017 at 9:59pm — 6 Comments

"Healing and surviving"

November 22nd will be the 1 year anniversary of my wife’s death.

I don't know how I will feel that day, but I know I don't want to spend it alone.…

Continue

Added by soulmate on September 6, 2017 at 10:30am — 2 Comments

The Movie "Everything Went Down" available on Amazon - A Tender Story of a Grieving College Professor and a Songwriter Who has Lost Her Creative Side

A tender movie I have found dealing with the loss of a spouse from a man's point of view is "Everything Went Down". This is an independent movie by Dustin Morrow and is about a college professor who lost his wife two years earlier. During this time, he feels numbing grief due to his loss and is the shell of a person. He meets a young songwriter who has lost her creative side for music. The two develop a friendship over the next few weeks and this helps him to overcome his loss while she…

Continue

Added by Mark62 on September 5, 2017 at 5:16am — No Comments

The Movie "Another Forever" on Netflix - A Tender Story About Grieving After the Loss of a Spouse and the Importance of Friends During This Time

On Netflix, there is a tender, heart touching movie, "Another Forever", that is about a grieving woman who is overtaken by the loss of her beloved husband. After her loss, she takes a spontaneous trip to visit a close friend to get her life back on track. The scenery is beautiful, taking place in several countries. Daniela Escobar stars as Alice who loses her husband suddenly and then deals with moving her life forward again, while remembering the moments they shared. The independent movie,…

Continue

Added by Mark62 on September 5, 2017 at 5:05am — No Comments

Separating emotion from logic...

To start let me give a quick history. My wife Teri and I were married for a little more than 24 years. Four daughters, two granddaughters. We found out this January that she had cancer. She passed on July 3rd.

Like most everyone else here, the sense of loss is all-consuming.

The "what will I do now" question applies to us all.

I've read countless posts, and for the most part I can relate to the writer.

However, I don't want to just relate to other posts, I want a… Continue

Added by mls64 (Mike) on August 30, 2017 at 7:31am — 10 Comments

Being a widowed parent...........

Juggling a full time job and part time job, cleaning the house, doing the laundry, doing the grocery shopping, making all of the meals, making sure the car is properly maintained, taking care of three “high maintenance/special needs” pets, doing all of the yard work (including snow removal each winter), paying the bills, worrying about finances, raising a teenage son and making sure all of his needs are being met as well as taking care of myself, is really, really unbelievably hard. Being…

Continue

Added by journey on August 24, 2017 at 6:29am — 4 Comments

What the eyes don't see

My mother spent a lot of time growing up with an aunt, her mother's older sister.  The aunt spoke often in what we would call cliches or truisms and Mum used a lot of them herself.  Some I agreed with like :  "A stitch in time saves nine" how often did I wish I had mended the falling hem earlier, and "A watched pot never boils" so I had to learn to do something else while I waited for something to cook.  One I have trouble with today is: "What the eye don't see, the heart don't grieve."…

Continue

Added by only1sue on August 21, 2017 at 6:43pm — No Comments

My Grief Is a Child

my grief is a child

wild and unpredictable

stormy and sweet

whiny with dirty fingernails

and sticky fingers.

I need time away

and yet, I also can not stay

away

because it needs me

and I am in love.

It is my child-

our child that we made

together.

It is what is left of us

It is full of us

always just around the 

corner-

playful and demanding

with wet kisses.

He…

Continue

Added by OriRising on August 15, 2017 at 12:47pm — 1 Comment

A week away does me good

I have been away for just over a week, I flew out to Broken Hill as the distance is too great to drive alone.  I stayed with one son and together we drove for seven hours to visit my other son and his family.  This is the only way I have managed to do that trip. I stayed with my younger son at a time when he had his daughter on access, we had a few fun days and then she got sick and we had two unhappy days with her.  That is life when you have a pre-schooler and he always says he loves her…

Continue

Added by only1sue on August 1, 2017 at 8:26pm — 6 Comments

First Funeral Anniversary

Today one year ago was Sandy's funeral. The last time I was able to tuck her in to rest peacefully forever. Sandy always went to bed well before I did most nights and I would frequently come up to bed and have to remove her glasses and tuck her in as she would fall asleep reading or watching tv. So one year ago today when I tucked her in and covered her up in the casket is a memory I will never forget. Don't get me wrong it was tough then and also thinking about it now, but am grateful I was…

Continue

Added by MissingMySandyBeach (Steve) on July 29, 2017 at 9:47am — 2 Comments

I'm having a big crying day

It's been 13 months. My wife Carla died June 12, 2016. Sunday is her birthday but she's dead so she's not getting any older. I am 47 and I get older every year, but Carla will always be 56. If I ever hear anyone complain about turning 60, I want to punch them.

I was doing reasonably well. In fact, I'm much better now…

Continue

Added by Anna on July 20, 2017 at 8:30am — 1 Comment

Monthly Archives

2017

2016

2015

2014

2013

2012

2011

2010

2009

2008

1999

© 2017   Created by Soaring Spirits.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service