As a family we all enjoyed sitting together on Wednesday evenings and Watching Modern Family. There was one particular episode in which the Claire, Phil and the kids were out with an old car and the car starts rolling down this big hill and Claire yells to Phil, "What's the plan Phil?" After that episode the kids would repeat that line to their father countless times.... what's the plan Tom.... not once did in our wildest dreams think that this was the plan, because it wasn't, it isn't.…Continue
but no one hears
If in a dream
though no sound comes out
My head below the surface
of a water so deep
in the deception
of an imposed silence
This second language
so painful to learn
I stumble on my words
that many will not hear
and few will understand
Added by Tess on May 27, 2020 at 6:00am — No Comments
It is raining the cold rain of winter. The weather changed last week, before that it was warm days, cool nights but now the nights are really cold. Yesterday afternoon I spent two hours looking for my hot water bottle. I knew it was in a blue, green and yellow cover I had knitted myself. When I finally found it it was in a bright pink cover on which the words "I'm a Hottie" were written in a bold black. This was a jokey gift from my son-in-law for my birthday last year. Now how did I miss…Continue
Added by only1sue on May 24, 2020 at 7:00pm — No Comments
Arlene's birthday was 2 weeks ago, the first half of June brings the Strokaversary, the deathaversary and our anniversery of the day we met. So what happened yesterday, just to pile on? I had my job eliminated.
I've always found this to be the perfect explanation of grief waves.
I lost my husband Feb 1. My grandson saw him have the heart attack. He had COPD for many years and was diagnosed with heart failure in Nov. He went downhill so quickly. He had a valve that was regurgitating and nothing they could do. He could not eat, drink, he lost weight like crazy. He never lost his mind....always sharp. I am 52, he was 69. We met in church. We were best friends before we ever dated. In fact I became a Christian at that church. I…Continue
I have been self isolating for over six weeks. Yesterday I heard someone complain she had been home from work for two weeks. I guess that is the difference between being young and being old. I see the sense in self isolating if the over 70s seem to be the target group for this virus but it is hard for a socially minded person like me to be held to ransome by this situation, my isolation for the good of my health. I feel as if I am being robbed of something special. I think it is a common…Continue
This morning while doing my norm, having coffee talking to friends, reading over the FB happenings. I found my eyes leaking. I wiped away the first few teardrops but they just kept coming. To my shock, I realized I was crying big silent tears. Why? I had to search myself for a reason, I'd like to say I was crying real grief tears because then I'd…Continue
Eleven years yesterday my beloved and i would have celebrated being married for 11 years.! As i think feeling gutted as i do that i wanted; wait no; The kids and i needed at least 10 more years forsure at the very very least, but then on the other hand, i think well at least we had those 10years, begrudgingly though, i really wanted at least 50 more... And then i think about the kids and how i have been lucky to have both of my parents still to this day and how i couldnt imagine my…Continue
Added by CryinCali on April 25, 2020 at 8:16pm — No Comments
I love podcasts and enjoy listening to anything positive and uplifting. While I was grieving I couldn’t find any meaningful podcast on grief. I was looking for something real and relevant that would provide me with practical advice on how to get through the fog of my grief. I decided as part of my healing and grief journey to start my own podcast. This isn’t a venture to make money but to help other grievers find useful tips. The podcast consist of interviews with other grievers and grief…Continue
Everyday I wake up to be in this nightmare of a life that is not one that I want to be in, instead of this nightmare being when I sleep it exists while I am awake where I remember you are no longer with me and I need to navigate this by myself. At night, I have the possibility of dreaming with you, hugging you and kissing you the way it should be when I am awake but it is not. I keep wondering when will this life feel different one day, will I be able to move on or is this what my new…Continue
Added by Shugarts on April 9, 2020 at 12:16pm — No Comments
She knew that a bay and rocks and trees bending over the surf cannot relieve sadness---can sadness be relieved, or can one only pass it by very slowly?
A day in the radiant sunlight and the sky’s blue, in the shadow of a proud dark sail, over rustling waves, along new coastlines, wouldn’t that help to get past sadness?---for a while, for that one day at least.
Maria Dermoût --- The Ten Thousand Things
Added by pricytapestry on April 3, 2020 at 6:30am — No Comments
With the current crazy times, I'm trying to blog a few times a week. Here's my latest (My first in along time) about trying not fall into self-doubt while having more time alone. Take care. http://www.thehungoverwidow.com/our-inner-critics-in-the-time-of-quarantine/.
Added by The Hungover Widow on April 1, 2020 at 12:15pm — No Comments
Has the world gone mad? My last blog was only two weeks ago and I was reminiscing about my cruise telling you my operation was coming up and resting up so I would be fit for whatever lay ahead. Well was I the innocent one? I never imagined the mess of life as we know it that a tiny international visitor called Covid-19 would make to our lives. Who would have thought that from remote China it could spread around the world so quickly and so plunge the world into chaos? It wasn't in the news…Continue
The flowers from the funeral are just about dead. All of the out of town relatives have left. The food that people brought over is just about gone or ready to be thrown out. The phone doesn't ring that much. Not very many texts coming in. No more sympathy cards in the mail. Tomorrow will be two weeks since my partner of 15 years, John, died of what is assumed to be a massive heart attack. He was already gone by the time I found him. He was 54 years old. The last two weeks have been a blur.…Continue
Added by Impala Princess on March 22, 2020 at 6:41pm — No Comments
I am thankful I went on my cruise before the cruise companies decided to cancel future cruises for six weeks or more. I could have missed that time of exploration and relaxation. I am having another operation next week so I thought I would do a "before" blog and an "after"blog. I am feeling fine, I went to my doctor today and all of the conditions he was worried about have marginally improved so he was no longer anxious to get me on all sorts of medication. This is good as at the beginning…Continue
I look at a picture taken for church in 2013 and I see this woman in the photo. She looks familiar; a distant memory of someone I once knew comes to mind. She is so happy, and her eyes are lit up like the beautiful stars of the heavens in an evening sky where all you can see is their brilliance, their amazing bright twinkle. How lucky that woman is, how very lucky. And I think to myself what I would give to be her and have that love that is so vibrantly shown in the smiles of…Continue
It will be 5 years this March 2020 that I lost my Rock, my partner. Two years in I finally caved and said ok to selling our home and decided to buy a truck and travel trailer that year that I listed the property. So, for 3 months while the property was up for sale I just traveled and it was such a great relief. So here I am coming up on year 5 and realize I am missing him even more and the best medicine has always been travel.
So, if anyone is interested and ready, lets look at…Continue
I've done very little of it, and except for one place that we only went to three times tops, and I always have to set up a picture of Arlene on my phone to get thru it. I have been saying for the last 4 1/2 years that I couldn't see myself eating in our old places (thankfully most have changed hands aren't the same). Today I had this thought that its probably time for me to rip the bandaid off and go to one, or several, depending on how it goes. Just not THIS weekend, Effin V-day. But soon.…Continue
Due to the confusion of the seasons in the past few years, I have decided that seasons are irrelevant. We can have hot and humid days followed by a twenty degree drop in temperature and then grey skies for days. I remember my mother's expression: "It's just s phase we're going through" and I think that explains it. We are simply going through uncertain weather phases. We have taken those good seasons for granted, December warm, January and February hot, sunny days in school holidays for…Continue