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February 2018 Blog Posts (9)

Two days before the operation

The waiting is almost over, it seems a long time since it was mentioned and in two days time  the operation will be over. I have just carried on with my usual routine, no sense in doing one of those "bucket list" gestures. I am somewhat of a fatalist so figure it will work out well and if it doesn't then I will have to learn to cope. Since all the tests and xrays started I have heard some very inspiring stories so know I am walking in giant's footsteps.

Friends have offered…


Added by only1sue on February 17, 2018 at 10:00pm — 2 Comments

9 years........WOW ! And I’m still here.

Hello everyone, my name is Steve and I am approaching my partners birthday and the 9th anniversary of his passing.  I have so many feelings and thoughts I would like to share here, but so many times before, I prepare to sit down and post a blog about what I’m going through, or what I’m feeling, and I type a whole bunch of things, spend an hour composing and putting down my thoughts, then I decide to erase it all and forget about posting for the time being.  

Im going to try to not…


Added by Steve on February 17, 2018 at 7:36pm — 1 Comment

Staying positive amid despair

This morning, I woke up and the first thing I thought about naturally was Jerry.  He's been the first thing I've thought about for years. Usually, I'd roll over and snuggle; today I stared at our picture.  I wondered what advice he'd give me.  I wondered what was going through his mind two months after he lost his wife.  Jerry was such a confident man.  He nearly always looked on the bright side.  He almost always embraced and adapted to circumstances beyond his control.  I so admired his…


Added by Rainy (Misty) on February 17, 2018 at 10:00am — 6 Comments

Alone on the Farm

Last night was the first night I've spent alone on the farm.  My kids were here, but they are kids.  My "step-daughter" and her family share 40 acres with me.  They took a weekend trip.  It was eerily quiet and dark out here.  I felt really alone. 

It's strange how little things like that make me feel vulnerable and achy.  I ache for Jerry, he was the kind of man that made one feel safe.  I was never afraid when he was here.  There are so many small adjustments to make.  In attitude,…


Added by Rainy (Misty) on February 16, 2018 at 4:30am — 2 Comments

My child can't catch a break!

As most you know, that chat with me.  My children lost their father Dec1 and stepfather Dec 14 of 2017.   This week their uncle died (fathers brother) unexpectedly.  Last night a school friend was in a car accident and is not going to make it.  Two more friends were seriously injured.  Then I look at FB and see that the step-father of a friend has been killed along with another family member.  Checked the news website and realize they were in the other car.  It seems like it's way too much…


Added by Rainy (Misty) on February 14, 2018 at 8:42am — 5 Comments



The abscense of a previously shared presence.

The reality that your beloved is no longer present.  That the presence belongs to what  was.  

You feel the absence.

What is left is what it - the prsence - felt like.

The pain is in the…


Added by Lev on February 14, 2018 at 12:30am — 3 Comments

Not doing so good


Here I am 2 years later. the First year with this New lady in my life was amazing. then something happened  I do not know what,

she seemed to be Pushing away from me.. locks herself in the bedroom , days , weeks at a time.  My mom came to Visit.  she did  leave the room the entire week my mom was here.  We had a  tree fall into the house.  she was in the room for over a month. apparently came out  while I was at work.

 now she is demanding. does not speak to me. …


Added by hog659(Neal) on February 7, 2018 at 9:42am — 4 Comments

Destiny ... How I Soar

The magical way Vern and I found one another has always made me believe it was divine guidance that brought us together. He chose me. Me? Yes, me! That just turned 18 year old kid who knew deep down inside her that life had more in store than what she could see. But she was too afraid to take a chance and came so very, very close to settling for something that would have been such a huge mistake.

Oh, the summer of ’69. One little change of course. Not so little actually.



Added by Dianne in Nevada on February 1, 2018 at 9:54am — 6 Comments

How I Soar

Michele Neff Hernandez, my friend and the amazing woman who created…


Added by Dianne in Nevada on February 1, 2018 at 9:45am — 1 Comment

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