This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

April 2015 Blog Posts (17)

Curiosity wants to know

Curiosity.  I encourage it in my kids. It's seen as a positive trait- both socially and at the workplace.  But for me, 3 years out into my Widowhood journey, its what I hold my breath wishing against.  I just don't like to be forced to pull out the Widow card anymore.  You know the one- the card that gets stuck to your forehead whenever someone who doesn't know you quite that well asks a question you can't possibly answer truthfully without…


Added by OriRising on April 30, 2015 at 10:41am — No Comments

"Special Memory" You will always be, a special part of meYou will always be, a special memoryI'll always cherish wonderfull moments you have given meYou are in my heart, where ever I may beAll the ti…

"Special Memory"

You will always be, a special part of me

You will always be, a special memory

I'll always cherish wonderfull moments you have given me

You are in my heart, where ever I may be

All the times we've shared, will always be close to me

Songs my heart will sing, refreshing melody

I'll put together all of your laughter like a symphony

I'll remember you, where ever I may be…

Added by judy on April 28, 2015 at 6:46am — No Comments

about being a widow

I'm sitting here on Sunday morning thinking about last night's event.

It was a fundraiser for a school I used to work at.  It was great to see people from my past and reconnect with them. 

When I reached the table where I was assigned to sit it was…


Added by bis4betsy on April 26, 2015 at 7:24am — 9 Comments

Widow ,what a sad name :(

I am a widow,the word sounds so sad .like an abandoned child unloved and desperate to survive.This is my first blog and I hope I make sense as I speak out my mind .

I will not get into my life because that's not the purpose of my blog.Its to get right into feeling sad and bursting frustrated and wanting to scream ....

I am a 56 year old woman who just realized how tough it is to be a woman alone .we seem to suddenly become this 'available' woman open to the advances of all sorts of… Continue

Added by Denise on April 24, 2015 at 5:59am — 7 Comments

The Rollercoaster Ride

It's a fairground ride none of us want to be on, no big queues to get a seat on here, no rave reviews of how 'you have to take a ride'.

It's the Rollercoaster from hell, price of admission is the loss of your soul mate, having them ripped from your life in an instant.

It doesn't matter if you knew it was coming or not, that final parting is brutal and far far worse than anything you imagined.

It's like having a grenade detonated in the centre of your life leaving you alone,… Continue

Added by TG (Trudi) on April 24, 2015 at 2:00am — 1 Comment

It is finally setting in, he is gone.

This week has been rough, it is not an anniversary of anything, or a sadiversary since his death, but a few things this week have triggered me to finally recognize that this HAS happened and he is NOT coming home.

Sunday a friend of mine, who had never been out to where we lived, came out to pick me up. She walked inside our room and saw the hodgepodge of Blaine's stuff and my stuff mixed together. She looked down at a shoe rack under the desk and said "are all of…


Added by ShelisJenkins (TiffanyLynn) on April 22, 2015 at 5:58am — 7 Comments

Lessons Learned As A Touchstone To A Loved One

A few nights ago I went out with my girlfriends to celebrate our spring birthdays together.  We saw a show, shared a meal and had lots of laughs, hugs and lots of love. It was a lovely night, a night in many ways I had to attribute to John.

I was a bit surprised to find myself whispering ‘thank you, thank you John’ as I walked by myself to the bathroom before the show. I was overwhelmed with gratitude for him, for him teaching me to seek out, plan for and expect there to be…


Added by flannery on April 21, 2015 at 7:00pm — 1 Comment

Déjà u

so my kids went to grief camp this weekend! They had an incredible time. We were so blessed with the opportunity for them to go! We got home at 7:30pm! At 8:05 my best friend called saying her husband was having chest pains and that she was at dinner with a friend and was heading home to him. I got there right after she did and drove her husband to the hospital as she had a few drinks at dinner and had been driven home by her friend! Of course it's the same hospital that my husband passed away… Continue

Added by RVLlover on April 19, 2015 at 10:27pm — No Comments

One week until THE date

Tomorrow is Monday.  Just a Monday.  No significant date.  Except that it's a week from the one year anniversary of Eric's death.  I'm starting to feel the butterflies, the anxiety.  I'm afraid I'm going to give into the sobs.  Not the little teary eyed that I get now and then, but the heart wrenching, exhausting, body racking sobs.  I haven't had any in quit some time.  I'm afraid of them.  I'm afraid of how they make me feel.  I'm afraid of how they make my daughter feel.  How can I stop…


Added by MrsFreddy on April 19, 2015 at 8:42pm — 1 Comment

What the Hospice Grief Pamphlet Didn't Prepare Me For... the anger. I'm so angry. At myself. At everyone. 

My fiance, Philip, died on 2/10/15 from terminal colon cancer. We only found he was sick on 12/20/14. He was sick and dying for six weeks...well that we knew about. I'm 31 and he was 35. We weren't prepared and I certainly was not prepared for the speed at which things happened. We had been together for seven years and only just gotten engaged. Overnight we went from planning our October 2015 wedding to learning about hospice,…


Added by CandJ02 on April 16, 2015 at 9:11pm — 8 Comments


Today I was talking to my therapist about work and life and how hard this transition time is while I try to learn how to manage and build the necessary muscles for being a full time working solo parent. As we talked about how I should think about a strategy for the future or an exit strategy if needed for my current job, we talked about how I know that I can do anything as long as I know it is finite. And then I had a breakthrough.

Ron is dead. He is going to stay dead. He is not on a…


Added by MissingRKK on April 15, 2015 at 6:10pm — 5 Comments

about today

"It's just a date on a calendar."  she said.  

But on this date everything about my life changed. 

I mark time by that date.  Everything is before it or after it.

I try to make it an ordinary day.  I do everything I usually do.  Inside my…


Added by bis4betsy on April 14, 2015 at 5:49pm — 2 Comments

How do we decide to change?

Someone sent me a picture on Facebook, one of many i get every day.  The words said:  

"I just woke up today and decided I didn't want to feel like this any more, or ever again.  So I changed.   I had lots of excuses for not being able to change, but at the end of the day they were excuses.  Being able to change starts with Your decision to change. (This quote is attributed to Steven Aitchison at Your Thoughts Today)

I stared at this for a while and suddenly…


Added by only1sue on April 13, 2015 at 1:18pm — 4 Comments

Hornet on A Man Who Is Loved

I am embarrassed to admit it…even to all of you. I just finalized the order for the cemetery marker a few weeks ago.


I didn’t realize it until now how grueling the last 19 months have been thinking about it, researching it, completing it.

But it is really beautiful. It is a large piece of gleaming bronze mounted on warm, slightly-pink marble with photos of us etched in it. A beautiful phrase, precise dates, full names, all presented in a graceful…


Added by Hornet (Cindy) on April 12, 2015 at 7:41pm — 3 Comments

Getting it out....



Added by Stevensgirl61 on April 7, 2015 at 11:38am — 4 Comments

Strangers Like Me

In a very round about way I found Widowed Village.

One side of my heart says- finally some people who get what you've been through and continue to go through.

The other side says- is it helpful to you to hang out with people who have the same problems you do?

I have no answer.

Except that the gracious way I have been instantly embraced by this community is refreshing.  I don't have to explain anything. They…


Added by bis4betsy on April 5, 2015 at 7:00pm — 3 Comments

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