Sometimes it is such a relief to have Christmas over. For the first time in five years it was family lunch my place for Christmas. Because I was busy volunteering with Lions, selling tickets in the Christmas raffle etc it was hard to find time to shop so I did a combination of gifts and money. Thankfully that went over well, and everything went well with the meal too. I was grateful that my oldest grand daughter remembered how we set up for family gatherings and helped with that. The three…Continue
Added by only1sue on December 25, 2019 at 12:00pm — No Comments
Don’t Look So Sad
He unfolded the note, the last note she ever wrote, and read…..
Don’t look so sad, my darling husband, I know it’s over. But life will go on, and the whole world will just keep right on a turning. Just be glad we had some time to spend together. There’ll be time enough for sadness when I’m gone. So, lay your head upon my pillow, and hold my warm and tender body next to yours, And let's pretend we still have forever………
…….. He stopped there, for he couldn’t…
Ricardo i love u mi amor my heart breaks everyday alil more without u. A lil longer from the last time i saw your beautiful smile your deep dark eyes and your flawless olive skin. How i wish oh how i wish for one more kiss one more touch one more moment of anything with u. I feel lost and lonely like a child that has lost there way home . you ment so much to us .i have been trying my best but i fear so many things for my future without u. This is likec a nightmare that i will never…Continue
Oh baby my sweet husband i scream uuuugggh then one heavy sigh as i look at your beautiful face in all the pictures around the house. I get up and walk to another room as if for a second trying to get away from the saddness and weight of grief i feel weighing on me after times of looking at photos until my mind goes to that unfullfiled future that we had talked about always together even growing old but then that when it happens the feeling of having to get away…
This time of the year is hard for me. We don't have Thanksgiving in Australia, the convicts hauled from England to colonise our country didn't have much to be thankful for. We have summer and school holidays and the run up to Christmas all lumped in together and life gets very busy. Add unseasonable heat and drought and bushfires causing smokey air all over the coast and all the external circumstances and it gets pretty tiring. So sometimes I want it to just be over. December is party…Continue
When I count my blessings true, on this day of thankfulness, and find you there still in my past, I count the memories sweet and true, how I remember you and smile.
I cuddle up next to a warm thought, a memory I find of you, and count my blessings of days gone by, when love was new, and love was true, and danced around within my heart, treasured thoughts I find of you.
It hurts to see you gone, and feel the loss of your sweet love and the pain of losing you, and I'm thankful…Continue
The Essence Of A Name
And Its Unspoken Nature
Sleepless In Seattle captured the heartbreaking essence of widowhood. I was watching it unfold layer by layer the unthinkable loss of widowhood when I signed up with Soaring Spirits. It spoke to me from the sadness of my heart. They said I needed a fictitious name. That was all I could think of at the time. So I became “Sleepless In Seattle” in more ways then I care to be, I became like all of you, the essence of the…Continue
Does anyone out there do homeschooling?Continue
Added by Sleepless In Seattle on November 26, 2019 at 5:58pm — No Comments
Touched When You couldn’t Be Helped
The Velvet Writer
There was a man, who, in the course of time was lost in a crash. He never disappeared nor was he ever found. It seemed as though he had vanished, as though in a fog, but still there, and yet, he just couldn’t be found in his present state of being, he was lost in another place frozen in time. His voice fading in the distance could still be heard drifting nearer than ever. When you looked, he was quite…Continue
Added by Sleepless In Seattle on November 26, 2019 at 5:44pm — No Comments
When Love Dies
When love dies it’s hard to resurrect no matter how many tears you shed to water it.
Ther’s a bittersweet misery in missing someone you’ve lost that’s hard to understand and impossible to explain. It drawls you close while tearing you apart. It’s like confetti coming down on a melancholy moment, celebrating the life you had together, somewhat like snow in the dead of winter, a lifeless time in your life. Your numb, you feel nothing, but every thought…Continue
Added by Sleepless In Seattle on November 23, 2019 at 4:51pm — No Comments
When Love Calls the Heart
Passing through widowhood is teary at best. Divorced and widowed is twice as hard. One is as bad as the other when love calls the heart.
The night winds blow and loneliness surrounds you. Thinking out loud is a strange thing. The sound of your own voice echoing down the hall and back is almost creepy. You fall asleep at the keyboard and your thoughts spill out in unintelligent keystrokes, and your reader thinks your nuts. Tears are a…Continue
I went back to my old neighborhood last week and found that the house Frank and I had built and lived in for almost 25 years had been torn down by the people we sold it to. Makes me sad, first he is gone and now our house is gone. We actually built it all ourselves, it was perfect for the two of us and it was built with love.
Sometimes it seems like I am the only one who remembers him anymore. His family has not contacted me in over a year (4 grown kids, his not mine, his…Continue
Where do we find it?
The will to breathe another breath
How can we pull it?
The strength to move through this pain
We can we see it?
The love that remains in our thoughts despite the loss
Where do we feel it?
Our hearts that was broken yet still strong
Where does it come from?
Our love one that continue to guide us through,always with us
Added by Mrs Bear on November 11, 2019 at 12:35am — No Comments
As a widow I try to live life one day at a time. As a member of a couple both when Ray was well and afterwards when he had the series of strokes I would plan at least three weeks ahead. Now I am not that optimistic, I do put all my engagements on the calendar and hope nothing happens in between but I no longer have the confidence that life will happen the way I plan it. I used to be a really confident person but somewhere in the past seven years that changed. Maybe it is something to do with…Continue
But really, I don't want to go, Short of pulling the "W" card, how do I get out of this? I'd be going alone, I don't do weddings well anyway and about the last thing I want to deal with is risking a DUI, because I WILL drink at it and its in New Jersey and I live on Staten Island, so a cab isn't an option. How the Hell do I get out of this gracefully?
As the sun slips into the morning sky, the rays pierce my tired eye. I rise to start another day, lost without you trying to find my way. Sleepless nights to avoid the dreams, wading through a torrent of screams. Trying to find peace of mind, losing my soul in this daily grind. Wandering under a sky so blue, I stumble through these thoughts of you. Another day comes to an end, these letters I've written with nowhere to send.Continue
October 16, he would have been 61. We would have celebrated. I would have made him a birthday apple pie. Instead, I will be at Arlington National Cemetery to bury the ashes of my husband, the love of my life. When the funeral planner finally called to set a date, I chose his birthday for a few reasons, the first being that this former day of celebration has turned into another hard, sad day to get through. Rather than add another sad event date to the calendar, I will honor his wishes to…Continue
This is the week.
This is the week Ron finally went to the doctor, after I came back to Jakarta from the US for my father's memorial service and came back with a raging respiratory infection and Samantha's asthma was acting up so Ron was 3rd to go to the doctor.
This is the week where Ron looked at me across our bedroom and said,"what if it is something serious?" and I said, "It won't be, but if it is, we will deal with it."
This is the week where after the ultrasound…Continue
I went to the Lymphodema Clinic to get fitted with my new pressure garments, while the waist to knee garment was a good fit the stockings, knee to toe were too long. The fitter phoned the distributor to ask why the wrong size had been supplied the answer came back : " We no longer supply the size you requested....". That same answer applies to so many different aspects of my life for instance the spare parts for repairing taps etc, living in an older house as I do I can no longer get a…Continue
Just started to come out of my depression fog after losing my husband unexpectedly 15 months ago, today I get news that they found a lump on my brothers pancreas. He had been losing so much weight. I can't cope with this, I am not emotionally ready to even think about this. I want to escape again from reality. But also my brother will need me. So shattered. Life is exhausting.