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July 2014 Blog Posts (30)

Son's First Haircut Without Dad

Who knew a trip to the barber could be so hard? I live in a wonderful town and my husband had been taking our 11 year old to the local barbershop for years. My son Collin had been putting off the trip, saying he wanted to go, but he wasn't ready. Yesterday, we went together.

It's one of many "firsts" he and I have had to navigate together, but this one hurt in a different way. He wanted to go, but I could tell by the look on his eyes as the dads brought their sons that it just… Continue

Added by Lakelady on July 13, 2014 at 9:52am — 1 Comment


Six weeks ago I decided to run away from home. Wanting to leave the crappy job I had and escape all the drama and chaos of family situations was not the initial thought that led me to the decision, but those things were most definitely deciding factors.

So, having put the original plan in motion and feeling like the change would lead to unimagined possibilities, I quit my job, sold/gave away 90% of everything I owned, put the rest in storage in Texas, packed the essentials in my car…


Added by AEDforever (Ali) on July 8, 2014 at 1:41pm — 4 Comments

One year - my letter to Toby

Dear Toby,

One year.

I have written you almost every day this past year. I written all of my experiences, my journeys, about the new people who have entered my life, my anger, my dark days, my good days, losing Shadow and Daytona, watching our family fall apart, about my loneliness that leaves me hollow, and how I’ve finally accepted being alone.…


Added by IndiaKai on July 7, 2014 at 6:30am — 8 Comments

Today is his birthday tomorrow is his death date

I sit by myself today in my backyard.  My husband would have been 37 today.  We would have been out our cabin, drinking beer and enjoying the long weekend.  Today, I sit by myself and wish him a very quiet happy birthday alone.  I have been a wreck for over a month dreading this weekend.  Today, I'm exhausted but calm. It's the calm that I hope stays with me to endure the one year mark tomorrow. 

Happy 37th birthday today wherever your journey has lead you my love.

Added by IndiaKai on July 6, 2014 at 2:47pm — 6 Comments

3 month mark...

I made it... don't know how... and can't remember doing anything remarkable in the past 3 months, but I made it.  (actually 3 months and 1 week) I"m still not sleeping... putting on the weight I lost (ugh) and have cried more times in a day then not... but I made it...correction... we made it.  Need to give credit to our son... he's doing amazing.  He's filling in your shoes the best he can, while still remaining a typical teenage boy.  The other day, you would have been so proud of him...…


Added by sugr-plum (shelly) on July 6, 2014 at 4:08am — 6 Comments

Auto Correct

It has been one year, 3 months and 20 days since my love lost his battle and died. I miss him more now than ever, and yet feel I have travelled a great distance on my journey of grief. The path is not straight and at times very dark, no lights to illuminate my way. But onward I go as life goes on and I am living by the conviction that I must treasure each day I have as a way of honouring my beloved loss. He did not have the opportunity to live his life to the full, so how could I ever… Continue

Added by Babs on July 4, 2014 at 5:26pm — No Comments

This Pretty Much Sums Up How I Feel

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever, because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the…


Added by Mac on July 4, 2014 at 7:00am — 6 Comments

His Birthday, and my Chapter Two

The sweetest thing happened to me on my husbands birthday. Yesterday would have been Dennis' 56th Birthday. The second birthday that he was robbed out of.

I lost my husband in October of 2012 to cancer. I never thought I would date again. I really didn't think I could find someone that understood my grief and wasn't threatened by the fact that I will always love my dead husband. I never thought it could really happen, until my husbands birthday.

My husband and I always had… Continue

Added by Karen on July 3, 2014 at 8:43am — 2 Comments

Should I be able to handle more than I do?

I feel I am getting stronger and then things fog up again, I start to miss meetings and events, my head is muzzy and I go around in a dream.  I find myself watching tv with no idea what I am watching and falling asleep and waking up two hours later.  I wonder why I am fine for a while and then suddenly it is like I am just a few weeks out from his death?  Tonight I turned to his chair to remark on a program I thought "we" were watching.  It is as if there is a time slip and all of a sudden I…


Added by only1sue on July 3, 2014 at 3:10am — 2 Comments

I lost an amazing man, friend, and someone that I truly loved two days ago. He gave me hope when I had none, he made me laugh when I thought I never would, and he made me believe I could love again e…

I lost an amazing man, friend, and someone that I truly loved two days ago. He gave me hope when I had none, he made me laugh when I thought I never would, and he made me believe I could love again even after my broken heart. He was traveling, we talked and he went to sleep but never woke up. I'm at such a loss. I can't see how I will ever be able to fight back again. Thank you Robert for everything you taught me, and for showing me I was worth loving. I'll miss you with every breath I take.… Continue

Added by Lisa (lost) Lamb on July 2, 2014 at 4:00pm — 9 Comments

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