I finally completed skim coating the walls in the kitchen and sanding them. They are now painted. It's not perfect but it looks 100% better than it did. I can live with it.
I started work on the stairs. I stringer and banister are metal and the steps are wood and bolted to the stringers. I removed the bolts and nuts and did clean everything. I now plan to paint the metal and put in new steps. I will have Home Depot cut me 13 steps from of 2 X 12's. The length of the steps is…Continue
I need a safe place to shed some more truths. A place that I feel comfortable and un-judged... a place to release and unload, to clear my head and ease my heart, and naturally, widowed village is that place.
For those of you who have been with me through my widowed journey, know that I have found love again. Nathan, my wonderful, remarkable widowed boyfriend who can handle my baggage, has changed my life. It's true, no matter how much baggage I think I have…Continue
Well, my first two posts on Widow Village ended up being 2 rants full of my hurt and my anger. Now some time has passed and after being able to talk to some good friends, I’m now not overwhelmed with emotions. I do feel very numb, though, it’s kind of like I have spent all my emotions and now I’m just trying to make it day by day. Often just moment by moment.
I am empty.
One very important thing you need to know about me is that I’m a Christian. Please…Continue
MY HUSBAND , PASSED TWO YEARS AGO TODAY , AND IT FEELS LIKE IT JUST
HAPPENED . I'VE BEEN TOLD NUMEROUS TIMES THAT HE IS IN A BETTER PLACE,
BUT THAT DOES'NT MAKE ME FEEL ANY BETTER . HE WASN'T PERFECT, AND AT
TIMES A REAL CHALLENGE BECAUSE HE MARCHED TO THE BEAT OF HIS OWN
MUSIC . I CALLED HIM A PAIN IN THE A** , AND HE WOULD TELL ME HE WAS MY
PAIN IN THE A**. THE STING IS JUST AS PAINFUL TODAY , AND I LOST COUNT OF
HOW MANY TIMES I HAD A TEARFUL…Continue
Yes, some days are just not good, and I have been experiencing a number of them in a row. I have no idea why, or what, or how. I just know that I'm terribly terribly sad. Depressed. Overwhelmed. Anxious. Not good.
I feel guilty about this. I have people counting on me to be ok and show them that it is ok to be ok. But, not so much right now. I feel like I need someone to lean on, tell me that it will really be ok. Tell me that they are in this with me and together we…Continue
I’ve just completed my third move since my husband Paul died. Tomorrow will be 1 year and 6 months since that day. I’ve spent the past week settling in, setting up my room, re-arranging it again, unpacking, hanging up clothes, and all the mundane things moving requires. I am renting a room in a very nice house in a very nice neighborhood. It is just me and the woman owner (whom I am friends with from a mutual association). She is downstairs and my room is upstairs with a big closet, and a…Continue
I am sitting here feeling lonely. Well nothing new about that, I've been doing that for the past two years since Ray went into the hospital then the nursing home and more so since he died last September. I am just more lonely now as the truth that he is NEVER coming back bites. He is NEVER coming back. He is not gone for a while, for a week, a month or a year. He is gone FOREVER.
I am surely not the only one thinking like this. It is a reality we all live with. We can put off…Continue
Hello All !!
Jocelyn and Gordy's Widow lit candles for you last night and this morning and another for all of us as I often do.Wedding anniversaries are tuff as a widowed godmother spells it to highlight how tough.But we are indeed a village.
Last weekend former Congresswoman Lindy Boggs of Louisiana died at age 97. Born Marie Corrine Morrison Claiborne later known as Lindy Boggs was born into a life of privilege. Her father was a successful lawyer who died when she was…Continue
I lit a votive candle at a special altar in our home and kept it lit all day. I had quiet time, and also some supportive phone talks with friends, and gently relived some memories of when we first met over 38 years…Continue
Thank you for letting
Billie feel it, surely he can some way
When I kiss
I feel my side
And so hope he feels us, too
Gazing into his eyes up close again
I feel almost sure he does
And so thank you Spirit
I have to admit that I am totally fascinated by tattoos. And tattoos seem to be everywhere and on everyone but on me.
The first tattoo I remember was a great-uncle who had a Popeye-like anchor on his forearm. It was dark blue and sort of faded, and I wondered where and why he got it. Because he was a chain smoker with a loud, barking cough whenever he spoke I never asked him about it, thinking that he would cough up a lung with his answer.
When I went…Continue
Added by barbstar54 on August 11, 2013 at 2:30am — No Comments
In the 4+ months since Barb has died (and even before when she was very sick), I have given a lot of thought to moving out of our house to another smaller, easier to care for house. It is hard to consider...I love our/my house, and I live in a neighborhood where I "know everyone" --when I walk my dog , I always run into people who I talk to, and sometimes have a glass or wine or beer with. My immediate neighbors are close friends who I share dinner and many good laughs with. Although I…Continue
I miss you. Wish you were here. This was supposed be our empty-nester phase. Things have been going pretty well for me. Certainly, better than expected.
Thank you for all of the gifts that you have left me. They are helping me in so many ways. The gift of our love. The…Continue
I hate that owing to Internet Security problems I could not share with you all the excitement I felt in the month of June during the build-up to my first holiday overseas alone. It is sad that the Internet is still so prone to hackers, scammers etc it is not safe to share that your home will be empty for five weeks.
So I got home last night, yes, I got home to MY house. At almost eleven months out is is "my home" now. And yes, plants died, leaves accumulated, rubbish built up and…Continue
I posted this when I came to widow village, it’s been a year since that day. I’m so grateful for the hope, voice, and love that you have all given me. Our loved ones will always be in our hearts and amazingly help us form our futures without them. Love you Mark….
Has anyone here had problems with gaining back a great weight loss since their spouse has passed away? While my husband was ill in hospital I weighed 142 lbs. I am 5' 6" tall and petite. After my husband passed away in Hospice I didn't eat a lot for the first 3 - 4 months as I was In a fog-like stupor. Then I started to eat like a horse, but the calories are not sticking to me and I now weight 90 lbs.! I have been to the doctor and demanded an Endoscopy only because my doctor felt I was…Continue
August is my least favorite month.I pretty much hate it. August 25 2007 is the date that my husband died. When August comes around, as it always does, I am thrown into a place that I thought I was past. I am sad, I am angry, I am filled with regret for what was, what should have been, what could have been, had cancer not stolen my husband away. We were not perfect people, although I have done my best to make Kevin a saint in the last 6 years. So if he is the saint, what does that make me?…Continue
Added by dublin53 on August 8, 2013 at 1:04pm — No Comments