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August 2013 Blog Posts (77)

Article: Dating After the Death of a Spouse

This article was a good read for anyone who has begun to date or is thinking about it.

http://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/relationship-issues/dating-after-death-of-spouse

Added by Mariposa on August 8, 2013 at 12:53pm — 4 Comments

32 Years and Forever More

A typical Sunday evening in my former life would find all of us busily organizing for the beginning of the week with eager anticipation so that we could sit down to take in the current episode of the Amazing Race.  It was clearly one of our favorite family shows.

 

A few years back I remember a task involving opening padlocks scattered amongst thousands on a bridge in Europe (I think?).  I can't remember the exact locale as apparently there are a few in Europe with these…

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Added by Nutmegsmama on August 7, 2013 at 9:43pm — 1 Comment

This is Strange, Need to Share

 I need to share this. It's a little strange.. but I'm hoping you folks will understand.   I had a flash back today from my childhood.
            Between the ages of 3 and 5,  I had an imaginary friend. But he was real, I could see him clearly.  His name was Tiger.  We began spending time together when my family lived with my grandparents, in their 200 year old home. He was the best friend a girl could have.…
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Added by Patience on August 6, 2013 at 7:20pm — 8 Comments

Broken sleep

Thoughts about sleep

March 26, 2009 at 12:32am

I have lots of those these days. I think about sleep constantly. This is not new.…

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Added by Sharon on August 5, 2013 at 7:21pm — 1 Comment

Year One

I think I know why the first year, why firsts period, are so important to us widows and widowers. During the first year after your loss, you look at milestone dates, holidays, birthdays, vacations, etc., basically any date from the year before, and you think/say "last year at this time we were _____."  It provides cold comfort (which is better than none) and as a touchstone. And it makes you feel, irrationally of course, not so far away from your loved one. Of course you are not close to…

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Added by robinslove on August 5, 2013 at 5:47pm — 4 Comments

Is Crying a "disease"?

I feel like I have been doing pretty damn well on this sh*&&^ journey I am on.   For most days in the past 4 months since losing Barb I have exercised, cooked for myself, seen friends, kept the house up and even worked some.   I am taking on some tasks (like cleaning out closets) that I could not even think of two months ago without wanting to hurl.    I have had a few days where I have curled up and done nothing but really, very few.   So, why is that when I cry, which…

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Added by BarbsWife (Tamera) on August 5, 2013 at 5:45pm — 5 Comments

Let's Make A Deal

A couple of Friday nights ago, a friend of mine was the opening band at a local club.  Following his set, I joined him, his wife and son at a restaurant for something to eat. My friend was having a difficult time reading the menu, what with being a vain rock-and-roller and all, so I slipped him my reading glasses knowing I had a spare pair in my bag. As I felt around, I came up with a pair...but it was missing an arm.  So I fished some more and came up with a pair of sunglasses.  Then…

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Added by barbstar54 on August 5, 2013 at 2:30am — 1 Comment

Damn sneak attacks!

I had a huge crying spell just now. Yelling at God and everything. I felt like a huge weight was pressing down on my chest and almost crushing me like I couldn't breathe. It started with me thinking about him and missing him so badly. My heart hurts so much and I feel sick to my stomach. I swear I was just a normal person an hour ago. I hate these sneak attacks! Damn them! It's been over 5 months and tonight felt like day one. Unbelievable how a person can change in an instant. Of course the… Continue

Added by TamilovesTim on August 4, 2013 at 9:24pm — 4 Comments

Damn sneak attacks!

I had a huge crying spell just now. Yelling at God and everything. I felt like a huge weight was pressing down on my chest and almost crushing me like I couldn't breathe. It started with me thinking about him and missing him so badly. My heart hurts so much and I feel sick to my stomach. I swear I was just a normal person an hour ago. I hate these sneak attacks! Damn them! It's been over 5 months and tonight felt like day one. Unbelievable how a person can change in an instant. Of course the… Continue

Added by TamilovesTim on August 4, 2013 at 9:24pm — No Comments

This felt right

Who remembers the Claytons ads?  You know, the drink you have when you're not having a drink?  Well I've made a Claytons decision about my husbands ashes...the decision you make when you can't make a decision lol.  After much toing and froing I finally decided to take Doug's ashes home to his parents for them to decide what to do with them.  We were together for just short of 6 years.  We experienced a lot in this years, good and bad.  In the end he chose to take his own life for many…

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Added by chez2all on August 4, 2013 at 4:30pm — 4 Comments

Never the same

My life has and will never be the same as of Jan 25,2013. My husband and I were diagnosed with an autoimmune disease six months apart. The medications seemed to only help my husband for a short time. He began to have horrible pain that nothing helped. He was in the hospital about 10 times the last year for being sick. They told him he had a food allergy. The list continued with things the doctors thought were wrong. He told me one day that with every new doctor he became worse and now is the… Continue

Added by Turtle on August 4, 2013 at 4:29pm — 4 Comments

My New Me – My New Life (and sometimes lack thereof).

My life has changed in so many ways. Of course the biggest way - Cindy is no longer here with me. And that changes ever other aspect of my life including my daily existence.

 

I’ll never be the same person. My life will never be the same.

 

I feel like I’m starting to figure out or realize at least some of the aspects of this “new me.”

 

I do realize how many friends are gone. I do realize which friendships are the ones that involve my making the…

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Added by Mac on August 4, 2013 at 3:26pm — 6 Comments

9 months-

Nine months.  A period of time that we usually associate with a blessed event.  Nine long angonizing months.  Nine months since I heard his voice.  Nine months since I felt his arms around me.  Nine months since I could reach out and just hold onto him, put my hand on his chest at night, feel his heartbeat, wonder at how strong it felt.  Nine months ago I was a different person.

Funny how death changes us.  I'm learning now to do things I should have learned to do when I was a kid, in…

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Added by GracieM2012 on August 3, 2013 at 9:32pm — 1 Comment

Tru' Dat

 

 

“If your actions do not prove the truth of your words,

 then your words are nothing more than lies’’

-Unknown

 

This is something I came across some time ago on my way to looking up…

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Added by hendrixx2 on August 2, 2013 at 5:57pm — 6 Comments

Home Repairs

Learning to do home repairs for me has not been an easy task but one I am tackling.  I had to go to Home Depot this morning to get some drywall tape because I realized that I had 4 outside corners where the metal really should be covered and the drywall compound was just not doing the job.  I only when to get the drywall tape…

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Added by Morgana (Janet) on August 2, 2013 at 1:30pm — 9 Comments

Fulfilling a Promise

The last year of my husband, Walter's life was filled with stress and struggle.  He was losing the battle and we both knew it.  One day out of the blue, he said to me, "babe, when I'm gone will you bring flowers to my grave every once in a while?"  I said, "of course, I will."  Then I would hope that he wouldn't say anything else about it because my stomach was in a constant knot as it was.  He didn't say anything about that, but periodically, out of the blue, he would ask me or tell me…

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Added by freddieb on August 1, 2013 at 9:09pm — 2 Comments

When People Bash Their Spouses

An incident happened today when two women were talking negative things on their husbands.

How do you react to this?  It just makes me think, if they could ever walk in our shoes, how would they really react?  Would they feel guilty for all the times they said negative things about their husbands.  When I said I was a widow and they said, you are so lucky – wish I was a widow!  I couldn’t believe my ears.  Just walked away thinking that I would give anything to have my husband here…

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Added by judy on August 1, 2013 at 8:44am — 5 Comments

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