This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

September 2018 Blog Posts (17)

First Time Out

I'm brand new here and making my first post.  I lost my husband of 47 years two and a half months ago.  He became ill and two weeks later spent a week in the hospital, was diagnosed with a perforated colon, renal failure and dementia and was given the shocking news that he had 10 days to live.  I told the doctors not to let him know.  I arranged hospice care to come a couple of times a week, took him home and took care of him.  He was bedridden and unable to do…


Added by Pegasus on September 29, 2018 at 10:29am — 2 Comments

Six years

What has changed, what is still the same after six years? I still live in the same house with very few changes. I have changed the white goods as age took it's toll on them so new refrigerator, new freezer, soon to be new washing machine. I drive the same car, but that too needs changing. I think the biggest changes have been forced on me by my own health problems and probably the ageing process. I know now I could never keep up with all the things I could fit into a day six years ago. And…


Added by only1sue on September 25, 2018 at 4:13pm — 1 Comment

Happy Anniversary..

Today would have been our 11th Anniversary.  I've been dreading this day all month.  My emotions have been all over the place.  The incredible sadness followed by the bittersweet joy of memories.  The guilt.of...what ~  I'm not sure.  The Love that still lingers... If I had know our times would be our last..I would have hugged them a little tighter..Loved them so much longer.  This is my 3rd Anniversary without him.  I like to think I'm making incredible progress being on my own.  But my…


Added by Rkay on September 25, 2018 at 8:41am — 3 Comments

Living life to honour the lost....without them

I have 4 more years of school to go with the kids and then I am free to roam as Sean and I had planned to do. Only of course now, my plans, our plans, are all shot to pieces. Sean died and we never got to roam as we had planned. Do I go anyway, by myself? What will that look like? feel like? He was always saying "make memories"; "Live life" "travel the country" "see the world". We just never seemed to have the money to travel the world, but we did see a fair bit of…


Added by Miss Em (Emma) on September 20, 2018 at 4:24pm — 5 Comments


Sex - its a funny business; not just the mechanics of it. On one hand, it is the most intimate of all physical relationships possible. It is considered sacred in a committed relationship, and sex outside of marriage is often the catalyst for divorce. On the other, one night stands, booty calls, casual hook ups are considered normal among singles. I guess the two kind of balance each other out. Sex is a physical need and an emotional glue, (and of course a means to procreate). As…


Added by Miss Em (Emma) on September 17, 2018 at 4:48pm — 5 Comments

Do I REALLY want to find love again?

Hello all.  

This is Steve again.  In case you haven’t read my prior posts, I was partnered close to 31 years to a man I loved very much, mike, my best friend, partner in life.  He passed in March of 09 from stage 4 cancer at 50 yrs old.  I was 46 when he passed.  

I am now 56 years old.  I, as maybe many of you, have experienced a lot of loss.  In the past 10 years, besides my partner, have had about 10 of our inner circle pass away as well.  It’s really been a bizarre decade.…


Added by Steve on September 17, 2018 at 1:58am — 6 Comments

Taking a new focus

There is always something new to worry about.  The news from the neurosurgeon was not good. The aneurysm is not operable so I live with it. I know that if I have a sharp pain in my  head I have to ring an emergency ambulance. If  I am driving I pull off the road and if I have time ring the ambulance. Sounds so simple doesn't it? Well that is one problem I hope not to face. In the meantime I am not to worry (easier said than done) and go on with my life. The good news from the appointment…


Added by only1sue on September 16, 2018 at 3:34am — 1 Comment

That feeling you forgot something!

I am sure we have all had that feeling, you gather your things to leave for the day and you get this feeling you forgot something.   Sometimes you get to your destination only to find you really did forget something.  You forgot you lunch at home, your cell phone on your couch, or ID on your night stand.  And sometimes you never figure out what it was you thought you forgot.  I got up this morning, got dressed and had breakfast.  I made lunch and packed it into my bag.  Threw on my shoes and…


Added by MidnightBear (Tony) on September 11, 2018 at 12:08pm — 5 Comments


Today is my first wedding anniversary. Not just since my Marcus died in January... My first one EVER. He was killed one week shy of our four month wedding anniversary. I'm sad. Duh. But I can feel this molten lava-like anger building inside of me as the day continues. Anger isn't right... Fury is more like it. I want to scream. I want to go to the grain elevator and do damage. I want to kick someone. I'm just livid. I'm so broken today. Despite the efforts of my wonderful family to brighten…


Added by shellybean on September 8, 2018 at 12:37pm — 11 Comments

I fell for a scammer ....

How was that even possible? I know better. I've been processing…


Added by Dianne in Nevada on September 5, 2018 at 7:00pm — 11 Comments

My Bed

I have what is described in Australia, as a king sized bed. I am not sure what that is in other countries, but it is the largest standard sized bed available here. My husband was tall so he preferred a large bed where he could spread out. We were never cuddle sleepers, preferring to have a cuddle, then retreat to our respective sides for sleep. This has resulted in two definite dips in the plush mattress topper. Since Sean died, I have been acutely aware of the size of the bed and that I am…


Added by Miss Em (Emma) on September 5, 2018 at 3:19pm — 4 Comments


After reading other tragic stories, and trying to make sense of my own story; I found a common thread. We all associate the day, time, what we we're doing, weather and so on with the day our live changed. 

For me, I have realized I don’t remember what day it was. Or, if it was sunny, raining, or cloudy. all I remember are the numbers.  All the numbing numbers. 115, 213, 217, 48, 70, 08, 09, 3, 8 10 31and 6 11 18.  Just a bunch of random meaningless numbers; unless you are the owner of…


Added by Lifeunknown17 on September 5, 2018 at 11:01am — 2 Comments

A sunflower in heaven

English is not my first language. Sorry for the mistakes.

Today´s been 32 days since I´ve lost my sunflower. We still don´t know what was the cause of death since I´m dealing with a lot of red tape due to the fact he was not from here and came to this land only to marry me. I still remind the day I first saw him going out of the boarding gate, looking for me, full of hopes and dreams. I had never been happier in my life. Suddenly I had found the ONE I had been looking…


Added by on September 3, 2018 at 4:53pm — 5 Comments

9.5 years into my journey after Mike.

Hello everyone,

I’m Steve, and I’ve been a long time member here, since about 18 months after my long time male life partner passed in March of 09.  Ours was an amazing love story, fraught with big challenges, Mike was bi-polar, drug and alcohol abuser at times, we met and fell in love in our teens, we had zero support from our families, 

so, we chose to move out on our own and create a life for ourselves.  In our early twenties, we decided enough of drugs, parties, it was time…


Added by Steve on September 2, 2018 at 9:01pm — 4 Comments

Thirteen is just a stage!

I have two thirteen year old boys! Yep two of them, twins. Their dad was killed a week after their thirteenth birthday. I am not sure when the right time to loose a dad is, but I am thinking a week after turning 13 isn't great timing! I also have a 17 year old son who is mostly human and is thoughtful and does even contribute in a positive way. Back to the 13yo's, I am so glad it is a stage. I do remember that 14 comes after 13 and 14 can be just as bad, if not worse, but again I keep…


Added by Miss Em (Emma) on September 2, 2018 at 3:54pm — 7 Comments


Today is Sunday #22. 

My weeks have become that.  What Sunday is it now?  The rest of the week can come and go, but Sundays,  well, they are "special" to be forever ingrained in my life, my brain, how I eat and sleep.  Randy died on a Sunday. I count them and can't believe it has only been 22 Sundays.  It feels like a liftetime ago that I saw him, kissed him, shoot, got mad at him!  I feel like I can't remember what he looks like. I feel like it has been YEARS that I saw him and at…


Added by MomOfBoys (Tammi) on September 2, 2018 at 10:36am — 5 Comments

Sometimes my life goes blank

I am busy most of the time, it is a deliberate strategy on my part. I was in the shops today and suddenly I urgently wanted to go home. I recall my Ray doing that as part of his dementia so I hope it is not like that. It is like a sudden onset of overwhelming tiredness. A sudden  thought that I have finished wanting to be where l am. Sometimes I give in to the feeling and head home and sometimes I try to to stay a while longer, tough it out. Going home is only a ten minute drive from where I…


Added by only1sue on September 1, 2018 at 10:14am — 1 Comment

Monthly Archives














© 2020   Created by Soaring Spirits.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service