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October 2016 Blog Posts (13)

we all have our problems

We all have problems fitting into society.  I am lactose intolerant so no dairy of any kind and I am allergic to palm oil which means I can't eat anything with oils in unless I have read the label.  Last week I was invited to the neighbor's house on the right side of my house to help celebrate his Dad's birthday. There was a  lovely roast dinner with steamed vegetables and the sauce it was served with was separate so I could eat it all.  I dipped out on the dessert as I thought probably not…

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Added by only1sue on October 30, 2016 at 2:33am — 2 Comments

Sacred Objects

This is Valentine the dog. He is special to me because he was an important part of starting my relationship with Alan.

In late 2005, Alan saw me at school as we were both picking up our kids after work and asked me out. I said I was interested but it was too early, since I was still working through a…

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Added by lowrsr (Sherry) on October 29, 2016 at 5:04pm — 1 Comment

Beginning my Unwelcome Journey

A little over a month ago, on September 16, my life changed forever. My husband and I were on a camping trip in the Smokey Mountains. He suffered a heart attack and died on a Friday evening, as we were getting ready to sleep in our pop-up trailer.

I have been in shock ever since. We had only been…

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Added by lowrsr (Sherry) on October 26, 2016 at 6:30pm — 3 Comments

Happy again.

I know that jumping the gun and diving into a relationship is never a good idea. I also know that when I met my wife it was pretty much out of the blue as we were introduced one night at a carnival by a mutual friend. I say that because even though we didn't know anything about each other we definitely jumped into our relationship. That being said I don't think it's necessarily always a bad idea to jump into a relationship with someone. I believe you need to follow your heart where it leads…

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Added by Lallen on October 24, 2016 at 7:15pm — No Comments

Cleaning Progresses

The auction company came and removed everything. It cost way more than it should have for them to pick it up, but it's out of the house, at least. They told me not to expect an overly large check. Honestly, I wasn't expecting a large check. I'm mostly just glad to get anything for it and to get it out of the house. The money is a very welcome bonus, but not the main motivation. There's a few larger things that I need to find homes for, and there was another large round for Goodwill, but it's…

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Added by Medea on October 24, 2016 at 4:56am — No Comments

Scam artists

March 2, 2007 I lost my husband and so it has almost been 10 years since his passing.



I am now an empty nester living on my own and it sucks! No one to talk to no one to love no one to encourage. I am miserable! I am working tons and I am so exhausted I came to realize I was happier back when and made up mind to find someone new. I joined a new internet sight called meet me.com. Where I met multiple men all interested in me. Well long story short I met a man I thought was real and… Continue

Added by Therese on October 22, 2016 at 2:51pm — 11 Comments

Will You Remember Us?

When I think about my husband and all the things I loved about him, I try to keep his legend alive for my kids. Difficult to believe, it will soon be 5 years, and our memories of him are sadly beginning to fade. For my youngest, going from 9 to 14 and my oldest from 15 to building her own life at 20, a lot of time has passed. It is getting harder to remember what it felt like to not be empty. It is getting harder to remember all of the intricacies of his…

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Added by icecream on October 19, 2016 at 4:37am — 1 Comment

10 Things Not to Say to Widow on RD

I'm in Readers Digest with this article: http://www.rd.com/advice/relationships/never-say-to-widow/. Maybe it'll help with awareness and tactlessness. I write from my own experiences. I'm on vacation without my husband and it's hard to do stuff you always thought you'd do together. When I see older couples in my tour group help eachother over cobbled streets I get a pang.

Added by The Hungover Widow on October 17, 2016 at 9:00pm — No Comments

I still fear life...

It's been a while since I have written on here, but I need a safe space and this is my only safe haven.

I'm lost. 

Still.

I'm hurting. 

Still.

I scream and cry.

Still.

I can't find my footing or a place here in this new reality.

Still.

Toby's been gone for over 3 years and I'm still struggling.

I went thru his things.

I rented out our home.

I moved 3000 miles.

I have a new someone my…

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Added by IndiaKai on October 16, 2016 at 7:00pm — 4 Comments

Dating Has Become Complicated-Because of Me

I'll give a little background. I was with my wife for 36 years, married for 31. She passed two years ago from cancer. It was a quick death, although we thought there would be more time. But when C comes back, it's with a vengeance. After hearing horror stories about years-long cancer battles, I consider my wife lucky. She did not suffer. I have come to terms about this. 

Since then, my life settled down, I've found a routine- working, keeping my home tidy, which is still a lot of work…

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Added by FootballGeek on October 14, 2016 at 12:34pm — 5 Comments

soon

All through my journey of 13 years with my husband with strokes and my last four years of my journey as a widow I keep hearing the word "soon". Soon is when everything is going to happen.  I will feel better soon...come to terms with it soon...get used to it soon...accept it soon.  This is all from people who of course have not been through any of these experiences that I have had, have not had a husband who has gone from a healthy, strong man to a man who can hardly walk, has some problems…

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Added by only1sue on October 7, 2016 at 4:30am — 3 Comments

PTSD's a bitch

It is October again. As it would be. The last time I published something was last October and that is no coincidence. Ron was diagnosed this week in 2011. He went to the clinic in Jakarta on Monday and Tuesday. Got sent to Singapore on Wednesday and on Thursday was told he had terminal pancreatic cancer.  I am pulled back to writing, to putting these feelings on paper.



I am in a different place this year. Not rocked to my knees, feeling spun out of control by the…

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Added by MissingRKK on October 4, 2016 at 4:57pm — 5 Comments

Halloween Begins...

The Wellbutrin has evened out and I can't even begin to explain the difference. It doesn't feel like I'm suffocating. It doesn't feel like getting out of bed is too much work, and why bother. The grief is still there, it's just... easier to carry? A little less immediate? It's not overwhelming everything. The anxiety is also still there, though I can mostly deal with it.

Tuesday the guy from the auction place is coming over and bringing the contract with him. So that will be that. I…

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Added by Medea on October 2, 2016 at 6:37am — No Comments

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