We all have problems fitting into society. I am lactose intolerant so no dairy of any kind and I am allergic to palm oil which means I can't eat anything with oils in unless I have read the label. Last week I was invited to the neighbor's house on the right side of my house to help celebrate his Dad's birthday. There was a lovely roast dinner with steamed vegetables and the sauce it was served with was separate so I could eat it all. I dipped out on the dessert as I thought probably not…Continue
This is Valentine the dog. He is special to me because he was an important part of starting my relationship with Alan.
In late 2005, Alan saw me at school as we were both picking up our kids after work and asked me out. I said I was interested but it was too early, since I was still working through a…Continue
A little over a month ago, on September 16, my life changed forever. My husband and I were on a camping trip in the Smokey Mountains. He suffered a heart attack and died on a Friday evening, as we were getting ready to sleep in our pop-up trailer.
I have been in shock ever since. We had only been…Continue
I know that jumping the gun and diving into a relationship is never a good idea. I also know that when I met my wife it was pretty much out of the blue as we were introduced one night at a carnival by a mutual friend. I say that because even though we didn't know anything about each other we definitely jumped into our relationship. That being said I don't think it's necessarily always a bad idea to jump into a relationship with someone. I believe you need to follow your heart where it leads…Continue
Added by Lallen on October 24, 2016 at 7:15pm — No Comments
The auction company came and removed everything. It cost way more than it should have for them to pick it up, but it's out of the house, at least. They told me not to expect an overly large check. Honestly, I wasn't expecting a large check. I'm mostly just glad to get anything for it and to get it out of the house. The money is a very welcome bonus, but not the main motivation. There's a few larger things that I need to find homes for, and there was another large round for Goodwill, but it's…Continue
Added by Medea on October 24, 2016 at 4:56am — No Comments
When I think about my husband and all the things I loved about him, I try to keep his legend alive for my kids. Difficult to believe, it will soon be 5 years, and our memories of him are sadly beginning to fade. For my youngest, going from 9 to 14 and my oldest from 15 to building her own life at 20, a lot of time has passed. It is getting harder to remember what it felt like to not be empty. It is getting harder to remember all of the intricacies of his…Continue
Added by The Hungover Widow on October 17, 2016 at 9:00pm — No Comments
It's been a while since I have written on here, but I need a safe space and this is my only safe haven.
I scream and cry.
I can't find my footing or a place here in this new reality.
Toby's been gone for over 3 years and I'm still struggling.
I went thru his things.
I rented out our home.
I moved 3000 miles.
I have a new someone my…Continue
I'll give a little background. I was with my wife for 36 years, married for 31. She passed two years ago from cancer. It was a quick death, although we thought there would be more time. But when C comes back, it's with a vengeance. After hearing horror stories about years-long cancer battles, I consider my wife lucky. She did not suffer. I have come to terms about this.
Since then, my life settled down, I've found a routine- working, keeping my home tidy, which is still a lot of work…Continue
All through my journey of 13 years with my husband with strokes and my last four years of my journey as a widow I keep hearing the word "soon". Soon is when everything is going to happen. I will feel better soon...come to terms with it soon...get used to it soon...accept it soon. This is all from people who of course have not been through any of these experiences that I have had, have not had a husband who has gone from a healthy, strong man to a man who can hardly walk, has some problems…Continue
It is October again. As it would be. The last time I published something was last October and that is no coincidence. Ron was diagnosed this week in 2011. He went to the clinic in Jakarta on Monday and Tuesday. Got sent to Singapore on Wednesday and on Thursday was told he had terminal pancreatic cancer. I am pulled back to writing, to putting these feelings on paper.
I am in a different place this year. Not rocked to my knees, feeling spun out of control by the…
The Wellbutrin has evened out and I can't even begin to explain the difference. It doesn't feel like I'm suffocating. It doesn't feel like getting out of bed is too much work, and why bother. The grief is still there, it's just... easier to carry? A little less immediate? It's not overwhelming everything. The anxiety is also still there, though I can mostly deal with it.
Tuesday the guy from the auction place is coming over and bringing the contract with him. So that will be that. I…Continue
Added by Medea on October 2, 2016 at 6:37am — No Comments