this showed up on a favorite regional blog, and I wanted to share it with you. It may help give some sense of scale to our suffering and to our hope for the future.
To all my firends on WV, I wish a day full of thankfulness for our lives and our families, no matter their current state. They are gifts, though often not without tarnish. It's up to us to get out the polish and apply some elbow grease, when we feel able. Blessings to you!
Yesterday was my 47th birthday, the first one without my husband. I cried with every present, card and birthday wish I recieved. No matter who it was coming from the one thing that kept running through my mind was "It's not KC" I did see I still had the text he sent me last year for my birthday, I must of looked at it a thousand times yesterday alone. I still have not opened the gift KC had put away for me for my birthday, I know this is the last one I will ever recieve from him and I'm…Continue
I decided to start writing mostly to remember the beautiful love affair I shared with my husband and chronicle some memories for our son. Thanksgiving is always hard for so many reasons. We always had Thanksgiving at our house as it was the only "neutral" holiday. Everybody we could we invited. I always worked the night before and cooked when I got home. There was always so much food. Thanksgiving was the first holiday george and i spent together. at that time he lived in the house…Continue
It's 13 mths and I'm starting to feel a little better. For those of you that are new to this journey, you may be saying never will I feel better again. It does happen, but the timing is different for each person. I have been widowed 2x and I have said that many times before. This death has hit me the hardest. Who would have thought that I would have to say goodbye to 2 great men in my life. Yesterday I decided it was time to take care of me and help me feel better. For years I was a…Continue
Enjoy an excerpt from the first draft of my memoir on the first Thanksgiving we had as a married couple.
Added by CrazyWidow on November 23, 2011 at 7:23am — No Comments
tomorrow is the official date of Mike's death. 4:43pm. today is the tuesday, the two days before thanksgiving..last year it was this day he left us.
I am doing better then I thought I would be.. crying jags here and there but I will be ok. The proof is that I. am. still. here. One breath, one step, one day at a time.
I have many blessings, one of which was spending almost 30 years with Mike.. married just a week or so shy of our 28th anniversary. 12/4
Since my beloved Joe has gone home I have been trying to be a better person, but I have recently found that although I am trying to be a better person people seem to be using me a lot more.
People had labeled me as a bitch which in some way's I didn't mind.I was a strong independent woman I didn't take no crap from anybody. After Joe passed away I started showing people that I am a good person and I started to show people the real me the me that Joe loved. But with me…Continue
“It's difficult not having your beloved here with you. Always remember that he/she is with you wherever you go; in spirit, in memories and in love. Your beloved’s legacy lives on in and through you." ~GreggiesWidow
(The famous "first picture" and our sand candles from
a friends Thanksgiving Party 11/21/09)
Added by Greggies Widow on November 21, 2011 at 9:26pm — No Comments
Nov. 21, 2011
Good morning on this crisp golden-leaves-turning California Monday. In reading others blogs I am moved by your expressions of your own personal experiences of deepest loss.
My first blog and first writing.... So many new beginnings now...How does one really define all the pivotal…Continue
Thanksgiving is on its way, with other holidays right on its heels, and it seems that during this time our losses are amplified. In light of that, I'd like to offer up some resources that may be helpful to you at this time.
First, Griefsgiving. After seeing post after post on Facebook from people sharing what they are thankful for (including their spouses, etc.) at this time of…Continue
Here's a link to my weekend blog post:
Last year was our first Christmas without Craig. I cannot remember how my feelings exactly were...we went through Christmas and it wasn't too bad. Although one of my sons didn't see Christmas as it was sick in bed for the day. We didn't do a tree or decorations and had Christmas down the BIL's. This year christmas is again down the BIL's but I will put up a tree and decorations.
Although this year I am feeling very flat. My memories seem to be flooding back more and more and…Continue
The past couple of days although it is early I have been seeing Christmas decorations going up. Houses in my neighborhood have there lights up,The holiday commercials are playing on t.v and the stores have there sales and decorations up.
Last year at this time I have been singing Christmas carols for the past couple of months. Asking you for the past couple of weeks what you want for Christmas, and anticipating Thanksgiving because the day after black Friday, We would get up…Continue
Widow...what a word, I have been letting it settle around me, seeing how fit what it like to walk in to say it out loud. Immersed in writing and reading lots of reading in an online community of people sharing their experience, strength and hope with each other. So deeply appreciative of the experience of being able to learn from kindred spirits.
As I devour and absorb the journey's of others who that lost their spouses and been generous with individual widow experiences, I try and…
So we have now passed the 4 month mark and are approaching the upcoming holiday season. This is something that fills me with some dread. The dread is in regards to how to fill the house with laughter on Christmas morning or how to give gifts that mean something when material things have very little value.
Life with Joe was always so full and he was a his best at Christmas. Last Christmas he reenacted the scene from the Office where Michael gives out the ipod during the…Continue
Today, I finished my book! My fingers have been dancing across the keyboard for three days straight. How did I finally get the "source" and knowledge to spew onto the monitor and into the computer?
It wasn't easy. Two weeks ago, I had 18 chapters. I was planning on dedicating a couple hours each day. I got distracted, it was easy to find something else to focus on. I still felt incomplete.
Tosha Silver, a columnist/Astrologer for the examiner.com invited me and my…
Something tragic happened this week. My neighbor lost her youngest son in a traffic accident. He was 29. The details are sketchy right now, but they don't matter to her because knowing what really happened will not bring him back. We became neighbors in 1998 when her family and my family moved into our newly built homes together right across the street from each other. We both had sons named Richard. She was going through a divorce and trying to raise 2 teenage boys and I had been…Continue
A friend shared this with me not sure where she found it but I love it
Grief is a storm. Only you can’t come in. Did I say storm, I meant hurricane. And everybody who loves you is standing by’ You can see them and sometimes you can hear them. But you can’t feel them. All you can feel is the grief. It consumes you. And everybody has a brolly for you. They’re are all waiting, wanting to shelter you. But you can’t come in. In there doesn’t exist for you any more. There is only…Continue
I wrote this last Thanksgiving and I hope it helps you survive the holidays!
Secure Blog Link: http://crazywidow.info/?p=2814
Added by CrazyWidow on November 18, 2011 at 6:25am — No Comments
There is this vortex of grief that you don’t know you’re in until you somehow manage to break through and sneak a peak of the outside shell. Anything can set it off really. I knew that choosing to sleep in one of his old Jerseys the past 2 nights might stir something up. But I needed comfort. I sought it out. Comfort didn’t find me. Instead I was drawn to pictures of him. His lovely oceany eyes. His strong legs. The warmth in the creases in his face when he smiled. Shattered. The…Continue
Added by CrazyWidow on November 18, 2011 at 6:24am — No Comments