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This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

All Blog Posts (4,255)

Oatmeal Please.



I’m stuck.  I am getting “opportunities” left and right that include free perks, meeting cool people.  On paper, it’s awesome.  In my heart, my mind, my soul, I’m going nowhere soon.

I read my friend Paul’s blog today and lightbulbs went off all over my brain.  But then it went back to the picture above.  Mush.  Cream of Wheat to be specific.  Healthy for you, but not the tastiest thing on earth.  Not that any of the emotions in that…

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Added by CrazyWidow on March 31, 2011 at 5:26am — No Comments

Making a Purse from a Sow's Ear...



Cancer survivor uses expired meds for…

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Added by Alive & Mortal on March 30, 2011 at 4:30am — No Comments


VOLUNTEER
Junk mail for the dead, or, YOU CANNOT BE TURNED DOWN!



Sometimes a piece of junk mail can really make your day. Widowed people are pretty used to receiving mail, email, and phone calls for their late spouses. At first, these situations can hurt, and be another occasion to "break the news" yet… Continue

Added by Soaring Spirits on March 29, 2011 at 5:00pm — No Comments

Communicating with Children through Sand Play

Direct conversation? It has it's limitations.

 

Studies show that blood flow moves away from the cognitive language centers of the brain when there is trauma or grief. Children, generally, already have less developed verbal abilities. They also have age-appropriate limitations with certain types of understanding and abstract thinking.Trauma and stress can effect children differently, and they will try and act or play it…

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Added by Alive & Mortal on March 28, 2011 at 2:30pm — 1 Comment

Take a Survey About Your Personal Experience with Grief

Would you like to contribute to the knowledge base of what grief is really like by participating in a research survey? The online publication SLATE is asking those who have suffered the loss of a loved one to take an anonymous survey on the topic of What Is Grief Really Like?

 

If you are interested in participating, check out the link here:   http://www.slate.com/id/2289332?wpisrc=sl_ipad

Added by Jill on March 27, 2011 at 5:54pm — No Comments

The New Road

 

some where on the I-5 in CA heading south



862 miles


14 hours in the car


in two days
.

Less actually, because we left at 
1:00 pm on Friday
 and got back tonight (Saturday) at 7:00 pm.





It started with a casual…

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Added by BlackWidow3 on March 26, 2011 at 11:30pm — 3 Comments

Wedding Anniversary

Today would've been our 29th wedding anniversary.....WOW! I know we would've made it too. Our commitment to each other was true to the core! The song I've posted has a crazy video but I'm so sure that the tune would've been one that Bill and I would get a kick out of.



Don't take each other for granted. Love each other forever from the bottom of your hearts! Live a life of no regrets........OK Please?…





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Added by wannabmartha on March 26, 2011 at 8:30pm — 1 Comment

The Dating Game

Well, I'm ready to start dating again....or for the first time, I guess.  Yikes.  I've been thinking a lot about how to go about this, whether to blog about it, how much to share online, etc....and I don't know that I'll make the right decisions every step of the way.  In fact, I probably won't.  I've never gone through this before, so it's silly to think I'll do everything right the first time I try.



For those who don't know, I started dating my husband when we were teenagers -- I… Continue

Added by Wendy on March 25, 2011 at 5:57am — No Comments


VOLUNTEER
What Short Stack gets, part 3: Cancer



[Read What Short Stack gets, part 1 and part 2.] 



Bad news,… Continue

Added by Soaring Spirits on March 24, 2011 at 11:22am — 1 Comment

2 1/2 months, 73 days, 10 wks.  no matter which way we look at it, it is a lot of time to be missing someone you love.  Everything is fine, bills paid, house and car clean and in order, grandkids bee…

2 1/2 months, 73 days, 10 wks.  no matter which way we look at it, it is a lot of time to be missing someone you love.  Everything is fine, bills paid, house and car clean and in order, grandkids been over, our dogs are groomed and full ------but --------something major is not right.  Death aint so bad, it's missing them that hurts.  I guess with joy comes sorrow.  I guess if you cared a lot, you're gonna grieve a lot.  Sure wish he was here with me to get thru this awful thing called… Continue

Added by barb on March 23, 2011 at 1:14pm — 5 Comments

Six months ....

http://amyelomawidowsjourney.blogspot.com/

Added by Dianne in Nevada on March 23, 2011 at 8:43am — No Comments

After the Fairytale, A New Story.

 

Once upon a time I was part of a certain type of family: we were a happily married couple with our two kids, a house and a dog. We lived in a neighborhood with other families like ours. We had a lucky partnership with a full future ahead of us. Together we would love and influence our children, return to our twosome when they left home, and then…

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Added by Jill on March 22, 2011 at 7:30am — No Comments


VOLUNTEER
What Grieving People Want You to Know, By Dr. Virginia Simpson

Introduction by Supa Dupa Fresh

Most of us have seen this pithy, heartful piece around... or its many, many imitators, with titles like "Letter from a Young Widow," "Letter by a Widow," and so on. Rest assured, this one is the original, and credit must go to Dr. Virginia Simpson.

I spoke to Dr. Simpson in early 2010 about this piece and her recent work in hospice. She confimed what that I already believed about…

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Added by Soaring Spirits on March 21, 2011 at 10:06am — 3 Comments

Time ...

 

http://amyelomawidowsjourney.blogspot.com/2011/03/time.html

Added by Dianne in Nevada on March 20, 2011 at 12:40pm — No Comments

It Only Takes ....

.... a moment.

One teeny tiny moment .... to change your world.

To destroy your world as you know it.

To make you feel as if you will drop dead.



Just one moment.



I have been trying and trying to upload a picture for the top of this entry, but I'm in a hotel and the computer won't let me upload pics.  So I will do my best to leave the web site so that you can click on it and then see it.…

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Added by Janine (txmomx6) on March 16, 2011 at 8:11pm — 8 Comments

Tax Information for Widows

Editor’s Note: Many Widows and Widowers find tax time confusing, especially the first year or two after your spouse has died. I’ve asked Kelly Phillips Erb, tax attorney and tax blogger, for some tax advice which she has generously shared here. Kelly first wrote this article in 2009, so there may be some dated information, but I wanted to…

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Added by Sherry on March 16, 2011 at 5:34pm — No Comments

Widower Wednesday: What I Would and Can Give Up

When Kevin died, I said over and over that I would have given up anything to have him still be here on earth.  I no longer feel that immediacy.  While I wish he hadn't passed, I'm content in my new life and where my chapter two is headed.  The immediacy, to have him here in order to survive, is gone.  I am happy to embrace my presence now and see him in the other life.

As tragedy unfolds around me from countries being swallowed by earth and water, to new widows entering this world, to…

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Added by CrazyWidow on March 16, 2011 at 7:00am — 2 Comments

Sometimes Fooling Yourself is A Good Thing, Especially When You're Grieving

When you're in the throes of grief, you need a few personal tricks to keep on moving through the pain, especially in the early months and years after sustaining a major loss. We all have tricks we play, we just may not be aware of what they are. Joan Didion called it Magical Thinking. I think a little mental magic might be essential to the new widow or widower's survival.

 

I was partial to frequent lunch and coffee dates with sympathetic friends because they made me feel that…

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Added by Jill on March 15, 2011 at 6:46pm — 3 Comments

EMDR

My brain is on overload this morning.  Friday I began therapy.  Part of my therapy is the general kind, the other is something called EMDR.  Most people think I'm nuts when I talk about what EMDR involves.  I have decided I am not going to think too much about how it works, and just focus on believing that it's going to work for me.

 

Maybe you don't associate losing your husband as involving trauma…

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Added by CrazyWidow on March 14, 2011 at 7:49am — 3 Comments

Ode to Widville

 

 

Welcome to our village of widowhood

Pull up a chair it’s all good…

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Added by patter on March 13, 2011 at 9:36am — 1 Comment

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