This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

All Blog Posts (4,402)

You are Not your Past

I've been attending church again.  Gasp, I know!  I have probably gone to church more in the past two months than I have in the past two years.  It's a big commitment/step.  I like to draw things from the sermons, even if, in my brain, I can't quite take it to the God level.  But, I can take it to my level, where I can look at what the pastor says according to God, and see how I can apply it in my life.  This past week, the pastor focused on the past, and how it affects our future but does…


Added by CrazyWidow on March 7, 2011 at 9:00am — No Comments


These days I'm struggling with change. Most of the time it makes me sad. During what seems like a very long time ago it didn't bother me so much. In fact, I welcomed it. I like the change of seasons and I enjoy a change of scenery. I love to change clothes and get comfortable and I really like a little change in my purse! It's so exciting to change countries and see things that I've never seen before.

A change of your mind can be a good or bad…

Added by wannabmartha on March 6, 2011 at 5:47pm — 1 Comment

Healing Memories

I wrote yesterday about the influence basketball has had on our life. It was nice to recall those special memories, as I've been stuck in only being able to focus on the long, hard cancer battle.  Remembering all that happened during those very tough 4-1/2 years causes me to second-guess the decisions we made along the way - the should haves/could haves of the chemo and radiation treatments, kidney failure/dialysis, the doctors involved, the many infections, the unexpected challenges, the pain… Continue

Added by Dianne in Nevada on March 6, 2011 at 11:53am — No Comments

Feeling Widowy...

OK, I know that widowy isn’t a word, but it is a description of how I feel today. Widowy isn’t quite full on sadness. Widowy is more like melancholy.  My grief, my sadness blows around me like a gentle breeze. It’s a breeze that I notice, but it’s not the hurricane force of grief that can throw me to the ground.  Widowy for me is kind of sweet and sad all together.

Here in Arizona, the weather is cold, but beautiful these days.  In the end of January and early February the events…


Added by widowisland on March 6, 2011 at 6:25am — 1 Comment

Relit and Realistic

Delighted now

Or should I say,


After your ashes spread,

I scattered

away from the sun.

Artificial indoor light

bulbs burning all night long

through the winter

after you had gone.

Spring 2006 came on

like a dirty rat

revealing everyone's bliss,

my empty, messy lot.

I didn't want to look,

didn't have the right lens,

needed a box with a pinhole

to take in the…


Added by Jill on March 4, 2011 at 5:55am — 2 Comments

My blog - not for the faint of heart, I admit...




Added by Alive & Mortal on March 3, 2011 at 9:18pm — 2 Comments

Today I had doctors appointment in Tinley Park --I was so proud, I found the place and was on time and everything went really well.  When I get in my car to go home, I burst into tears and for the ne…

Today I had doctors appointment in Tinley Park --I was so proud, I found the place and was on time and everything went really well.  When I get in my car to go home, I burst into tears and for the next 35 miles cried like he died this morning.  I have no idea why sometimes it cuts so deep and hurts so badly.  I need to get back my relationship with God - I just need a little more time on that.  It is hard not to think about the past, the present or the future.  What does one think about…


Added by barb on March 3, 2011 at 1:00pm — No Comments


What motivates you?

What motivates you?

Yes, I wrote it twice on purpose. Well, what is it? Money? Fame? Public Acknowledgement? Those are pretty sad motivations if it fits you right now. I've never wanted any of those and don't intend to pursue them until they are achieved.

Proud. That's it for me. I want my a family and friends to be proud of the way I live my life. I want them to know I've done more for others than myself. I want God to know that I live for… Continue

Added by james7 on March 3, 2011 at 12:37pm — 1 Comment

unhappy camper

for 14 winters my husband and I took our 5th wheel away for 3 winter months.  Little did I know how he was spoiling me and how difficult it would be when he was gone.  He was sick for a long time.  In fact, he greatly outlived the time they predicted.  I was so comfortable being happy I didn't want to spend a lot of time thinking about his disease and yet I was aware of all the obvious physical affects the cancer was creating.  Now 7 weeks later, I sit and think about all the many times I…


Added by barb on March 2, 2011 at 5:07pm — 1 Comment

Writing Heals


I explore grief in writing as a way of healing. Some days, I give writing prompts you might want to try yourself. Other days, I just write. Either way, solid research shows that writing about your deepest, most important feelings can help you feel better. And hey, what's deeper than losing a spouse. Not too much!

If you enjoy my blog, I'd love to hear from you.

If you have ideas for good writing prompts to encourage others to write about their loss, please send them…


Added by Jill on February 28, 2011 at 5:05pm — No Comments

My Blog Address

Added by Dianne in Nevada on February 6, 2011 at 11:40am — No Comments

How a broken truck explained the permanency of death to a child.

This morning, on the way to school, Hannah and I were passing the spot where my truck broke down the other day.  She told me that we'll be fine today because the truck is all new, and I said yes, the truck doctor fixed it (that's what she calls my mechanic).  She agrees with me, reminding me that we went and picked it up and brought it home.  (Even though we only went and paid and got the keys, she insisted on being driven home in the minivan and I had to go back and get the…


Added by A Widowed Father on January 31, 2011 at 6:35am — 3 Comments

So Sad

Just when I thought it was safe, when I stopped waiting for more bad news, when I realized that impending doom feeling was being created by me................ I came home from work Friday night and as always looked for my cat.  Pepper is 17 years old and has been by my side since John passed away.  I don't think she has been very happy that I have been going out to work.

I found her and noticed that she seemed very lethargic.  She isn't eating and will only take a little bit of…


Added by Patricia on January 30, 2011 at 7:00pm — 10 Comments

Link to my blog - Boo's journey through widowhood

Boo's Blog

Added by Boo on January 22, 2011 at 10:03am — 1 Comment

Does the journey begin here?

I was going to share this on my current, personal blog, however, I thought I would start here. Amongst friends who may share an understanding. Please note that I use foul language and I will be talking about the spiritual - not the religious. I also want to make a note that I am completely and utterly grateful that it has been possible for me to travel this week and to do this for myself.


It has been 1 year and almost 4 months since my husband died, tragically and suddenly. A…


Added by Vertical on January 16, 2011 at 9:41pm — 2 Comments



For the next 31 days myself and a lovely group of bereaved people… Continue

Added by Alive & Mortal on January 13, 2011 at 6:30pm — No Comments

A real "widow" card for you to use (Widowers too!) -- Supa's first post

Friends, I posted this on my blog, Fresh Widow, in January of 2009. I think you might appreciate it so I'm reposting.

* * *

One night in my support group, S. said casually that he’d “left work early… I just pulled a widower card.” I thought about how often I’d done this in the months since LH died, but more about how I could make good use of some little advantage. All the handicaps I was living with… single…


Added by Soaring Spirits on January 1, 2011 at 5:30am — 1 Comment


How does Mr. Fresh feel about you calling yourself a widow? Other people ask me all the time, so one day I asked him: do you mind that I continue to do widow community activities and occasionally (when it’s appropriate) I still call myself a widow in… Continue

Added by Soaring Spirits on November 17, 2010 at 2:00pm — 5 Comments

What is a "remarried widow?"

A remarried widow shouldn’t exist. People ask her, “how can you call yourself a widow if you’re also married?” She’s milking the label. They don’t know what it was like to be married, widowed, and single all at the same time, 3 labels she never chose to wear together. She’s already cheated on a dead man.… Continue

Added by Soaring Spirits on July 5, 2010 at 2:00pm — No Comments

Just after a year: May 29, 2009

Here's another old blog of mine.  It was when I was contemplating dating again and all the trouble I was having dealing with people.


Hard to breathe.  Burning in my throat and chest.  Queasy stomach. Throbbing headache.  The depression is back.  My shattered heart strains to keep together with every beat.  There are tears screaming and burning behind my eyelids, aching to be released.  Why am I here again?  Oh, that’s right, I thought I saw a light at the end of the tunnel. …


Added by Shannon on May 27, 2009 at 10:00am — No Comments

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