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Only1sue's Blog – June 2014 Archive (4)

What to do when you need someone to help you make decisions

One of my problems seems to be that I have no-one to bounce ideas off now.  When Ray was his full self, before strokes diminished his intellectual powers, he could always see where I could do something better.  Sometimes I resented that and sometimes I knew he was right and adjusted my plans.  Now I seem to stumble on in the dark and try to get it right but often get it wrong.

I'd like to run my ideas past my adult children but they are "busy leading their own lives" as people so…

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Added by only1sue on June 18, 2014 at 6:00am — 4 Comments

wintering widow

Another day when it was dark by 5pm and I am shut in my house. This is winter and winter I do not like.  We all tend to shut our doors and stay inside.  We shut out the rest of the community, no waving to neighbours or chatting to people walking their dogs and passing by. So winter is isolating and increases our loneliness.

In winter it is harder to motivate myself to go out at night.  It is harder to motivate myself to go out when the cold rain is pelting down.  Heck it is hard to…

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Added by only1sue on June 14, 2014 at 11:40pm — 1 Comment

wanting the impossible

How long do those dreams go on?  there are the nightmares where someone is calling my name in the dark, it sounds like his voice and he sounds distressed as he often did in the end times. There are the ones where I am calling his name and the car is just disappearing around the corner.  Last night I had a new one.  I could see him barbecuing out the back of the house but the doors and windows were locked and although he looked my way I was unable to get out to where he was. I woke up crying…

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Added by only1sue on June 4, 2014 at 2:57pm — 2 Comments

maintaining hope

I got up this morning and the sun was shining and everything sparkled after an early morning rain shower.  It is another reminder that life goes on.  Whatever is happening in our own personal space life goes on all around us. We are just tiny specks on a tiny planet spinning in the Milky Way.

It was a busy weekend for me so today I am going to take life easy, or that is what I promise myself. Actually I have to take it easy today as I am taking an…

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Added by only1sue on June 1, 2014 at 2:47pm — No Comments

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